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Yes, things have changed. Thanks for acknowledging that. As a Millennial, I can confidently say that if you saw what "dating" has become today, you'd be completely lost.
I'm not going to be dating any millennials so its not something I have to concern myself with. Even so the millennials in my specific area still seem to date the old school way.
From my perspective dating seemed to work much better in previous generations where people actually spoke face to face and got a general impression of one another before committing to a date, a date where a fairly specific code was understood. It seems in modern dating there is much ado about nothing. If it ain't broke, don't fix it.
From my perspective dating seemed to work much better in previous generations where people actually spoke face to face and got a general impression of one another before committing to a date, a date where a fairly specific code was understood. It seems in modern dating there is much ado about nothing. If it ain't broke, don't fix it.
That's just it. Maybe it's an online dating thing. If I had met these people before asking them on a date, I'd feel much more confident with the quality of person I'm asking out and whether I'd want to pay for that person's anything.
Some of you must be real joys to deal with in real life. There's a recent saying; Chivalry is dead and women killed it. Between feminism and the casual sex scene, there's no reason to be spending any real money until you're exclusive.
Seriously? He said the first 5 dates have to be less than $10 or dutch. I understand that he's not interested in marriage or traditional dating by his own admission, so he's allowed to do whatever he sees fit, but no way is that a good plan if the women he dates are used to doing things differently.
There's that entitlement coming out.
I just want it to be clear that there does seem to be a sense of entitlement among some of the ladies with this "dating" game. I think that concept irks me the most. I hate when people feel entitled to things they have not earned.
Granted, five dates seems like a long time. I'd probably know at least by the 2nd date whether I was going to pursue it or not.
Some of you must be real joys to deal with in real life. There's a recent saying; Chivalry is dead and women killed it. Between feminism and the casual sex scene, there's no reason to be spending any real money until you're exclusive.
I just want it to be clear that there does seem to be a sense of entitlement among some of the ladies with this "dating" game. I think that concept irks me the most. I hate when people feel entitled to things they have not earned.
Well, it goes back to that whole "options" thing. If the women you're dating can get guys who will pay for dates, why would they choose you over those guys? If you have something going on to get them to choose you, great. Otherwise, don't be surprised when they don't.
I just want it to be clear that there does seem to be a sense of entitlement among some of the ladies with this "dating" game.
If there's a sense of entitlement, it's because other men created the expectation by offering it all the time. You are basically competing against other men setting a high standard. I am just saying, you can't pin this all on us ladies. Your fellow men helped build the expectation by setting that particular standard.
But you know, it could work to your advantage too. Like I said, I would be thrown off a bit if a man took me up on the Dutch offer and yes, it might make me more cautious in matters of the heart, but if I really liked him, I would still date and stick around. So if going Dutch doesn't scare one women off, but does scare off another... well maybe that one who stuck around was more into you in the first place. Just a thought.
But I would stick with cheaper (or free dates) like the coffee dates you said you would try.
If there's a sense of entitlement, it's because other men created the expectation by offering it all the time. You are basically competing against other men setting a high standard. I am just saying, you can't pin this all on us ladies. Your fellow men helped build the expectation by setting that particular standard.
But you know, it could work to your advantage too. Like I said, I would be thrown off a bit if a man took me up on the Dutch offer and yes, it might make me more cautious in matters of the heart, but if I really liked him, I would still date and stick around. So if going Dutch doesn't scare one women off, but does scare off another... well maybe that one who stuck around was more into you in the first place. Just a thought.
But I would stick with cheaper (or free dates) like the coffee dates you said you would try.
Yep, I follow what you're saying and it makes sense. I'd be more inclined to take up someone's offer if they were going to pay in full. Who doesn't enjoy free? On a first date, I don't think you should take it too personally if he takes you up on your offer to go "Dutch" (because of what I explained; look at what he's up against). I think what would matter most is if he asked you on a 2nd date. Then I think whoever does the asking should pay in full. It's the first date that is really in question here.
I will be sticking to the cheaper dates from now on though. At least then I'll know that any girl who pursues me after that is after my personality, and not my wallet.
Well, it goes back to that whole "options" thing. If the women you're dating can get guys who will pay for dates, why would they choose you over those guys? If you have something going on to get them to choose you, great. Otherwise, don't be surprised when they don't.
If a girl only chooses me based on whether I am willing to pay for a first date, do you really think that I'm missing out on something? The princesses can get lost for all I care. I want someone with substance, morality, and ethics. If I wanted to run a charity, I'll open up a soup kitchen for homeless veterans.
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