Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Alright, so I met this girl at an event. She is a friend of a friend. We talked briefly at the event with two other people and had a good time. I find out a week or so later that she called me cute and was interested in me. I told the mutual friend I was interested. Me and the girl (Sara) started talking over the phone and really clicked. We are basically the same person but of the opposite sex.
Well I was interested and she was at first, but she said she does not want to pursue anything serious. At the beginning of the message she said that she wanted to tell me before anything happened that she wanted to remain friends and not pursue any thing serious. She is currently out of state for the holidays but will return at the start of the quarter. Anyways, she said she doesn't want to date anyone because after her initial four years in college she'll be attending graduate school somewhere.
In fear of a messy break, she said she would like to remain friends and let the cards fall where they may. I told her I really enjoyed talked to her and would like to continue talking to her in the future and possibly exploring something more than friends. To this she replied that it would not be fair to either of us since we would only have about a year together at school and that she wants to be able to fully concentrate on her studies at graduate school.
I was bummed out when I heard all of that but I understood. The part that confused me was when she said she still wanted to hang out and talk. I said that sounded good but that I didn't have any ideas of what to do anymore. She asked what I had in mind and I said dinner. She said that 'dinner is still okay!' and that I was over thinking it saying whatever happens, happens.
Idk if she really wants just to be friends (according to the mutual friend she thinks I'm really funny), is stringing me along on purpose/inadvertently or if she wants to pursue something with the benefits of a relationship without the title (fwb). I might be getting ahead of myself here but my concern is getting into something physicall possibly with her and becoming attached and wanting a relationship. I feel that she doesn't want the title so she can pack up and leave the second she's done with school and not worry about the situation.
We are yet to go out but she seems (by saying that dinner comment) that she still wants to date? She also said that if we spent time together and we both really enjoyed ourselves that anything could happen and relationship could come to fruition.
who knows what will happen? Why can't you just hang out with her? Why do guys always need to know whether a relationship will come out of it before they decide to hang out? A waste of time? Then move on if all you're looking for is a relationship.
I guess going to dinner falls under her definition of "remaining friends, and let the cards fall where they may". Maybe she just didn't like being put on the spot, or maybe she wants to take it slowly. It sounds like Mixed Signals City. Or Friends First City.
Jesus. I believe you both are crazy.... err have same personality in that you both make a big deal out of nothing by talking about the what ifs without even OFFICIALLY going out on a date.
just go enjoy each other's company why are u both making things complicated? when there really is none? live for the moment not for what will happen in 4 years. LOL. WTF.
Alright, so I met this girl at an event. She is a friend of a friend. We talked briefly at the event with two other people and had a good time. I find out a week or so later that she called me cute and was interested in me. I told the mutual friend I was interested. Me and the girl (Sara) started talking over the phone and really clicked. We are basically the same person but of the opposite sex.
Well I was interested and she was at first, but she said she does not want to pursue anything serious. At the beginning of the message she said that she wanted to tell me before anything happened that she wanted to remain friends and not pursue any thing serious. She is currently out of state for the holidays but will return at the start of the quarter. Anyways, she said she doesn't want to date anyone because after her initial four years in college she'll be attending graduate school somewhere.
In fear of a messy break, she said she would like to remain friends and let the cards fall where they may. I told her I really enjoyed talked to her and would like to continue talking to her in the future and possibly exploring something more than friends. To this she replied that it would not be fair to either of us since we would only have about a year together at school and that she wants to be able to fully concentrate on her studies at graduate school.
I was bummed out when I heard all of that but I understood. The part that confused me was when she said she still wanted to hang out and talk. I said that sounded good but that I didn't have any ideas of what to do anymore. She asked what I had in mind and I said dinner. She said that 'dinner is still okay!' and that I was over thinking it saying whatever happens, happens.
Idk if she really wants just to be friends (according to the mutual friend she thinks I'm really funny), is stringing me along on purpose/inadvertently or if she wants to pursue something with the benefits of a relationship without the title (fwb). I might be getting ahead of myself here but my concern is getting into something physicall possibly with her and becoming attached and wanting a relationship. I feel that she doesn't want the title so she can pack up and leave the second she's done with school and not worry about the situation.
We are yet to go out but she seems (by saying that dinner comment) that she still wants to date? She also said that if we spent time together and we both really enjoyed ourselves that anything could happen and relationship could come to fruition.
It's WAY too soon for either one of you to think about the potential downstream consequences of the impact of her relocation on the 'relationship' between you and her when you have yet to even go out.
You should just agree to spend time with her and get to know her better, before deciding if you want to pursue things further. If she spends time with you, enjoys your company and wants to be with you, all the relocation nonsense goes out the window.
If there's a nice girl who you want to spend time with who wants to spend time with you, then get together with her and see where it leads. You're getting ahead of yourself; just step back.
Thanks for the replies. I know I can get ahead of myself sometimes. Really wish I could turn it off. It just kind of surprised me when she said she wasn't looking for anything serious and "I can always use more friends!" w/o me bringing up the topic. She just sent me it one morning. Anyways, she still wants to hang out so I'm excited about that. I really wish there was an easy way for me to keep my emotions in check and my head out of my ass. If anyone finds one, let me know.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
