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Old 09-06-2013, 08:50 PM
 
267 posts, read 619,007 times
Reputation: 234

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I am a bi male in my 20s, in Dallas. After going to the clubs, while pretty nice clubs, I couldn't stand the extreme amount of attitude, of guys treating me like crap and giving me spiteful looks without having done anything. I'm not ugly, though not stripper hot. It appears one has to literally be a stripper to get any attention, though.

I find that I don't really have much of anything in common with the stereotypical gay guys. Everyone I meet at these clubs does feminine things and thinks of himself in that role. I'm not heavily into watching sports like most bro-dudes, but I work in IT, my music tastes scream straight guy, etc.

Is it best to avoid these scenes entirely? As far as I can tell, every other bi guy I meet is 1. not only a better guy overall but 2. they all avoid the gay clubs. Just would like some confirmation and thoughts here, thank you.
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Old 09-06-2013, 09:11 PM
 
Location: Memphis
482 posts, read 799,425 times
Reputation: 277
I think bi men should be heavily involved with the ***** community because a bisexual man is indeed apart of that community,and ***** themselves.Why leave your family? Plus how are you going get sex,and relationships from men, if you are not in active in the scene?
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Old 09-06-2013, 09:14 PM
 
Location: Memphis
482 posts, read 799,425 times
Reputation: 277
I am also baffled at the fact most bi men don't get involved with the gay scene. I mean what's their problem? Do they hate themselves because they are in-denial? It's sad,really.
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Old 09-06-2013, 11:07 PM
 
Location: SoCal
5,899 posts, read 5,797,744 times
Reputation: 1930
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rural City Gal View Post
I am also baffled at the fact most bi men don't get involved with the gay scene. I mean what's their problem? Do they hate themselves because they are in-denial? It's sad,really.
STDs, perhaps?
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Old 09-06-2013, 11:32 PM
 
Location: My House
34,938 posts, read 36,270,562 times
Reputation: 26553
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rural City Gal View Post
I think bi men should be heavily involved with the ***** community because a bisexual man is indeed apart of that community,and ***** themselves.Why leave your family? Plus how are you going get sex,and relationships from men, if you are not in active in the scene?
Ummm. You're joking, right?

Bisexual men have relationships with men. And with women. Not necessarily at the same time.

One of my bisexual female friends has been married over 10 years. To a man.

She's in love with him. That's how bisexuality works. People are sexually and romantically attracted to men AND to women. They pair off with one partner at a time, though.

Unless they are polyamorous, of course.
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Old 09-07-2013, 06:54 AM
 
Location: Memphis
482 posts, read 799,425 times
Reputation: 277
Quote:
Originally Posted by meh_whatever View Post
Ummm. You're joking, right?

Bisexual men have relationships with men. And with women. Not necessarily at the same time.

One of my bisexual female friends has been married over 10 years. To a man.

She's in love with him. That's how bisexuality works. People are sexually and romantically attracted to men AND to women. They pair off with one partner at a time, though.

Unless they are polyamorous, of course.

Well,that's good for your friend, but bisexual men, and bisexual women are different, and are treated differently. I seriously believe maybe if bisexual men would be more open to their gay brothers,and conform be who the truly are, then maybe they get treated better in the LGBT community.For a bisexual man to not get involved with that gay community is sad, and a sign of self-hatred.
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Old 09-07-2013, 05:40 PM
 
267 posts, read 619,007 times
Reputation: 234
Say that you're gay and act feminine, and no one bats an eye. Say you're "bi" as a male, and everyone loses their minds.

Props if you get the meme, but it's true. Most people think bi men don't exist, that we're really gay instead. After admitting that I'm bi, people get extremely hostile about it. In public though, most bi guys can just say "straight", and then quietly admit the bi thing to guys they might be interested in..... this will probably be my modus operandi from now on.
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Old 09-07-2013, 06:00 PM
 
Location: Chicago IL
1,360 posts, read 1,694,247 times
Reputation: 1295
Quote:
Originally Posted by jason87x View Post
Say that you're gay and act feminine, and no one bats an eye. Say you're "bi" as a male, and everyone loses their minds.

Props if you get the meme, but it's true. Most people think bi men don't exist, that we're really gay instead. After admitting that I'm bi, people get extremely hostile about it. In public though, most bi guys can just say "straight", and then quietly admit the bi thing to guys they might be interested in..... this will probably be my modus operandi from now on.
I got that meme and you sir have good taste and it is so true.

If I were you I find a different venue for this many people here only have experience with heterosexual relationships for obvious reasons. Some just don't understand others are blissfully ignorant as you can see. I pretty sure you have gotten it all the "your just gay but don't to admit it", "only women can be bi", "your going to like on sex more than the other" speel from people who think they know your orientation better than you do.

You have it rough bro but man that to go through all that crap and joke about like that takes a lot strength some folks can't comprehend.

It sounds rough but you do what you have to do, educate some folks who are open minded to learning and hope for the best in the future.
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Old 09-09-2013, 06:12 PM
 
2,463 posts, read 2,789,918 times
Reputation: 3627
Quote:
Originally Posted by jason87x View Post
I am a bi male in my 20s, in Dallas. After going to the clubs, while pretty nice clubs, I couldn't stand the extreme amount of attitude, of guys treating me like crap and giving me spiteful looks without having done anything. I'm not ugly, though not stripper hot. It appears one has to literally be a stripper to get any attention, though.

I find that I don't really have much of anything in common with the stereotypical gay guys. Everyone I meet at these clubs does feminine things and thinks of himself in that role. I'm not heavily into watching sports like most bro-dudes, but I work in IT, my music tastes scream straight guy, etc.

Is it best to avoid these scenes entirely? As far as I can tell, every other bi guy I meet is 1. not only a better guy overall but 2. they all avoid the gay clubs. Just would like some confirmation and thoughts here, thank you.
Honestly, I have never met a "bi-guy" who is truly equally attracted to girls as he is to guys. Most lean gay, or are straight guys with very high sex drives who enjoy the attention from gay guys, especially if they like quickies. One important thing is, try not to stereotype gay guys. There are many masculine gay guys who are into masculine things, many of which don't like gay bars. Truthfully, I think if a guy is truly sexually attracted to women, it not worth the hassle of being with a guy, our world is still too homophobic, and being gay is usually a lot tougher than being straight. My sense is, that deep down you would like to be with a guy. If you met a hot guy that was really into you, that you really liked, you'd fall head over heels for him, and forget about anybody else.

Last edited by 9162; 09-09-2013 at 06:54 PM..
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Old 09-09-2013, 06:40 PM
 
105 posts, read 284,034 times
Reputation: 153
I'm a straight female and I love bi men. They're really good at the sexorz.

That doesn't help you with anything, but just thought I'd share.
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