31 years old..........0% Success with women......Give up? (dates, how to, marriage)
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This definitly isn't a short guy thread - its a guy who has no success with women thread, I just spoke about height because I thought it was worth mentioning. If it really is my height thats the problem I guess I'm eternally screwed then!
Well, we got to be realistic. This guy is 5'4. A lot of women do discriminate by height. It makes it a lot harder.
Of course if he is an emotional wreck, then my advice sucks, but if he is realistic about his situation and willing to do what is required, then I have given the three possible options.
If I was him, I would combine 1 and 2.
There's no point in focusing on something he can't change. I don't think he has to "compensate" for being short. I think he's just got to go out there and get some practice trying to meet women, like his therapist said. Rejection is just practice, not something bad. Eventually, if he keeps actively looking, he'll find somebody he likes who likes him. I don't think he has to move to some other country to do that.
5'4" isn't that bad. I already know an average looking guy that's married with 2 adult children that's 5'3". Plus English isn't even his first language. I find him a little hard to understand with his accent. It sounds like you know the real problem isn't looks. I think you already have your answers and you're working on making them sink in.
This topic is the OP's lack of success finding women, not "another short-guy thread". What's the deal ? Are we going to start saying, "oh, it's another woman with high standards thread ... go read some other threads about women with high standards," "oh, it's another guy wondering if the girl is interested ... go read some other threads about guys wondering if the girl is interested".
um...well...yeah, if it's a repeat within a week or two of another. And another, and...
OP, go back a pg. or two and look for anything by a guy named "short doctor".
The gist of all short-guy threads:
Some women discriminate by height. Some women don't care at all. Other women think height is important, but will fall for a short guy with a great personality. If you go around bummed out, no one will want you no matter how tall or short you are. Confidence counts for a lot (this goes for women too).
And for the umpteenth time, from me, personally: every short guy I've ever known, ALL of them under 5', has had women flocking around him. Get yourself a fun or intriguing personality. Be outgoing. Develop a talent. Go where the women are; yoga class, meditation groups, cooking classes, animal shelters, hiking clubs or soccer leagues. Talk to women.
There's no point in focusing on something he can't change. I don't think he has to "compensate" for being short. I think he's just got to go out there and get some practice trying to meet women, like his therapist said. Rejection is just practice, not something bad. Eventually, if he keeps actively looking, he'll find somebody he likes who likes him. I don't think he has to move to some other country to do that.
No, the world doesn't work that way. You don't always find someone. About 20% of men never get married by 40. A lot of black women never get married. 5% of 40 year olds are virgins.
Rejection is not bad, but if it is not working out then you got to change the circumstances. If OP eventually find someone, then he will be too dependent on that woman because finding someone else is so hard. This can lead to bad habits, such as being needy and that will increase the chance of break up. To find a suitable life partner you need to have options.
Hence, changing environment may be exactly what OP needs. It can boost his confidence, give him some sexual experience and possibly a life partner.
So, your therapist is 100% right, there's nothing better than action to help change your life.
If you want to change your body, the best advice one can give is to join a YMCA or a gym and work out 3-4 days a week, as well as taking some walks/jogs around the area you live in. Active women will be out exercising and you will move by those women. When you see one, make eye contact, smile, say "hello!" and maybe you'll be able to strike up a conversation with a girl, or at least you will have some interaction with women.
If you have any hobbies, or meet-ups that you're interested in, maybe you can go to some events that will help give you a way to make conversation with any of the women there, which will help build confidence which will help you approach other women outside of those events.
But you need to take small steps first, but these ideas I put here would help you talk to women.
No, the world doesn't work that way. You don't always find someone. About 20% of men never get married by 40. A lot of black women never get married. 5% of 40 year olds are virgins.
Rejection is not bad, but if it is not working out then you got to change the circumstances. If OP eventually find someone, then he will be too dependent on that woman because finding someone else is so hard. This can lead to bad habits, such as being needy and that will increase the chance of break up. To find a suitable life partner you need to have options.
Hence, changing environment may be exactly what OP needs. It can boost his confidence, give him some sexual experience and possibly a life partner.
Actually, I think the world does work that way. i.e. We get better at stuff by practicing it. Therefore, I think the OP can get better at finding women by practicing at it. I think that's a more sensible and less extreme solution than moving to some other country that he may have no interest whatsoever in living in. Maybe he likes living in this country.
1. Your personality can compensate for your height, but you need to be kind, fun, sociable and show that you're a fun-loving guy.
2. A good career with a decent income can compensate for height.
3. Find a hispanic women or Asian--they tend to be smaller.
4. Get out in the field and enjoy yourself. Drop your expectations. Make dating a numbers game. Eventually, you will find someone with whom you connect. Just make it about meeting other women. But, be sure to flirt and not move into the realm of the platonic.
5. Find out how other smaller sized guys found their significant others.
6. Disregard statements about need for sexual experience, as one poster said it is critical. You can learn from the Internet and you can explore with your partner. Don't worry about size, experience, and all that crap.
7. You probably will have to lower your standards a bit. There are plenty of women who go dateless, so you will find someone.
Actually, I think the world does work that way. i.e. We get better at stuff by practicing it. Therefore, I think the OP can get better at finding women by practicing at it. I think that's a more sensible and less extreme solution than moving to some other country that he may have no interest whatsoever in living in. Maybe he likes living in this country.
So all of those 20% do not want to get married? Reality is harsh, not everyone will find someone. Some people do end up alone. Yes, we get better at practicing stuff, but this guy is 31. He has been practicing for a long time. When things don't work out, then you need to evaluate what can be done to resolve the situation.
If he does not want to move, then he can do my other option, which is focusing on improving his social skills.
Yo Bruno - You gotta just be a G and say hello to some women. If they reject you then so what? Not like you're being crucified or something. Don't let rejection scare you or make you feel like you're not deserving of an awesome woman. We have threads in this forum all about height insecurity by other men who've never gotten laid and frankly, that's a stupid concern. My friend is short but an athlete. Chicks dig. He just went on a date two nights ago with this chick he met through another friend who's taller and hotter than him.
Have a tough exterior. Be mysterious but a gentleman. Women love that unique mix. Like a Ryan Gosling type or that Clooney character every female dies over.
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I don't think he has to move to some other country to do that. 
