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Old 02-02-2013, 06:41 PM
 
5 posts, read 5,144 times
Reputation: 16

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I've been with my boyfriend for almost three years now. He is nothing but good to me. He loves me for who I am, doesn't care about what I look like, and is always there for me when I need him. These are the traits I absolutely adore about him!

There are, however, a lot of things I *don't* like about him...
He has no goals in life, he doesn't have his license, he's too lazy to shave his beard and mustache, he's too lazy to shower every day, he's got a messy hairstyle, he's overweight, he only works out now because I got him a gym membership and even then he only goes when I want him to go with me, he's never been to college, and doesn't plan on going (he's 21, and while I can agree college isn't for everyone, I wish he would try to get a better job than at a gas station...), he pisses and moans about everything, he farts a lot (I've asked him to stop in front of me because they clear the room and he farts ON me). The big one here is the sex. He's the only person I've ever slept with, but I don't enjoy it. He only wants one position, and we always have to be naked, in a bed, under the sheets. This might be personal, but I get horny a *lot*, and sex with him just won't cut it. I'm not a cheater, so I resort to getting myself off, but I just wish he would change. I've tried wearing sexy outfits to bed, but he makes me take them off because having sex = being totally naked to him (but he leaves his socks on...). It's just so boring with him... the same position, not trying anything new. I tried wearing heels to bed and he responded with "my mom always taught me that wearing shoes in bed isn't good".

Basically the sex is just physical for me... it means nothing to me emotionally, and I really wish it would... I've talked to him multiple times asking for him to change, and he says he will, but he hasn't. I'm leaving for boot camp in May, and even though I haven't been yet, just being with my recruiter has given me a new mentality on the world, like zero tolerance for bull**** and laziness.

I know I sound like a total *****, and maybe I am, but I want a guy who will be okay with me being in the Marines, someone who likes kinky sex, and someone who will love me (and only me) for who I am. Is that too much to ask for?

I have a ton of reasons to leave him, but I also don't want to hurt him... His mom and dad and siblings love me, they consider me part of the family, and I don't want them to look down on me for it. I worry about never finding another guy who will love my nearly non-existent chest.

It would hurt me to leave him, but I also think that in the long run, it would be better for myself that way he's not tying me back. I just don't know what to do... Can someone please help?

Last edited by PrivateSunshine; 02-02-2013 at 06:52 PM..
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Old 02-02-2013, 06:41 PM
 
Location: socal
630 posts, read 1,050,994 times
Reputation: 920
oh helllll noooooo

please don't stay with him because you're afraid you won't find a guy who won't like your flat chest. Guys like alllll types of girls, shapes and sizes trust me on this. You don't have to date a loser out of fear. And there are plenty of men who like kinky sex, u sound a bit inexperienced and young. Bottom line: don't waste your time with this loser.

Last edited by laurenaus; 02-02-2013 at 06:59 PM..
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Old 02-02-2013, 06:46 PM
 
7,099 posts, read 27,230,132 times
Reputation: 7454
I think it's time to grow up and admit that this guy isn't much of a partner. Try to do better. I am sure you can.
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Old 02-02-2013, 07:08 PM
 
5 posts, read 5,144 times
Reputation: 16
Quote:
Originally Posted by laurenaus View Post
oh helllll noooooo

please don't stay with him because you're afraid you won't find a guy who won't like your flat chest. Guys like alllll types of girls, shapes and sizes trust me on this. You don't have to date a loser out of fear. And there are plenty of men who like kinky sex, u sound a bit inexperienced and young. Bottom line: don't waste your time with this loser.
You're right, I am inexperienced and young. I've only just recently learned I just want to go out and have fun for awhile while I'm still young. I'm only 19 but I've already got my life in order and it's true he's a loser... It sounds so bad that I'm saying it but he is
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Old 02-02-2013, 07:16 PM
 
Location: Ohio
177 posts, read 304,065 times
Reputation: 172
Leave him. Your both young there is someone out there better. It's going to hurt his feeling ( and yours) but its better to tell now then to wait.
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Old 02-02-2013, 07:17 PM
 
15,013 posts, read 21,713,564 times
Reputation: 12334
Soooooo inquiring minds what to know.... what is the one position he likes?
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Old 02-02-2013, 07:20 PM
 
5 posts, read 5,144 times
Reputation: 16
Quote:
Originally Posted by srjth View Post
Soooooo inquiring minds what to know.... what is the one position he likes?
Lol he likes cowgirl and nothing else
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Old 02-02-2013, 07:21 PM
 
15,013 posts, read 21,713,564 times
Reputation: 12334
Quote:
Originally Posted by PrivateSunshine View Post
Lol he likes cowgirl and nothing else
I knew it!
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Old 02-02-2013, 07:23 PM
 
69 posts, read 56,762 times
Reputation: 123
Quote:
Originally Posted by srjth View Post
Soooooo inquiring minds what to know.... what is the one position he likes?
Missionary is my guess.
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Old 02-02-2013, 07:24 PM
 
Location: Chicagoland
5,751 posts, read 10,407,237 times
Reputation: 7010
Quote:
Originally Posted by PrivateSunshine View Post
You're right, I am inexperienced and young. I've only just recently learned I just want to go out and have fun for awhile while I'm still young. I'm only 19 but I've already got my life in order and it's true he's a loser... It sounds so bad that I'm saying it but he is
Yes, I think you need to get out of the relationship and experience other things and learn and grow. Focus on finding your passions, your education, your career, what kinds of relationships work for you. You are young. And so is he. You'll both probably change and grow a lot in the upcoming years. Maybe he'll find his passion and turn things around. Or maybe there are much better partners out there for you. Who knows.... You are just at the beginning of figuring yourself out. You are smart to evaluate and see that it is not working.
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