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It's a great feeling. One I wish I could share with each one of you reading this. I've experienced more blessings than I ever deserved. I've had to learn life's lessons the hard way on numerous occasions. And from time to time, I'll get a little moody or restless, but a quick look back in time to keep things in perspective will make these feelings go away.
I suppose it's a part of the human condition to desire something more than "this" and ultimately that desire brings an awakening that there is so much more than the crap we get caught up in living day to day. It happend to me during my lowest low. And yea, she still gets to me and always will, but it's okay. There's not a damn thing I would have done differently and I'll always cherish that night when she stole my heart for the second time. The great wall of China could have a barrier to my heart and it would have come crashing down with one gaze into those eyes. That's when I knew she was something special.
Anyway, I live in faith that everything will work the way it's supposed to. That good will triumph over evil, that true love is real, that we will be redeemed, that there is more to life than what the world says, that I will scoff at death, defy gravity, and see colors that don't yet exist. I'm not trying to evangelize anyone. I feel as though it is between God and the individual to discover what I have and I doubt any level of evangelizing from another would have given me what God has. I've found truth in the words in red. I believe in Christ. This faith is all I have, and with it I find peace in this rat race world we live in (do largely in part of the federal reserve system, but that's a whole nother story for another time).
So I'm content. When it rains, when it's sunny, when I think about her, when I wonder if I'll ever start a family of my own, where I'm going to live, when/if I can afford my own little peace of God's earth on the banks of the Llano river, ect. Does free will exist? I find myself at odds with this topic, but even faith sees past the relevence of the question. Just live life and trust in the one that created it all.
** sees Black Jack22 backing out slowly so decides to follow him**
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