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Women with money in their late 30's and 40's seem to be a lot more cooperative than those in their late 20's.
Something about being a bit older that makes a woman look beyond how much money a man makes.
For most of these women with so called "standards".....If the guy can get her to the bedroom and blow her away...his yearly salary will be a none issue. She will not even care.
I have yet to meet a man that turned a woman down because she wasn't making a certain yearly salary.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wry_Martini
Hmm... no.
Hot sex doesn't pay the mortgage.
Hot sex doesn't contribute to a 401K.
Hot sex won't help me retire early or take nice vacations.
Hot sex won't pay the housecleaner or the lawn service.
Hot Sex isn't an emergency fund to help cover expenses in case of a catastrophic personal event.
I need to get back on subject (sorry for the slight threadjack).
I agree with both of you! Depending on what we are talking about.
If we are just talking about dating... never planning on anything too serious... never moving in with the guy, etc. Then yeah, I don't care what he makes, spends, what debts he has, etc.
But the minute he moves in and we start mixes finances (living together or marriage), then I care. I went through this with my ex-husband where I paid off his debts, put him though school, and he left me. I won't care so much about how much he makes, more so about how financially responsible he is. Is he up to his eyeballs in debt? Does he save for his retirement? Is he going to be a drain on me or use me for money (because I am not falling for that again), etc.
I know a woman who makes a ridiculous amount of $ (~350K) who is not that pretty and I think she'd have better odds in the dating game if she were a schoolteacher for the above reasons.
My cousin's wife makes about that same amount doing cancer research. Very nice woman, but she also weighs 250 pounds and has for as long as I've known her. A woman's value is based on her physical appearance where as a man's value is based on his income and social status.
I wasn't defending superficiality... I do think it's better than chasing the money, but that doesn't mean I think it's a good thing overall. Most of the time guys just sleep with attractive women for the sake of their own egos anyways.
Intelligence has nothing to do with success. Some successful people can be intelligent, or they can be unintelligent. Some unsuccessful people are highly intelligent, but they've chosen careers that don't make them wealthy. Ambition I'll give you, but you can be driven or committed to any career choice, regardless of whether or not it pays extremely well. There are philosophers living in poverty who are more brilliant than you could ever possibly imagine, but you would never be attracted to them because you wouldn't understand them, and plus you want to be 'clean' and show off all of the material items that help to affirm your status to the outside world. You don't want a life partner, you want status. You want leisure, recreational travel, and the right labels on your clothes.
The 'security' argument is fallacious because a mid-level wage can most certainly provide security... what it can't do is provide all of the extra things that a higher wage can. It can't give you the bigger houses, the nicer cars, the prettier dresses... and it's those things that you are attracted to. You want the baubles and the bows... for you and for your children. I bet you would even leave your husband if he couldn't find work, citing lack of ambition... and you would chase the baubles.
It reminds me of the upper class women who prostitute themselves for designer handbags and expensive clothes... it's the same basic principle, you're just being exclusive about it.
I have more respect for women who sleep around because they like it than women who sell themselves for labels on their clothing. I mean, their only issue is an irrational social stigma... at least they're still human.
Me thinks you might be equating gold diggers (chasing the money) to women preferring a partner that makes roughly equal or more income. I don't think women are saying they need a rich man so they can sit on their bums, they want someone who cant match them financially often for reasons other than actually money.
I have to disagree that intelligence (generally) has nothing to do with financial success. In order to achieve a decent standard of living one usually needs an education or the wisdom or both to generate that income. I'm not saying every intelligent person is successful but pretty much if your able to make a good income your not some dull slacker. And most people making poverty wages aren't the most educated or intelligent.
And LOL at the baubles and bows. I make a mid level salary. It is good for my area. I wouldn't ask any more of a partner. For goodness sake man, I live in a barn, drive an old car, I don't wear dresses make my own bags and my kids are grown. But yes one of the main reasons I did break up with my bf was because of his lack of ambition and work ethic. I want a partner not someone else to take care of.
Just like the topic divorces, using the rich and famous is not a good measuring stick for the average joe.
Speaking of which, these guys that marry young, economically challenged women seem to be the ones that get looted in divorce. Coincidence?
The only reason I love to use rich and famous men as examples is because a lot of these guys are fairly average looking. Yet if they become rich and famous, all of a sudden women in droves become attracted to them and would date/consider dating them, proving status/money matters a lot. Yet men don't care about that as much. She's pretty and low maintenance? Good enough!
Just one example i'll use is any of the male cast of Friends. Back at the height of their popularity, a lot of women would consider going out with Matthew Perry(Chandler) and David Schwimmer(Ross) due to their status and wealth. However if they were just regular guys working in an office that total number of women who would have went out with them drops significantly.
Just one example i'll use is any of the male cast of Friends. Back at the height of their popularity, a lot of women would consider going out with Matthew Perry(Chandler) and David Schwimmer(Ross) due to their status and wealth. However if they were just regular guys working in an office that total number of women who would have went out with them drops significantly.
Rather than deal in hypothetical situations (such as who you imagine would date Chandler and Ross), why not look at whom they really did date? Both Matthew Perry's most recent ex-girlfriend and David Schwimmer's wife are on par with their looks. Why didn't they hook up with top-tier supermodels?
My cousin's wife makes about that same amount doing cancer research. Very nice woman, but she also weighs 250 pounds and has for as long as I've known her. A woman's value is based on her physical appearance where as a man's value is based on his income and social status.
Eh. Looks still pretty much rules the game at every level.
If you were a man who made 350K and were short and a minority or similarly low on the looks scale, you'd still struggle.
My generalizations are more geared towards average men and women.
Being rich helps an average looking guy a ton. A ton.
The thing is that average women really have no motivation to become rich. It won't help them get men.
The reason why I brought up my acquaintance is more because being so filthy rich is intimidating for men.
All jokes aside It takes a secure man to date a woman more successful than he is. I do not think i could date a woman more successful than me seeing I am stuck at a dead end job , but going to college that my only saving grace .
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