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Can you love again knowing that the one you love that much is still out there? Yes. Life goes on. You just get up everyday, and you keep plugging. Everyday is a do over, and you never know what is going to happen if you go out in it!
I was with the love of my life for 7 years. We even had a wonderful child together. I trusted her completely and shared every aspect of my life with her and we had, or at least I thought we had, a great life together.
Little did I know that in the fall of 2010 she started having an affair with a guy on the internet through some kind of cyber chat room. I knew she was on it and because I trusted her I never questioned all the time she spent on the site. Looking back now I should have seen the red flags like the frequent text messages and her serious addiction to the website but again I was naive and never in a million years would I have thought anything was wrong.
In the spring of 2011 she told me that her "friend" was coming for a visit and I was actually stupid enough to believe that it was totally innocent. Well, March 1 2011 arrived and she went to go pick him up at the bus station. After they came home I started to piece things together piece by piece. They way they stood a little too close together. The lengthy walk around the neighborhood. That evening while I was on my computer in the bedroom and they were "watching" TV in the living room next to the bedroom I heard the distinct sound of kissing. I peeked around the corner and although I didn't see anything I knew I wasn't imagining it so I decided to bait the trap. Told them I was heading to the store for a while and would be back in an hour or so. She was so distracted by her "friend" that she didn't even notice how late it was and there were no stores open at that hour. So I left the house and stood outside for a few minutes and waited. I came back inside and caught them making out on the couch.
I calmly asked for an explanation but was simply told she was in love with him and was going to be leaving with him in the morning. I couldn't find the words to muster up a reply so I simply went into our sons room, wrapped him up with some blankets and we left and headed down to my parents house.
When I came back in the morning she was still packing some things in her car. I made one last desperate attempt to talk to her and see if there was any way to salvage the marriage but she refused to speak to me.
Found out after she left, after going through all her emails and contacting her on-line friends, that she had been planning it for months. Made up all kinds of horrible lies about me and told them and her new lover that I beat her and was abusive and she was desperate for someone to come save her from her horrible life. The truth was the total opposite. I lived her more than anything and would do anything for her and did everything possible to make her happy. I think her lies about me hurt more than anything else.
This coming March will be 3 years since she left. Part of me still has an eternal fire of hate for her and what she did and how she abandoned our son and I yet part of me still loves her and misses her although I know that the girl I fell in love with is long gone and it almost feels as though she died that day.
I've moved on but it's just not quite the same. Don't think it ever can be.
Wow, I'm sorry. For you and her "new man." Hey, if she did it to you, she most likely is going to do it to him.
Right now, I'm torn. At least two women see me as the love of their lives.
Not quite as fun as it sounds. Oh well, whoever I choose is going to be my love of my life.
I thought I did. I firmly believed he was "the one," my twin soul. We connected on levels I hadn't ever experienced before, and hadn't experienced again until meeting my current beau.
The man from my past set the tone, raised the bar, for all others, at least that seemed to be the case for a while. It was a very intense and passionate relationship and we were, I believed, so connected on every level imaginable. But, it was perhaps fantastical, and I was manipulated throughout much of it. It was intense, but intense in both directions. It wasn't a healthy situation for me at all.
I guess I'm a little unclear as to the definition of "love of your life." To my mind, there is only one love of your life, and that's the person you are with at the end of your life. That's the only person who will matter (presuming you love them, of course).
But, if you're talking about a person who you had the best relationship with, who showed the most promise, etc.? That would be my last ex-significant other. I still don't really know why he broke things off so abruptly. Our issues were very minor and could easily be worked through. He gave me no indication that he was dissatisfied, unhappy, or that our relationship was lacking in a certain way. He didn't tell me that it was. In fact, he seemed just as jovial and normal as usual up until the moment he instigated a situation in which I had no choice but to be the one who said, "Okay, it's quits then -- you get your way."
I might never really know what was going on in his head that day, and I have to be good with that.
The love of my life was my high school sweetheart and when we went away to different colleges, he decided to date others and he dumped me. He is married now and I have not found another love like that one. I did get married but he was never the love of my life, ever.
The love of my life was my high school sweetheart and when we went away to different colleges...
This is what happened to mine. We knew each other since we were 10, he first asked me to be his "girlfriend" when we were 13, and then graduation came along and killed it because he was set on his dream college which was hundreds of miles away.
Even though I feel like I have moved on, I still dream about him frequently so I know he floats around in my subconscious still. Ive seen his parents a couple of times and they tell me he's never married and living a few hours away. I kind of wonder if I ruined him like he ruined me.
Life goes on.
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