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My b/f has 2 kids, but.... They're both older than me and are out of the house.
I wouldn't call it a deal breaker if a guy had young children as long as we could have some of our own if it went there.
Last edited by Sydney123; 10-05-2014 at 06:53 PM..
You do realize some of those single Mother's with children are widowed right?
There also is only as much drama as one allows into their lives.
Not every woman who has children is a drama queen that has a moron ex whatever that fathered their children.
Ok, like i said i don't want to raise another man's kids. Not sure what the issue is..
Ok, like i said i don't want to raise another man's kids. Not sure what the issue is..
Especially when you consider female posters saying they won't even consider men with kids, ,yet let's just forget that and focus only on what the men say
Especially when you consider female posters saying they won't even consider men with kids, ,yet let's just forget that and focus only on what the men say
Women don't fight each other when they have men to fight with.
There is this guy I dated earlier this year who has a kid and he wants us to get back together, but one reason I wont is because I know his kid is costing him a lot of money. I also dont want to deal with any kids that arent mine. Not that I want any.
Not only did I do it before I was married, but one of my most pleasant pre-marriage relationships I had was with a woman who had kids. She and I literally became a family. I was allowed to pick up her kids from school. We ate meals at the table. Stuff families do. I was 24 at the time, she was 31. It was an amazing experience for me and a glimpse of the family life I knew I would eventually want.
I can definitely understand why others would not want to date a person with kids. It worked out for me, though. And if I were to ever find myself without a wife, I'd certainly hope there would be an eligible woman out there willing to date this guy who has kids.
Having no kids was and still is a mandatory for me to be serious with someone because I don't have kids. I am not enthused about getting into an instant family situation with someone elses kids. Lately I have been rethinking this because of the preponderance of single moms out there. For every single mom I can only assume there is a single dad unless the same dudes are knocking up all the women.
I'd like to also hear from single parents (read, both men and women) how it affects your dating life. Do your standards raise, lower, no change? Not meaning to sound harsh or insensitive but having kid(s) already is a lot to bring into a relationship with someone that doesn't have kids, IE baggage. I could see myself getting serious with a single mom that has ONE child but wants more with me, but she would need to be extra special in other areas for me to consider her with other women that do not have a child yet
This topic really hits home for me right now. I have always been childfree which started as a teenage rebellion against the oppressive religion in which I was raised. Into adulthood my motive morphed from that rebellious attitude to one of wanting to avoid all the sociological bull**** that accompanies raising children in western civilization. Twenty years of separation from that religion has severely mellowed the rebellious aspect of my childfree stance. I don't necessarily dislike children but outside of a wholesome Amish-like environment I don't ever see myself rearing children. I don't want to deal with public schools, other parents, keeping up with the Joneses, hearing children whine for specific toys or brands of clothing, etc, etc.
That is the way I have felt unequivocally until now. I started a new job back in June at a large company. I work in a cubicle located in a large rectangular room with many other cubicles. Three cubicles down from me sits a very attractive woman (a 9 on a scale of 1 to 10). It is worth noting that I have never dated a woman better than a 6 and I could be happy with a 5. Now when I started at this company, I noticed pictures of a child in her cube so I figured she is married and a parent. I try to notice the personal effects of other people in the office to have an idea of their backgrounds so as to not offend anyone when chatting in groups or whatever. Lately she has been trying to get my attention and it feels like it is not platonic in nature. I found out through a third person that she is a single parent of one son who I think is early school age. I do not know how she became a single parent whether she is divorced, had an oops as a single person or is a widow. Because I see myself as childfree I have not reciprocated interest.
Now here is the problem, there are three departments in this large room: my department, the single mother's department and a third department. My department is being relocated to Mexico City. I am the only person who has not been notified of a pending layoff. My position is unique in the group and it will take an additional 6 to 12 months for the company to arrange and decide if my role goes to Mexico. I am preparing for that eventuality. As of the end of March all my co-workers as well as the third department will be laid off and gone. That will leave me alone with the single mother's department and because I will not reciprocate any interest in the single mother they look at me with scorn and treat me like a pariah.
Because I live alone and work a lot of hours I do like to socialize a little at work. Obviously I try to respect the workloads of my co-workers and I use discretion when socializing but I do value the interactions I have with co-workers. I don't want to end up being a social pariah where I work, so on one hand maybe I should show some interest. Of course dating at work is risky regardless of the single parent issue. In addition to the single parent versus childfree issue there is also the potential messiness of workplace romance and the potential for being laid off in 2015. This whole situation is leaving me very confused and writing this post is the first time I have expressed my conflicted feelings and confusion either verbally or in writing. Any thoughts on my situation as it applies to the OP's topic would be much appreciated.
Last edited by AtkinsonDan; 10-05-2014 at 08:40 PM..
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