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So I resigned from work and this girl I am was interested, a coworker, I decided to ask out on date. So we went out on a Saturday it went great. She was excited as was I. I then was out all week on travel for work. So we scheduled a Sunday dinner after. Well, the day before I asked her if we could do brunch instead as it would be difficult to do dinner. She said she couldn't do brunch. So I told her I could do dinner would just have to push it later. She said no it was ok, so I said for Friday we definitely go out. I also invited her to go to he Bulls game the next day as I had a spare ticket. She kept sending smiley face texts and telling me how excited she was.
Next day at work I ask her if she wants to do lunch, she says no she is too busy. So I say how about later this week, she said she couldn't. So I found it odd and began to think she is not interested. She got very cold with me and didn't have time to chat with in our internal IM system, yet she had plenty of time to chat with our other coworker....but our plans were still set for Friday. Friday during the day she tells me she can't go to dinner because she has a friend's going away party and also a friend visiting in town. Says nothing about rescheduling, so I say ok, she is not interested in me for sure.
Then the following day, Saturday (as I was doing a big move to my new place) she texts me in the afternoon and asks me what I am doing that night, that she really wants to hangout. I tell her unpacking etc. I tell her I am free the next day and we can hang out if she wants. She says no, it's ok and that she will see me on Monday for the Bulls game.
So I am pretty sure she is playing me. Honestly, not interested in her anymore, because she is confusing me.
Basically, she's an impulse dater. You're not being "played", as she's not getting anything out of it (yet). It comes down to what you want from her? LTR? Not happening. The occasional date? Sure, if you happen to be available when she is or wants to.
I know this all too well, as this kind of flightiness resembles my behavior from time to time. Basically, let her get a hold of you. If she can go out, and you happen to want to, then do so. But it definitely sounds like planning anything is out of the question.
I guess this is my thing too. I am looking for a LTR, I am ready start working in the direction of settling down. So I rather spend my energy finding someone else who is more compatible and looking for the same.
Also I am a dummy but I forgot to mention, she is planning on moving from Chicago at the end of the summer, which I am thinking has something to do with it.
Depends what you're willing to put up with. I'd most likely get bored.
These situations are just way too annoying to be a guy. We're expected to pay for all this crap, set up dates and ask them out.. then what do they do? They enjoy the night out, and then go back to ignoring you or cancelling other nights.
I might not have the best viewpoint on it, but for me it becomes droning. If I'm putting effort in and paying for dates, I prefer some amount of respect/attention from them. If I'm not getting that I don't really put much effort into it.
I guess this is my thing too. I am looking for a LTR, I am ready start working in the direction of settling down. So I rather spend my energy finding someone else who is more compatible and looking for the same.
Also I am a dummy but I forgot to mention, she is planning on moving from Chicago at the end of the summer, which I am thinking has something to do with it.
Find someone else then.
Also, I really doubt you have anything to do with her decision.
Depends what you're willing to put up with. I'd most likely get bored.
These situations are just way too annoying to be a guy. We're expected to pay for all this crap, set up dates and ask them out.. then what do they do? They enjoy the night out, and then go back to ignoring you or cancelling other nights.
I might not have the best viewpoint on it, but for me it becomes droning. If I'm putting effort in and paying for dates, I prefer some amount of respect/attention from them. If I'm not getting that I don't really put much effort into it.
This is the point I am at. It's like I keep throwing events and dinners to do, she is all onboard and excited and as it approaches she fizzles out and cancels.
So I am tired of making an effort. I am trying but it has to work both ways.
Also, I really doubt you have anything to do with her decision.
Sorry haha I didn't mean cause of me. I meant I think she doesn't want to get attached possibly because she knows she is leaving soon. I found this out last week, that she is planning on moving.
Sounds like she doesn't want to date or communicate with you at work, or via company resources.
Chill out, leave her alone at work, and date on your time.
Well like 80% of our communication is outside of work.
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