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Old 04-02-2014, 08:40 AM
 
11 posts, read 9,606 times
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Well, after a few exchanges on the question, it appears that "he has to set barriers between him and people to protect himself". Barriers he didn't hesitate to cross first. He obviously has issues to solve. And now my life is messed up.
So I was right to feel confused, and try and understand.
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Old 04-02-2014, 01:26 PM
 
Location: Newport Beach, California
39,228 posts, read 27,611,062 times
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Maybe he is just not interested in a romantic relationship. Doesn't mean you are not attractive or not good enough, it only means that you need to focus your attention on other emotional available men.

I have attention span of a toddler, if a guy makes me feel he plays hard to get, it turns me off immediately. I'd move on in this situation, just not worth it.
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Old 04-03-2014, 03:00 PM
 
11 posts, read 9,606 times
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You are probably right, but I didn't need that. I didn't ask for anything. I have other issues to deal with...
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Old 04-03-2014, 11:04 PM
 
4,038 posts, read 4,864,752 times
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If you have a boyfriend, why are you interested in someone here? Are you and your bf still "together", even though you're apart? Is he still your bf? It sounds like the guy may be interested in you, but he knows you're in a relationship long-distance with someone else.
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Old 04-03-2014, 11:07 PM
 
4,038 posts, read 4,864,752 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aplcr0331 View Post
This. Here in America men are taught from a very young age that all of our sexual drives and desires are dirty and shameful. We're taught that women are not that interested in sex and that for the most part its a chore for them. They spend most of their time fending off advances from sexual predators and many American women view American males as somewhere between an oppressor and a rapist.

He's keeping his distance because for normal men approaching women is sexual harrassment.
Dude, what part of America were you raised in? This doesn't sound like the America I know. This is bogus. And just fyi (let me guess, you've been in very few, if any, relationships), American women love sex.
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Old 04-03-2014, 11:28 PM
 
6,732 posts, read 9,996,977 times
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What do you mean, your life is messed up? Did you have sex with him, or do something else that breaks your agreements with your bf?

I am sorry I missed your posts the first time around . I would have tried to help. And I will try now, if you say what is going on.
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Old 04-08-2014, 11:18 PM
 
11 posts, read 9,606 times
Reputation: 13
I was in a relationship that was in the process of ending. He knew that I was going through some dilemna. After I realized the kind of feelings I was starting to experience, I thought it was a sign that it really couldn't go on. It is over now, and it had to be, with or without this guy. Leaving far away from each other for 3 years, and again 4 more... I tried to consider things independently from each other, and both me and my boyfriend had to face the facts, and broke up. I am convinced this man experienced something for me but has not recovered from his divorce. As far as I am concerned, I genuinely felt a lot for him, more than I had probably for anyone. I was puzzled by the amount of things we shared, for two strangers, from such different backgrounds... more than with most people from where I am from. I couldn't do anything about it, I even didn't want to. And I must add that it's not a question of lack of physical attraction, on any side. I never had any issues on that side, even though I don't use it to seduce men. I didn't do anything for him to come to me, and it was obvious something happened at a platonic level. But I can't change him, and I can't change what happened/didn't happen, nor the fact that he finally "rejected" me. My life got messed up for the last month at en emotional level. Nothing has happened. I am just sad that his trauma just prevented him from understanding that everything that was going on was normal, and beautiful. I have been suffering a lot, couldn't work, couldn't eat, and felt completely lost. I kept everything for myself. But I'll face the facts, accept them and move on. I have to forget now.

Last edited by lizaberkley; 04-08-2014 at 11:28 PM..
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