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I am trying to help "shortdoctor" since as an un-tall(Use that term since I am around 5'8" which is technically just a little less than average and not that short) person myself, I can identify with a few issues that his perceived lack of height might cause and unlike you, I am trying to help him out.
Its funny the way so many act like the exceptions are the rule. Asian men are typically short. The 5'11 or 6'2 Asian man is an exception.
I am quite familiar with the psychology of modern dating and have done some very extensive research on what turns on people of each sex. One of the things I have observed is that while being an Asian and a short Asian at that(which is quite common) might significantly deter your dating chances, being a tall Asian(6 foot and above) puts you on the other end of the spectrum, this is esp. true about dating in big cities.
For example, a 6 foot Asian guy is a novelty, something not too common. Even women that don't typically date Asian men would want to date such an Asian man because he's not your typical short Asian male, so these Asian men need to only approach a lot of women and they are in the door. It's the exact opposite for a short Asian male like "shortdoctor", he appeals to the stereotype of the short Asian man who's undesirable so he gets the short end of the stick and has to deal with way more rejections, a lot of women might even laugh at being approached by a stereotypical Asian man who's short. However, I am not saying this can't be overcome.
Having a great sense of humor, style of fashion and a "I don't let that affect me" attitude(women call this confidence) does overcome the physical barriers, trust me I have seen some short Asian men pull off great looking women of all races so it's not the end of the world. I would suggest "shortdoctor" to start developing an attitude like that, and not contend himself to being second grade because of his height, it only becomes worse when you validate your lack of dating success to your height even though some of it is definitely applicable in your case.
Now you are rubbing it onto him again, if you can't help it why would you want to hurt him even more. Granted that you mean to say your brother has a great attitude and confidence etc and that's all good, however we are trying to help a poor doctor who's down on his confidence because of his height issues(which is a real phenomenon). What's the point in bragging about your brother here saying he's 6' blah blah blah, and then I like it where you throw the self-made millionaire, now the point is who cares or more specifically why would "shortdoctor" care.
You are asking him to learn a thing or two from your brother, but he's not here to learn a few things from a 6' Asian guy, he's here for advise and that's what you should be offering. If you don't have anything to offer, the least you could do is to rub it in his face saying "Hey look ma brotha is 6 foot and he rocks, you ain't 6 foot and you suck etc etc" which is pretty much what you are doing here although that might not be your intention. As I said, I am 5'8" myself and although that might have been a factor sometimes, it didn't really eliminate my dating potential I just had to learn to be a little more wittier and smarter than a 6' guy and that's about it. Having a fit body does help, women do notice it and like it although they won't say it the first time.
Well, my brother has zero self esteem issue, but he has gone through HELL in life. You don't even know half of the **** my bro went through. My brother has been in the military, has served this country and is considered as a hero. He had been homeless in foreign country and he definitely paid his dues.
No, he is definitely not a doctor, but he did not mind hard working, No, he is not perfect, but he knows how to treat women with dignity, respect, and loyalty. That is why my brother rocks!
I can never figure out why a doctor who has a white girlfriend comes here to whine about discrimination. He already got what he wanted, why the negative attitude?!
Just for the record, I said on my first post, "I wish you all the best, shortdoctor." I even said "tell all the jealous friends of hers that your children would be gorgeous." All I did is offering encouragement. For no reasons at all whatsoever, he all of sudden got all defensive and offended calling me "trolling" when I was only trying to help.
ALl these posts he made in the past are screaming shortman's complex. Let's just face reality already.
My brother's first girlfriend dumped him for a rich lawyer who is ugly, fat and damn short. This is exactly why my brother decided to work his ass off being a successful industrial designer today. You think handsome tall Asian man has zero problems in life? you need to think again. You think women give a damn just because my brother is tall and handsome? You need to face reality again.
The difference between my bro and SOME people is that my brother has bounced back. Nobody give a **** that his girlfriend dumped him for an ugly rich dude, just like nobody gives a **** to a short doctor whine, ***** and moan about so called discrimination.
Got a problem? suck it up and deal with it. Concentrate on the positive and move on.
yeah, my bro rocks!
Last edited by lilyflower3191981; 04-09-2013 at 02:09 AM..
Well, my brother has zero self esteem issue, but he has gone through HELL in life. You don't even know half of the **** my bro went through. My brother has been in the military, has served this country and is considered as a hero. He had been homeless in foreign country and he definitely paid his dues.
No, he is definitely not a doctor, but he did not mind hard working, No, he is not perfect, but he knows how to treat women with dignity, respect, and loyalty. That is why my brother rocks!
I can never figure out why a doctor who has a white girlfriend comes here to whine about discrimination. He already got what he wanted, why the negative attitude?!
Just for the record, I said on my first post, "I wish you all the best, shortdoctor." I even said "tell all the jealous friends of hers that your children would be gorgeous." All I did is offering encouragement. For no reasons at all whatsoever, he all of sudden got all defensive and offended calling me "trolling" when I was only trying to help.
ALl these posts he made in the past are screaming shortman's complex. Let's just face reality already.
My brother's first girlfriend dumped him for a rich lawyer who is ugly, fat and damn short. This is exactly why my brother decided to work his ass off being a successful industrial designer today. You think handsome tall Asian man has zero problems in life? you need to think again. You think women give a damn just because my brother is tall and handsome? You need to face reality again.
The difference between my bro and SOME people is that my brother has bounced back. Nobody give a **** that his girlfriend dumped him for an ugly rich dude, just like nobody gives a **** to a short doctor whine, ***** and moan about so called discrimination.
Got a problem? suck it up and deal with it. Concentrate on the positive and move on.
yeah, my bro rocks!
I understand where you are coming from, and appreciate the sentiment myself. However, that's because i look at things from an objective perspective, like a sort of a neutral observer. The case is different with "shortdoctor" here, he seems to have validated to himself that he can't get a nice woman because of his height which we know isn't completely true while it has a modicum of truth going by the fact that most women usually shun and ignore shorter men(you yourself said earlier that you don't date short men and only date tall men). However, he's a doctor and is going to be far wealthier than most men he would come across on a daily basis but he's not able to focus on that aspect of his because of the negative feelings that are pervading him right now.
His height or the lack of it affects his dating potential by I would say around 30%, if he got the other 70% going for him he would do fine. In fact I would say he would be able to date a lot of men here including myself wouldn't even be able to imagine we could date, simply because I know a lot of women that go crazy after someone that's a doctor. Also at 5'6" he's not even that short, I would have understood his problem if he were like 5'2" or 5'3" but at 5'6" he would do fine for the most part.
"shortdoctor" if you are reading this, take my advise. I am not saying your height isn't a problem, it could be to a certain extent but not more than 30%. Focus on the other 70% and even if you want to take care of the 30%, you can always go for a limb lengthening surgery which I am sure a doctor like you can certainly afford.
I understand where you are coming from, and appreciate the sentiment myself. However, that's because i look at things from an objective perspective, like a sort of a neutral observer. The case is different with "shortdoctor" here, he seems to have validated to himself that he can't get a nice woman because of his height which we know isn't completely true while it has a modicum of truth going by the fact that most women usually shun and ignore shorter men(you yourself said earlier that you don't date short men and only date tall men). However, he's a doctor and is going to be far wealthier than most men he would come across on a daily basis but he's not able to focus on that aspect of his because of the negative feelings that are pervading him right now.
His height or the lack of it affects his dating potential by I would say around 30%, if he got the other 70% going for him he would do fine. In fact I would say he would be able to date a lot of men here including myself wouldn't even be able to imagine we could date, simply because I know a lot of women that go crazy after someone that's a doctor. Also at 5'6" he's not even that short, I would have understood his problem if he were like 5'2" or 5'3" but at 5'6" he would do fine for the most part.
"shortdoctor" if you are reading this, take my advise. I am not saying your height isn't a problem, it could be to a certain extent but not more than 30%. Focus on the other 70% and even if you want to take care of the 30%, you can always go for a limb lengthening surgery which I am sure a doctor like you can certainly afford.
Of course there are some tall Asians - look at Yao Ming the 7' something Chinese-born basketball player
But the majority of Asians are not real tall people, come on now, you know that. How can being "short" among shoter folks really make you feel like a leper?
Dude, this is all in your head!
You are being your own worst enemy here.
This is why I highly recommend you seek some professional counseling.
It is just not normal to continue to make yourself this miserable about something you have absolutely ZERO control over.
Spend your time on things you CAN control, like your ATTITUDE
You seem to go around suggesting "professional counseling" aka "therapy" quite a lot here. Are you a psychologist/psychiatrist or affiliated to someone who's that? Most therapies are a bunch of BS and they just give you unnecessary medication which develop into medical complications in the future.
What he needs is a good wingman, and someone that can teach him the PUA game. If nothing, it will boost his confidence levels significantly. Heck, I am an Indian and I would love to have an Asian wingman. We would be the modern day "Harold and Kumar" bringing down the house. Shortdoctor, if you are around the East Coast give me a holler, I can help you out with this.
Problem with him right now isn't his height to the most part. At 5'6", he can still pull off a lot of good looking women, it's just that he read a lot of negativity towards shorter men and that women won't date short men(just like how you said you wouldn't although you know you would when you meet the "right" one) and let that get to his head to a point where he finds it comforting and re-assuring, and thus can justify his dating failures to his height.
As I said, what he needs right now is a wingman with a devil may care attitude, someone like me. I would take him out to the nearest college town and ask him to go exclusively after the tall women we see around, chances are that with a little of practice and effort, he would be pimping.
Also, I have met women that openly told me that they date only tall men blah blah. I know this girl who's 5'6" who had a bf that was 6'4", and I am 5'8". Guess what, she was crazy about me and that's not because of my height certainly, she even told me she never thought she would date or go crazy about someone that's not 6'. It's mostly because she associated all the manly qualities she imagined in her man to be in someone taller, but when she saw all that in me she didn't give a **** about my height or the fact that I am not 6' anymore. What's in a height anyway, I was a wrestler(BJJ) and have often made a lot of much bigger and taller guys tap out when it mattered, some of the toughest men including my coach were around 5'6"-5'7" and trust me a lot of 6' men would wet their pants at the very thought of fighting them.
Problem with him right now isn't his height to the most part. At 5'6", he can still pull off a lot of good looking women, it's just that he read a lot of negativity towards shorter men and that women won't date short men(just like how you said you wouldn't although you know you would when you meet the "right" one) and let that get to his head to a point where he finds it comforting and re-assuring, and thus can justify his dating failures to his height.
As I said, what he needs right now is a wingman with a devil may care attitude, someone like me. I would take him out to the nearest college town and ask him to go exclusively after the tall women we see around, chances are that with a little of practice and effort, he would be pimping.
Also, I have met women that openly told me that they date only tall men blah blah. I know this girl who's 5'6" who had a bf that was 6'4", and I am 5'8". Guess what, she was crazy about me and that's not because of my height certainly, she even told me she never thought she would date or go crazy about someone that's not 6'. It's mostly because she associated all the manly qualities she imagined in her man to be in someone taller, but when she saw all that in me she didn't give a **** about my height or the fact that I am not 6' anymore. What's in a height anyway, I was a wrestler(BJJ) and have often made a lot of much bigger and taller guys tap out when it mattered, some of the toughest men including my coach were around 5'6"-5'7" and trust me a lot of 6' men would wet their pants at the very thought of fighting them.
huh? wait a second, I am getting sleepy here.
I thought the short doctor is 5'3" all of sudden, he is 5'6" either way, what difference does it make?
I have seen your kind, a lot of them that told me they didn't date a man less than so and so height usually had some insecurity issues. Not that I complain however, I wouldn't want someone who's insecure either. I found it amusing though that a lot them put aside their preference when they met their "match".
I don't think you are shallow for having a height preference, I don't date women who are 5'10" and above myself. I did go out on a date with a girl that's 6' though, she told she usually didn't go out with someone who isn't 6' himself but with me it's a whole different thing. . Life feels good.
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, now the point is who cares or more specifically why would "shortdoctor" care. 
