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I was chatting with a bi woman on Skout and she began to say things like " even though im bi, it turns me off when a man is bi", and "why are you bi? You are too damn sexy for that", "what makes you wanna try men?".
I didn't know how to respond to these questions so I just didn't. She is not the first woman I have gotten some crap from about being bi. Alot of bi women think that it is gross when a man is bi because you know they only think of two men having anal sex. Not every bi, or gay man, even likes anal sex. Women should be proud I am upfront about it. Most bi guys don't even tell their women they are bi and then go out and sleep with men behind the woman's back. Women NEVER ever trust a man 100% nowadays anyway. Even if he goes out of his way, she will find reasons to not trust him and me being bi is not helping my case any.
I was chatting with a bi woman on Skout and she began to say things like " even though im bi, it turns me off when a man is bi", and "why are you bi? You are too damn sexy for that", "what makes you wanna try men?".
I didn't know how to respond to these questions so I just didn't. She is not the first woman I have gotten some crap from about being bi. Alot of bi women think that it is gross when a man is bi because you know they only think of two men having anal sex. Not every bi, or gay man, even likes anal sex. Women should be proud I am upfront about it. Most bi guys don't even tell their women they are bi and then go out and sleep with men behind the woman's back. Women NEVER ever trust a man 100% nowadays anyway. Even if he goes out of his way, she will find reasons to not trust him and me being bi is not helping my case any.
That's ok, though. I can just grow old alone.
Don't be so melodramatic.
Doesn't being bi DOUBLE your chances of getting a partner?
Doesn't being bi DOUBLE your chances of getting a partner?
Not really. You would think so. Its even worse with men. Most of them won't date a bi guy cause they are afraid a bi man will leave them for an "easier" life to have a wife and kids.
There certainly still is a double standard. I think a lot of it is related to the whole anal sex/idea that lesbians or bi women are just 'fooling around', while two guys are having real penetrate sex together. I suppose she might also fear you have STD's or something.
It's probably why a lot of bi men are in the closet today. I guess some women are also afraid you might leave them for a man. I think men aren't so afraid women won't leave them because well, they're 'the man' and a woman doesn't have what they have.
I do personally think, however, that while many bi women might be hypocritical about it, genuine bi women are probably more understanding/open in general so they would be your best bet.
I once read a story about a bisexual couple in Atlanta, a husband and wife. Both were Catholic. They claimed that it kept their marriage together. They claimed that they were in love with each other, but continued to experiment on the side. No mention of health concerns was made. Personally, this doesn't sound like much of a marriage at all. However, I bet that, if someone didn't know what they were REALLY up to, they'd probably make for colorful and interesting neighbors. One would just hope they don't spike your iced tea!
Seriously, though, once in a relationship, any of this crap needs to stop. But then, if one party feels they are entitled to do so, then so should the other party. Arrangements like this are dysfunctional and probably take a huge psychological toll. I seriously think that the bi-wife/straight-husband combination will also eventually unravel over this sort of arrangement. If someone's going to "double dip," they need to remain single.
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
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Quote:
Originally Posted by robertpolyglot
I once read a story about a bisexual couple in Atlanta, a husband and wife. Both were Catholic. They claimed that it kept their marriage together. They claimed that they were in love with each other, but continued to experiment on the side. No mention of health concerns was made. Personally, this doesn't sound like much of a marriage at all. However, I bet that, if someone didn't know what they were REALLY up to, they'd probably make for colorful and interesting neighbors. One would just hope they don't spike your iced tea!
Seriously, though, once in a relationship, any of this crap needs to stop. But then, if one party feels they are entitled to do so, then so should the other party. Arrangements like this are dysfunctional and probably take a huge psychological toll. I seriously think that the bi-wife/straight-husband combination will also eventually unravel over this sort of arrangement. If someone's going to "double dip," they need to remain single.
Yes I'd probably prefer my wife remained faithful to me, whether a man or a woman.
I really hate this double standard in the bisexual community -- it's okay for women (because it's "natural" and their husbands can watch) but not for men (who are often just seen as gay). I have even had friends who had no problem with me liking men and women, since I'm a woman, but they would then turn around and say that they could not accept a bisexual boyfriend or husband. When I asked why, it was the usual response, "I'm afraid he'll leave me for a man."
I really, really do not understand that train of thought. I told them that monogamous bisexuals do exist (hello! one right here!) and that when someone is in a monogamous relationship, they want to be with you and only you, so what are you really afraid of? And even if the relationship does end, you don't know who he is going to fall for, and by then why would it even matter?
Also, I hate that bisexuals are stereotyped as cheaters and that we're automatically seen as polygamous and up for threesomes. Some are, and some aren't.
And then you have gay men who refuse to believe bi men exist and say that they're just not all the way out of the closet yet. It seems bi women are liars who are bi for the attention and bi men are just gay men in disguise. Bisexuals cannot win for losing.
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,047,835 times
Reputation: 11862
Very true silverbelles bisexuals are much misunderstood by society. Is a bisexual woman any more capable of being monogamous than a bi man? I mean, really.
To the OP Women have always been more accepted then men when it comes to being gay or bi, society as a whole seems much more tolerent. Even more so if the two women are attractive.
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