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I believe, people who takes backs a cheater/abuser are not gullible, nor dumb - just not strong enough to move on. Some people dread of being alone, and the unknown.
I believe, people who takes backs a cheater/abuser are not gullible, nor dumb - just not strong enough to move on. Some people dread of being alone, and the unknown.
I agree with this, and have seen it many times.
Sometimes they are convinced they could not do any better, or that this is a normal relationship. I was shocked when I started hearing about relationships from people where it was just assumed they were cheating because 'that's what men do'. You can either deal with a cheating man, or move on to another cheating man, and these women were completely convinced of this.
That guy must have a lot of money or just spends a lot on her, or she is in bad financial shape. Or maybe she likes the idea of having other options for herself.
I hate it when people see someone who has all those problems (internal and external), and has suffered like that, and they say, 'Oh s/he just likes being the victim'.
People say it to absolve themselves of any responsibility to help, and it's cruel.
There is alot of truth to the statement that one likes being the victim. Sort of like a certain group of people who are actually the majority of the population, yet consider themselves as "minority" solely to retain their victim status. When someone has no self worth, they seek out a partner who will treat them as such. They cannot accept another person treating them well, because it doesnt agree with the way they see themselves. So when a person thinks they are worthless, they would prefer a BF/GF who treats them as such. Its the only way they can attain any sort of calm and sanity in their life. its the only way the world is congruent with their beliefs.
Sometimes they are convinced they could not do any better, or that this is a normal relationship. I was shocked when I started hearing about relationships from people where it was just assumed they were cheating because 'that's what men do'. You can either deal with a cheating man, or move on to another cheating man, and these women were completely convinced of this.
So my wife's friend came over and they were yakking in the other room when I was asked to come and answer a question
Seems my wife's friend found her BF cheated on her. So long story short
I ask. Did you dump him
Looking shocked she said no.
I ask why
She said well he loves me.
And I'm thinking wtf. And I still cannot believe this answer I wanna claw my eyes out. "Besides he said I'm much better in bed than she ever was"
OH WHY OH WHY cant I find a woman that gullible. My wife would see through that from about 20 miles away.
So I sort of gave a incredulous laugh and said you should dump him. She didn't like my answer cause she made what I call stinky face. Well back to watching the Terminator.
"It's a fool who looks for logic in the chambers of the human heart."
Men do this too, it isn't just a woman thang.
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