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Look i dunno where to put this. But in the past years i have been dating off and on. Haven't found the right person because i refuse to settle. Well I have been single for a year now and since then i moved out and have my own house and money and very independant and i love it. I have 5 older brothers all of them are married with kids. Well my sisters in-law sometimes still ask me occasionally when i am going to settle down because i just turned 29 and that i am not getting younger and that i need to be married off.
While my family and me were walking through the cow pastures she mentioned that to me. and i had enough of it and I said " What is with you on me getting married, why you want me to be a stay at home mom, control freak and sitting down all the time while my husband works 2 jobs and on prozac?,I don;t think so" (thats whats happening in their marriage)and i walked off and my brother started laughing and she gave him a dirty look.
Only 2 of my brothers marriage fell apart.
Then another time my other sister in-law said if i only lost 20 pounds my chances of getting a date is pretty high and my responce was " well i see overweight couples, and i have known friends who are thin and pretty where they left there high school sweethearts, you want me to tell them to drop 20 lbs also"
And then she was like " don't you want a guy to tell you, you have a hot body?" and i said " I don't need a guy to tell me that i am special"
sister in-law: Well who are you going to grow old with?
me: myself, let's say your 85 and then my brother dies before you do, who do you grow old with then?
*she had a confused look on her face and thought about it for a sec and walked off
They asked, you answered. If they didn't like your answer, that's not your problem. And perhaps, you made them think about their unexamined assumptions about life and marriage.
I suspect you resent them asking because you feel they are not doing so out of care for you, but only because they are jealous of you.
I think your attitude is a healthy one. You are taking care of yourself, and being the best you can be, so if a partner comes along, you will be a whole, self actualized person.
This being said, MAYBE, others notice things about you that could use improvement, so you should just consider them before you disregard them.
I think you are sticking up for yourself. You may try saying something to them, but be slightly less mean about how you say it. Use, "I" statements. I have chosen to wait, I am living the life I want. etc.
I think you've made your point. Next time tell them, That they have made their point, but it is your life. End of discussion.
A really good link for your issue, and many others. Dealing with Difficult People
Oh relatives are great. You're standing up for yourself good for you. You're an adult entitled to life your life how you see fit.
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