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Ok, so we have this person who's been working at my company for over a year. We get along great, but lately we've been finding ourselves doing things together outside work. I'm terrible at reading the fairer sex, so I could use some help here to see if any of you think she's in to me and if it's worth me taking the plunge and asking her out. I'll get to the twist in a second.
When I bought a house, she said a few times jokingly that she's going to stalk me at my new house. At least I hope she was kidding Although to be honest, if I did see her car outside, I'd be the happiest guy alive.. Unless she's walking up to my door with a knife in her hand. I tried to be clever in a text to her a few days ago saying if she's ever in the neighborhood stalking me and wants to warm up, feel free to stop on by. Basically saying "Hey if you wanna hang out sometime..." Probably dumb, but I did it, can't be undone. And it was party of an ongoing conversation, so I didn't just up and text her out of the blue. That'd be weird..........
I believe she has admitted to Facebook stalking me once.. I'm starting to think I should be a little worried about all this stalking she's talked about...
She expressed interest in joining the same gym I go to. I brought her to a "bring a friend" event we had, and she eventually signed up. Now we're gym buddies and always go together. Her idea, I might add.
It seems to me that she tends to go out of her way to talk to me, almost as much as I do to her. Problem is she is difficult to read; sometimes I think she's interested, other times she seems less than enthusiastic to see me, even if we're running into each other in the hall, or if she's coming to me about something. But overall she's quite friendly, and I enjoy spending what little time we have together with her.
So lets add in the twist: I'm upper management!!! We're a small company, so we all have to work together as equals, so I don't see myself as anything much more than a regular grunt like everyone else. They just happened to put "manager" in my title. Either way I know this could be disastrous, but it's really starting to eat me up. It's affecting my appetite and my sleep (I wake up and start thinking about her). I'm a bit shy and very introverted, so I've gone through most of my adult life alone and by myself, with a very bad relationship in my early 20's that left a bad taste in my mouth for way too many years. But it's starting to get old. It's not often I develop feelings for someone like this, so it's really throwing me a curve ball, and I feel I need to act on it or my head will explode. We seem to have similar personality traits and interests, so I'm really considering taking the plunge and see what happens, fully aware of what could happen if things go south.... If I do I need to find a time when it's just us, outside of work, as I don't want to ask her about any of it while we're working.
I know all the advise out there says "DON'T DO IT!!!!", but I also feel I have to try, consequences be damned. I'm not getting any younger!
How would you know if she's cozying up to you because you're mgmt, and she may be positioning herself to get you to promote her or something, or if she's sincere (no ulterior motive)?
Stalking jokes aren't funny. That wasn't appropriate, imo. Of all the jokes she could have made to indicate interest, that was a very poor choice.
I'm feeling a little uncomfortable about the combination of her stalking joke and her wanting to join the same gym as you and attend with you. I'd play it cool for awhile, if I were you, and just observe her behavior and words. This could have "train wreck" written all over it, and not just because you're management. You need to figure out if she's stable, and doesn't have a wack-o side to her.
How would you know if she's cozying up to you because you're mgmt, and she may be positioning herself to get you to promote her or something, or if she's sincere (no ulterior motive)?
Stalking jokes aren't funny. That wasn't appropriate, imo. Of all the jokes she could have made to indicate interest, that was a very poor choice.
I'm feeling a little uncomfortable about the combination of her stalking joke and her wanting to join the same gym as you and attend with you. I'd play it cool for awhile, if I were you, and just observe her behavior and words. This could have "train wreck" written all over it, and not just because you're management. You need to figure out if she's stable, and doesn't have a wack-o side to her.
I would have to say if there is interest it's sincere. She doesn't work in my department so there's no chance of me promoting her to anything.
Stalking jokes were a bit odd, but only made once or twice. But I do look out my windows often
Just curious: can you think of any reason why her interest in you has been piqued only recently, after being on the job in your vicinity for a year? Just trying to see if we can pick up any more clues about her.
Just curious: can you think of any reason why her interest in you has been piqued only recently, after being on the job in your vicinity for a year? Just trying to see if we can pick up any more clues about her.
No, not really. It hasn't really been THAT fast; more of a slow boil. The gym thing happened around mid-summer, with her signing up late fall/early winter. It wasn't until a few weeks ago we were able to start going there together, mostly for personal reasons on my part (moving, damn winter colds, etc..) and she was in the "beginners" program at first. My interest in her seems to have spiked recently, however.
We're both kind of awkward ducks which has made this harder to feel out.
Especially if you format your emails at work like your posts on CD.
ahahahahhaahha i LOL'ed
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Although to be honest, if I did see her car outside, I'd be the happiest guy alive.. Unless she's walking up to my door with a knife in her hand. I tried to be clever in a text to her a few days ago saying if she's ever in the neighborhood stalking me and wants to warm up, feel free to stop on by. Basically saying "Hey if you wanna hang out sometime..." Probably dumb, but I did it, can't be undone. And it was party of an ongoing conversation, so I didn't just up and text her out of the blue. That'd be weird..........
