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I'm a 28 year old woman. Most of my life, I've been told by people that I am unattractive. I'd rather be by myself for the rest of my life than to be used for sex. My question is, why do men who don't find me attractive think that it would be easier to have sex with me? why do men think that someone they find to be unattractive will put out easier? I read somewhere that because ugly women get so few offers for sex, they will be happy to give it up to any man who asks. but for me that's not true. Personally, I don't think any woman wants to be used for sex unless she's a prostitute. I'm turned off from being thought of in that way. it's a turn off to be considered so ugly that I'll be easier to have sex with. I'd rather die celibate than to not be taken out on a date, than to not be approached with respect, than to not be given flowers to, than to not have doors opened for me. I'd rather die celibate than to be used for sex. it's a turn off for me to have a man try and manipulate me because his intentions are to try and get sex as quickly as possible. I'm considered a butterface, so I have a nice figure which I cover up like a nun, because I'm tired of men asking me for sex or trying to get sex from me when they don't value me or even find me attractive. It's not my job to satisfy a man sexually who is not my boyfriend. when I tell some of these men that, some have pulled out money like I'm a prostitute. Or like money will help me to feel less like a human being. like if they give me money then i'll feel more like getting used for sex. I'm so angry and so frustrated, that I've thought about carrying mace and a knife and going in on the next man to disrespect me, but I don't want to do that. So most days, I try to avoid going outside and when I do go outside, I have my mp3 up loud and if I see a man trying to talk to me I just keep walking because I don't know who's getting ready to disrespect me, or who just need help finding directions. I'm black, and I live in the ghetto. It's not just black men, but I've had three white men, two Hispanic men, and some black men approach me like this. just because of how my face look, not the way i dress. I'm not trying to date anymore, I'm trying to be left alone.
1. Wall of texts are never attractive; paragraphs are sexy.
2. It is where you live, the culture is one of "hit it and quit it" or any other no respect for women cliches.
3. If you are truly ready to give up (meaning no plans to go to the burbs or try online) then feel free, just know that as your biological clock starts ticking you may regret it.
Dating is like trying to find a .0000001 carat diamond in a 55 gallon drum of ****; you need to decide for yourself if you should sift through it.
Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. Broaden your horizon. Every good man is not looking for a magazine type beauty. Some men do value more that just looks. Think about all that you have to offer and be the best that you can be.
Why do you think how man treat you is because of your face and not because they just want sex PERIOD.
A lot of men only want sex at certain stages in life and it has nothing to do with how you look. Even extremely attractive women get "used for sex" as you describe. There are many ugly women with boyfriends and husbands as well. If men don't see you as relationship material its usually because of your personality.
However, I don't believe it is possible to "use someone for sex" because sex is something both parties enjoy. Right? Or do women not enjoy sex?
Saying someone "used you for sex" is like saying someone used you for a conversation.
Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. Broaden your horizon. Every good man is not looking for a magazine type beauty. Some men do value more that just looks. Think about all that you have to offer and be the best that you can be.
Many more men than are thought to value more than looks and don't put sex at #1. But, unfortunately, they are a rarer critter in the 20 something to early 30 something crowd. A d relationahips with people much older can have disadvantages. I dated older women while in my 20s. Only one girl was younger than me. One of the best relationships I had was with a woman 6 years my senior.
She helped me grow SO much, emotionally and sexually, and helped me be a MUCH better man. 6 years doesn't seem like much now, it did then. It hurt when I had to let her go, but that helped me grow to. Now, I'm not advocating the OP have a relationship with an older man. Not at all. However, older friends can also be a Godsend.
Some of the best life advice I ever received was from the OLD folks. I had opportunity to interact with quite a few elderly folks since I had to spend some time in hospitals. Some of what they shared was pretty heavy stuff, just dripping in wisdom. So, OP, don't just check out of the human race yet. Look for what's right in front of you. You might be surprised at what's there.
1. Wall of texts are never attractive; paragraphs are sexy.
2. It is where you live, the culture is one of "hit it and quit it" or any other no respect for women cliches.
3. If you are truly ready to give up (meaning no plans to go to the burbs or try online) then feel free, just know that as your biological clock starts ticking you may regret it.
Dating is like trying to find a .0000001 carat diamond in a 55 gallon drum of ****; you need to decide for yourself if you should sift through it.
I agree with this post.
Honestly, if you have a nice figure a decent style, you're going to have guys that are interested. Butter faces aren't complete deal breakers for all guys.
If you are unattractive, there are things you can do to change:
1. Lose weight if that be the case.
2. Change hair style and color
3. Dress better and more fashionable
4. Hang out with less attractive people so you stand out
5. Don't go for men that are out of your league
6. Not all men are out for sex - only the players
Because a lot of men think women only exist for their pleasure. Therefore, women they don't want to seek pleasure with shouldn't exist. You need to get away from that environment as fast as you can, for your own mental and emotional health.
I'm a 28 year old woman. Most of my life, I've been told by people that I am unattractive. I'd rather be by myself for the rest of my life than to be used for sex. My question is, why do men who don't find me attractive think that it would be easier to have sex with me? why do men think that someone they find to be unattractive will put out easier? I read somewhere that because ugly women get so few offers for sex, they will be happy to give it up to any man who asks. but for me that's not true. Personally, I don't think any woman wants to be used for sex unless she's a prostitute. I'm turned off from being thought of in that way. it's a turn off to be considered so ugly that I'll be easier to have sex with. I'd rather die celibate than to not be taken out on a date, than to not be approached with respect, than to not be given flowers to, than to not have doors opened for me. I'd rather die celibate than to be used for sex. it's a turn off for me to have a man try and manipulate me because his intentions are to try and get sex as quickly as possible. I'm considered a butterface, so I have a nice figure which I cover up like a nun, because I'm tired of men asking me for sex or trying to get sex from me when they don't value me or even find me attractive. It's not my job to satisfy a man sexually who is not my boyfriend. when I tell some of these men that, some have pulled out money like I'm a prostitute. Or like money will help me to feel less like a human being. like if they give me money then i'll feel more like getting used for sex. I'm so angry and so frustrated, that I've thought about carrying mace and a knife and going in on the next man to disrespect me, but I don't want to do that. So most days, I try to avoid going outside and when I do go outside, I have my mp3 up loud and if I see a man trying to talk to me I just keep walking because I don't know who's getting ready to disrespect me, or who just need help finding directions. I'm black, and I live in the ghetto. It's not just black men, but I've had three white men, two Hispanic men, and some black men approach me like this. just because of how my face look, not the way i dress. I'm not trying to date anymore, I'm trying to be left alone.
What you read is not true; ugly women get plenty of offers, for everything. If you feel like you're getting used it is because you feel like you are not in control, and that is a terrible place to be.
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A d relationahips with people much older can have disadvantages. I dated older women while in my 20s. Only one girl was younger than me. One of the best relationships I had was with a woman 6 years my senior. 
