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I'm not sure there's a "best match". I think there are a variety of good matches. We shouldn't think there's just one magical person out there who's the perfect match. The relationship is only as good as the qualities each person (including us) brings to it. To think there's only one person out there most suited for us, and that we have to find that person (good luck!), is to operate from a view of scarcity. To know that there is a variety of people out there that suit us each in unique ways (and we--them) is to approach the issue from a view of abundance. Which do you prefer, scarcity or abundance? Your odds are better if you go with abundance. But it's your call.
I consider myself a pretty weird person. I don't like the things that most people around me like, and I dislike things that everyone around me likes. (Did that make sense? LOL). So, I disagree that there are many people for me. I was lucky to have found the person who "gets" me. He gets the fact that I abhor crowds, parties, attention of any kind (even though he is the opposite). He gets the fact that I can't name the latest hip hop artist but I know the name of many British actors/actresses. He gets the fact that I wouldn't know a professional football player if I stumbled across him - but I can name several pro bodybuilders.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that my husband knows (and tolerates) all of my quirks that makes me "me". Many boyfriends in the past just didn't get me.
Agreed. Culturally, we are conditioned to think that there is a monogamous partner who best fulfills us. In actuality, probably not.
I do a lot of statistical analyses at work, and got to thinking about compatibility. Perhaps there are five or ten people out there who would rate 83% compatible with me, but one who rates 85%. That is my idea of "best match": though that 2% margin is small, this individual is the most compatible person I could possibly be with. Then I started to think about what that means-- is cultural background a big component? Where would that person be? How probable would it be that our paths would cross? If we were compatible, we may like a lot of the same places, but life events might cause is to live far apart from one another. There I digress into more of the romantic stereotype about meeting "the one". But it really comes from ideas about how likely we are to be compatible with another person.
I do think there is someone for everyone out there. Whether or not we find that someone is a different story. I also think we need to be open to the possibilities.
My sweetie is someone I never even dreamed I would be with. He was not my type at all. I was going to pass him by.
Now? He is the best thing that has ever happened to me in the world and I love him dearly. We compliment each other well.
I'm not sure there's a "best match". I think there are a variety of good matches. We shouldn't think there's just one magical person out there who's the perfect match. The relationship is only as good as the qualities each person (including us) brings to it. To think there's only one person out there most suited for us, and that we have to find that person (good luck!), is to operate from a view of scarcity. To know that there is a variety of people out there that suit us each in unique ways (and we--them) is to approach the issue from a view of abundance. Which do you prefer, scarcity or abundance? Your odds are better if you go with abundance. But it's your call.
I agree with you on this, once the relationship gets started, it will only go as far, and as good, as both people make it. However, I do believe there is that one person who will be your better match, who will get you and you him/her. Who will be your equal partner 100%/100%.
I consider myself a pretty weird person. I don't like the things that most people around me like, and I dislike things that everyone around me likes. (Did that make sense? LOL). So, I disagree that there are many people for me. I was lucky to have found the person who "gets" me. He gets the fact that I abhor crowds, parties, attention of any kind (even though he is the opposite). He gets the fact that I can't name the latest hip hop artist but I know the name of many British actors/actresses. He gets the fact that I wouldn't know a professional football player if I stumbled across him - but I can name several pro bodybuilders.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that my husband knows (and tolerates) all of my quirks that makes me "me". Many boyfriends in the past just didn't get me.
YOU ARE MY TWIN! I am like you in all the ways you listed above. I know that I am ...weird. And he just happens to get me and can handle my ways...
I do think there is someone for everyone out there. Whether or not we find that someone is a different story. I also think we need to be open to the possibilities.
My sweetie is someone I never even dreamed I would be with. He was not my type at all. I was going to pass him by.
Now? He is the best thing that has ever happened to me in the world and I love him dearly. We compliment each other well.
For me, I had to take a chance, and it paid off.
Haha, that is exactly my situation as well! I wouldl have NEVER in a million years picked the guy I am currently dating on the basis of type alone. But we are so weirdly in tune with one another, its difficult to ignore. Once we got together, I was shocked at how attracted I was to him.
Yes. I met him when we were both 10. LOL. I just said he is 'the 1' for me because what i felt that day was the first and looks like the last weird sensation i have ever felt in my life. Noone has made me felt that way again, EVER.
That's why i said in the other thread of a what if - i have no hesitation being a homewrecker for him.
I saw his facebook recently was surprised how it hurts me to see his pic with his wife (lucky biatch) sitting on his lap .
Crazy,,, crazy stupid love for that guy after all these years WTF!
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