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I am married and my wife's mother and father are coming down to live with us for an "unknown" period of time. They will be helping with our kids. They have "bills" however that still need to be paid. I am fine with paying them a set amount every month to help with their bills. There is one bill however where I am having a hard time. Their cellphone bill which is under a family plan. They have two kids out of college and no longer living with them who are on their cellphone bills. I don't want to pay their cellphone bills and have told my wife I will pay for her mom and dad's bill but not her siblings. She is angry with me... Her little sister in particular, really really irks me... she is the typical idiot that is not appreciative and disrespect you in your own house... I have already banned her from my house and no longer communicate with her... I told my wife, that they are grown adults with jobs and should be responsible for their own cellphone bills but my wife is still insistent and angry that I refuse to pay for their bills... I think I am being generous enough to pay her parents bills and provide them with spending money already as it is...
Is there anything I can use to strengthen my argument?
I'm assuming they're not quitting their jobs to come help with your family, so why should you have to pay all their bills? How have they been paying for them until this point?
No they are not quitting their jobs, they are already retired. I have not been paying them but I don't really have an issue with paying their bills with the exception of the cellphone bill...
I think it's quite generous to be paying them and providing spending money too. Can you just come to an agreement of a total monthly amount and how they allocate it is up to them?
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Sounds like the price of child care... whose idea was it for them to come live with you? Why are they? Because they need financial assistance or because you need child care help?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Liberty2011
Can you just come to an agreement of a total monthly amount and how they allocate it is up to them?
What I was planning to do was to add them onto my cellphone plan and pay for everybody... Of course I don't want to add her siblings to the plan... that is the point of contention... I suppose I could pay for both their lines and let them handle the rest? I don't think my wife will be okay with that... she wants 100% of bills paid...
I think you're absolutely right, it's very generous of you to pay their bills, I don't think I could do it. It's also surprising that your wife is being so selfish about it. Maybe if you can show her the numbers of how much this Will cost she can understand. College age people should be paying their own cell phone bill.
Sounds like the price of child care... whose idea was it for them to come live with you? Why are they? Because they need financial assistance or because you need child care help?
That makes sense.
Personally, if it means not paying her sister's cellphone bill, I rather they not come... Childcare is cheap over here so money is not an issue which wasn't even an issue before or after they come... I know my wife misses her family a lot... she doesn't get along with them but wants to live near them (go figure)... I thought it might help her with living farther away from them... My wife asked them and then told me they were willing to come... They don't need financial assistance but they also want to be closer to their grandkids... She asked me if it was okay if we paid all her parents bills... I was fine with it... until I found out it included her sister's cellphone bill...
Personally, if it means not paying her sister's cellphone bill, I rather they not come... Childcare is cheap over here so money is not an issue which wasn't even an issue before or after they come... I know my wife misses her family a lot... she doesn't get along with them but wants to live near them (go figure)... I thought it might help her with living farther away from them... My wife asked them and then told me they were willing to come... They don't need financial assistance but they also want to be closer to their grandkids... She asked me if it was okay if we paid all her parents bills... I was fine with it... until I found out it included her sister's cellphone bill...
Be careful, this kind of situation can easily lead to you resenting your wife. This sounds like a big change, stand your ground on what you want and don't waiver.
I think you're absolutely right, it's very generous of you to pay their bills, I don't think I could do it. It's also surprising that your wife is being so selfish about it. Maybe if you can show her the numbers of how much this Will cost she can understand. College age people should be paying their own cell phone bill.
She doesn't think she is selfish because I give out alot of money to my siblings and parents... she says this is a way of evening things out... I am fine with it, whatever... her sister disrespected me and I told her to her face that under my roof, I make the rules, not her... and then she pushed back and I told her, she was no longer welcome in my home... I want absolutely nothing to do with her... I need an argument to win over my wife with so I don't end up paying her sister's cellphone bill... heck, I even be willing to pay her brother's cellphone bill...
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