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I have been seeing this guy for around 7 months, we are both 21.
We were talking about contraception and we both agreed that we needed to be safer when it came to it. So I suggested I will go on the pill.
He then said something to me that I didn't quite know how to take. He said to me ''Well you better take it because I don't want a kid with you, I would never have a kid with you'' he said it in a really spiteful way. I felt as if he thought I was trying to trap him or something and I felt in that moment that I liked him more than he liked me? that's how it came across and whilst that's fair enough he doesn't want kids and I don't either yet, I just found that a bit harsh?
I'm good enough to have sex with, I'm good enough for him to tell me he ''loves me'' but apparently I am not Mother material? I have no idea, but it really upset me, especially the way he said it, as if I wasn't good enough to be a Mother or that there was something wrong with me
Am I normal in feeling upset about this? or have i just lost my mind a bit?
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 37,178,375 times
Reputation: 40641
That was rude of him. Even if what he wanted to say is that he didn't want to be a father, then there are MANY better and classier ways of saying it. But he's a kid, and kids say stupid crap.
And if he doesn't want to have a kid with you, or anyone else, then he should be taking care of his own business, contraception wise (and else wise) to prevent it. I never, ever ever ever leave that as my partner's responsibility solely.
I have been seeing this guy for around 7 months, we are both 21.
We were talking about contraception and we both agreed that we needed to be safer when it came to it. So I suggested I will go on the pill.
He then said something to me that I didn't quite know how to take. He said to me ''Well you better take it because I don't want a kid with you, I would never have a kid with you'' he said it in a really spiteful way. I felt as if he thought I was trying to trap him or something and I felt in that moment that I liked him more than he liked me? that's how it came across and whilst that's fair enough he doesn't want kids and I don't either yet, I just found that a bit harsh?
I'm good enough to have sex with, I'm good enough for him to tell me he ''loves me'' but apparently I am not Mother material? I have no idea, but it really upset me, especially the way he said it, as if I wasn't good enough to be a Mother or that there was something wrong with me
Am I normal in feeling upset about this? or have i just lost my mind a bit?
use a condom for christ sake!!! You want to be a mom with 21 and a bf who doesn't want to father a child? HAVE HIM USE A CONDOM, PLEASE!
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,711 posts, read 41,912,279 times
Reputation: 41454
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beas128
I have been seeing this guy for around 7 months, we are both 21.
We were talking about contraception and we both agreed that we needed to be safer when it came to it. So I suggested I will go on the pill.
He then said something to me that I didn't quite know how to take. He said to me ''Well you better take it because I don't want a kid with you, I would never have a kid with you'' he said it in a really spiteful way. I felt as if he thought I was trying to trap him or something and I felt in that moment that I liked him more than he liked me? that's how it came across and whilst that's fair enough he doesn't want kids and I don't either yet, I just found that a bit harsh?
I'm good enough to have sex with, I'm good enough for him to tell me he ''loves me'' but apparently I am not Mother material? I have no idea, but it really upset me, especially the way he said it, as if I wasn't good enough to be a Mother or that there was something wrong with me
Am I normal in feeling upset about this? or have i just lost my mind a bit?
I would venture to say he probably does not want a kid ever with anyone at age 21. Could have been less damning but probably that is all that is. Please make sure he wraps up as well.
I'm good enough to have sex with, I'm good enough for him to tell me he ''loves me'' but apparently I am not Mother material? I have no idea, but it really upset me, especially the way he said it, as if I wasn't good enough to be a Mother or that there was something wrong with me
There IS something wrong with you in that you are having unprotected sex.
Get yourself some birth control, and never have sex with him unless he wears a condom.
And yes, he thinks you are not good enough to be the mother of his children.
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