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Oh, come on, are you seriously telling me that based on the information the OP supplied, that you can't understand why the guy might have gotten the wrong impression ?
Agreed, the OP didn't really do anything wrong, but it appears there's been a misunderstanding, and personally I can see why that might have happened.
What misunderstanding? I'm in a relationship of 4 years, I say I can meet you on days I don't spend time with my partner...is that now an invitation to make inappropriate comments and to invite me out to dinner and movies?
The fact is, he knew it wasn't right. In his email after he asked about dinner and movies he specifically said "I know you're involved and I don't want to mess that up." So either I took it the wrong way and he just wants company, or he was implying a date...either way I just don't think it's appropriate to ask someone who is in a relationship out to movies and dinner unless you've been friends for sometime. I thought that was blatant disrespect to my g/f, that's all.
OP I'm confused. You like women right? So what's wrong with hanging out with him couldn't you consider it more like 'bromance' bonding/friendship or something? since you both like women. Unless you like like him? then you're really confused sexually maybe. Bi?
I'd say he's 50, depressed and probably having a bit of a crisis - not that it excuses inappropriate behavior. Either that, or now you know why he's divorced.
Back out of the arrangement if that's what makes you most comfortable. You extended your friendship and your professional help with the best of intentions, and learned that he either doesn't respect boundaries or doesn't know much about them. I suspect this guy is going to have a rocky time of it in the single and middle-aged environment, but that's not your problem AT ALL.
OP I'm confused. You like women right? So what's wrong with hanging out with him couldn't you consider it more like 'bromance' bonding/friendship or something? since you both like women. Unless you like like him? then you're really confused sexually maybe. Bi?
I don't think there is anything wrong. I just felt a little uncomfortable with him asking me out to movies/dinner and acting slightly inappropriately with his comments. I just don't understand why I can't have a professional and possibly social relationship with a man without the invitations to dinner/movies (w/o my g/f), the "you are beautiful" comments...then he texts me, "I miss you." What the hell is that supposed to be, we've known each other like a week!
I'd say he's 50, depressed and probably having a bit of a crisis - not that it excuses inappropriate behavior. Either that, or now you know why he's divorced.
Back out of the arrangement if that's what makes you most comfortable. You extended your friendship and your professional help with the best of intentions, and learned that he either doesn't respect boundaries or doesn't know much about them. I suspect this guy is going to have a rocky time of it in the single and middle-aged environment, but that's not your problem AT ALL.
Yes, he is everything you describe. Many times he has mentioned that he lost it all and things don't really matter anymore. He's waiting for his son to come join him here in December. I realize it's not my problem and I'm not trying to make it my problem. I just want to help someone with something I know and it just so happened that we are from the same area up North and we both like current events and talking about economics/business etc...I am fine with that. I told him I had a g/f so that he would understand why I don't know from each week to the next when I'll be available due to her schedule and also to avoid this situation. Why do some men almost disregard a same-sex relationship, like it holds less value than if I was say with a guy? That annoys me.
Yes, he is everything you describe. Many times he has mentioned that he lost it all and things don't really matter anymore. He's waiting for his son to come join him here in December. I realize it's not my problem and I'm not trying to make it my problem. I just want to help someone with something I know and it just so happened that we are from the same area up North and we both like current events and talking about economics/business etc...I am fine with that. I told him I had a g/f so that he would understand why I don't know from each week to the next when I'll be available due to her schedule and also to avoid this situation. Why do some men almost disregard a same-sex relationship, like it holds less value than if I was say with a guy? That annoys me.
Because he's 50 and from a less enlightened generation? Because he currently has something to prove? Because he's grabbing at any possibility or hint of kindness that comes his way?
Many guys, especially older guys, may not accept a girl/girl relationship as being valid, serious, permanent, etc... Also, as mentioned many would like to be in a threesome... It doesn't mean that the guy is harmful, bad and such. You would be better to judge that as you have talked with him.
I would make a comment that you are in a commited, monogamous relationship and that helping him at the business center with excel is fine, however you and your SO prefer to spend your free time as quality time together with each other...
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