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i am 18, my girlfriend is 17. we've been dating for 1 year now and are happily in love. sure we fight about things, but we make up and everything gets better. now coming into this relationship she was not a Virgin, and had multiple sexual partners however I was a Virgin. it never bothered me in the past that she was with other guys because I know she is faithful to me now. now we both have different viewpoints on sex but we respected each other's beliefs. my decision to be a virgin wasn't religion or anything like that. I just wanted my first time to be special and with someone I love. she made it very clear that she didn't care how long we had to wait and that she would wait until I was ready. well one night we were sexting and I finally felt ready and I told her. we made plans to hang out the next day. we where together all day and had an amazing time, then once it got late we started to get intimate. it was fun but eventually she said she was tired from everything we did that day and just wasn't in the mood anymore. I was completely fine with this and we just lied there holding eachother for a while. then she turned to me and said she changed her mind. we started making out ferociously, and I put on a condom. we started having sex and everything seemed fine until she looked really bored and not into it after a few minutes and even took out her phone and started playing on it. I immediately pulled out and started asking what was wrong and such and she just said that she really wasn't in the mood but she wanted to please me. so basically my first time was 5 minutes of doing someone with their phone out and not into it at all and we didn't even finish. this hurt me because she knows just how important this was for me and she completely ruined it. she hasn't even apologized or anything and she knows how important this was to me. now she gets mad at me when I don't want to fool around or have sex again, mainly because I'm still hurt. I just feel like all this waiting was for nothing and completely wasted. but, I love this girl to death and have no intentions of braking up with her or anything like that. I really want to talk to her about this but I know she'll freak out and start a fight, which I don't want. I've told her that this seriously set me back and I don't think I'll be ready again for sex anytime soon and she thinks I'm joking. but I'm not, I could easily see waiting atleast some months before I even think about sex again. I'm just really hurt by this and don't know what to do or say. help?
i am 18, my girlfriend is 17. we've been dating for 1 year now and are happily in love. sure we fight about things, but we make up and everything gets better. now coming into this relationship she was not a Virgin, and had multiple sexual partners however I was a Virgin. it never bothered me in the past that she was with other guys because I know she is faithful to me now. now we both have different viewpoints on sex but we respected each other's beliefs. my decision to be a virgin wasn't religion or anything like that. I just wanted my first time to be special and with someone I love. she made it very clear that she didn't care how long we had to wait and that she would wait until I was ready. well one night we were sexting and I finally felt ready and I told her. we made plans to hang out the next day. we where together all day and had an amazing time, then once it got late we started to get intimate. it was fun but eventually she said she was tired from everything we did that day and just wasn't in the mood anymore. I was completely fine with this and we just lied there holding eachother for a while. then she turned to me and said she changed her mind. we started making out ferociously, and I put on a condom. we started having sex and everything seemed fine until she looked really bored and not into it after a few minutes and even took out her phone and started playing on it. I immediately pulled out and started asking what was wrong and such and she just said that she really wasn't in the mood but she wanted to please me. so basically my first time was 5 minutes of doing someone with their phone out and not into it at all and we didn't even finish. this hurt me because she knows just how important this was for me and she completely ruined it. she hasn't even apologized or anything and she knows how important this was to me. now she gets mad at me when I don't want to fool around or have sex again, mainly because I'm still hurt. I just feel like all this waiting was for nothing and completely wasted. but, I love this girl to death and have no intentions of braking up with her or anything like that. I really want to talk to her about this but I know she'll freak out and start a fight, which I don't want. I've told her that this seriously set me back and I don't think I'll be ready again for sex anytime soon and she thinks I'm joking. but I'm not, I could easily see waiting atleast some months before I even think about sex again. I'm just really hurt by this and don't know what to do or say. help?
Your first time no matter how good your intentions/imagination usually doesn't happen like you imagine it, but in your case took out her phone? You are 18 try again with someone else, the board collectively gives you a mulligan and you are a virgin again
i am 18, my girlfriend is 17. well one night we were sexting and I finally felt ready and I told her. we started having sex and everything seemed fine until she looked really bored and not into it after a few minutes and even took out her phone and started playing on it.
Cant really say Im surprised. This was bound to happen eventually (not specifically to you) with the sexting, cant stay off my phone because I'd rather live in a virtual world as the real one generation.
Assuming this is real, first I'm sorry you feel bad, it must suck to have a first time like that, with that said, sorry to say but you sound like a wimp.
She didn't mind not having sex with you because she was already having plenty of sex with some other guy or guys. I think she felt sorry for you and thought, "ok, let's just do this so this poor bastard gets his first time" even though she wasn't in the mood (I think she's not very attracted to you), then she changed her mind in the middle and stopped it and changed her mind again, probably thinking "oh hell, we're here already anyway, let's get this thing over once and for all". Still, it was pretty cold to pull out the phone and start playing with it.
Anyway, what is this talk about waiting months to have sex again? Stop looking at this as some otherworldly, perfect experience, it's just sex, enjoy it. I think you and your girlfriend are simply not compatible so go find another one.
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