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BF and were invited to a NewYear's Eve wedding a while back - his friend - I've met her a couple of times. Sounded like fun - I said sure. I had also promised son to take him on a trip to Key West for his 21st B/D in early Jan, when he was home from college. Son just now gets an internship (hurray!!) that starts 1st week of Jan...so now we have to back the trip up to Dec and spend New Year's in KW. Won't see my son for 4 months until this internship is over, so I'm thinking this trip will be a perfect sendoff. Oh wait....the wedding. Now BF is feeling a little put out. I'm thinking a wedding vs 21st birthday trip - no contest. The trip. Whadayou guys think?
What is the timing of the trip? You said you "have to" back it up and spend new years in KW, but is that true? Do you really, truly, absolutely HAVE to?
If your son is in college, he should have a nice long break in December. If you can get time off to go over new years I presume you can get time off in December.
I wouldn't be happy if I was your bf, especially if you just said "this is the way it is" without taking his feelings into consideration. (Not saying you did.)
I would try to do both. Maybe offer to bring son's friend along.. Stay for a few days and then leave them to spend the rest of the week while you leave and join up with the bf.
A friend? No...I can't be paying for another flight - it's going to be expensive enough for just the two of us.
What is the timing of the trip? You said you "have to" back it up and spend new years in KW, but is that true? Do you really, truly, absolutely HAVE to?
If your son is in college, he should have a nice long break in December. If you can get time off to go over new years I presume you can get time off in December.
I wouldn't be happy if I was your bf, especially if you just said "this is the way it is" without taking his feelings into consideration. (Not saying you did.)
After we got news of the internship, and the dates, the only window of time that fits for him, without pissing the entire family AND my BF off by being gone over Christmas!!! ) would put us down there in KW, over New Years. I have not said "this is the way it is", and I didn't say that I did. In fact I told him that I guess I should cancel the trip...and he of course thought that was the right thing to do. But I've thought about it all the way home today, and I don't think it's the right thing to do at all. I think my son gets ONE 21st birthday. A couple of hours at a wedding...for someone that my BF thinks is a nutcase anyway...I just don't see it. The issue is probably more that it is New Year's...and my BF just does NOT like to do stuff without me.
Your son is 21, not 12. Shouldn't he be celebrating his 21st with friends? I'm dead serious.
You don't have to pay for his friend, just pay for him and he can hook up with them in KW or some other fun place. You can see your son a few weeks later. Maybe your BF can help pay for your trip to see your son later.
It seems a tad on the rude side to cancel long long standing plans......
Life happens, and situations change. She's not even related to this person.
Her son should be #1 in this situation because it's a big deal to get a decent job in this job market, and internships are a big deal. I just don't see a good counter argument here since it's her child that's succeeding and she wants to enjoy some time with him because she will not see him for 4 months.
I can understand that her BF will be a bit upset, but it's his friends, so if he wants to go to the wedding, he should still go, just with one less.
Your son is 21, not 12. Shouldn't he be celebrating his 21st with friends? I'm dead serious.
You don't have to pay for his friend, just pay for him and he can hook up with them in KW or some other fun place. You can see your son a few weeks later. Maybe your BF can help pay for your trip to see your son later.
Um...he will be. This trip is AFTER his birthday. HE is the one that wanted to do the trip with me. We are sort of travel junkies...he and I have done many many trips when he was younger. We haven't been on a single trip together since I started dating my BF - and that's been 4 years.
FWIW, his dad had told him that he was taking him to Vegas for his birthday...but that isn't happening now. And unfortunately, that is pretty typical of his dad. I think it would be pretty crappy if both parents backed out of what was planned.
I am surprised that a 21 year old wants to spend a week alone with his mom. I love my parents, but at 21 I would not have been terribly sad if a trip like that fell through and my birthday present became spending the same money to furnish my first apartment for the internship instead.
I am surprised that a 21 year old wants to spend a week alone with his mom. I love my parents, but at 21 I would not have been terribly sad if a trip like that fell through and my birthday present became spending the same money to furnish my first apartment for the internship instead.
All I can say is - you don't know my son. And it's not a entire week - it's 4 and a half days. He's been wanting us to do a trip together for some time now.
(I just furnished his apartment for this year, and now he's leaving it for the internship - which comes with a furnished house by the way.)
And he HAS a girlfriend. She lives 2 hours away (they go to the same college). This trip is not for her - it's for HIM.
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This trip is AFTER his birthday. HE is the one that wanted to do the trip with me. We are sort of travel junkies...he and I have done many many trips when he was younger. We haven't been on a single trip together since I started dating my BF - and that's been 4 years.
