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2 weeks ago i went to Romania for 4 days to visit my boyfriend who is working there. I was usually sitting in the room while he was working weekdays. And he left his laptop with me so i would not be bored when is at work. I usually watched videos from youtube, did my project etc. But one day i just started to check his desktop, his files, photos, documents unintentionally. When i realized i am actually scooping his privates, i was like "omg what am i doing?!" and just closed them continued my work. I did not do it to "investigate" i just did it unintentionally and i stopped when i realized. When he realized that i checked his folders after work, he got mad at me, i said i was sorry and he said ok.
When i returned home first week was ok, we were online chatting as usual. But suddenly since last saturday he stopped talking to me. When i ask sth he just gives his answers and shuts up. On wednesday i could not resist anymore and asked if is there was sth wrong. And he said yes he is still mad at me because of laptop issue. I apologized over and over again and he said he is sad and that is it. I gave him 3 days so he can just calm down a little bit. Because i also know he is having very hard times because of his work and his school, also family. His friends also say he is so touchy and acting nervous lately. On friday i sent him a sweet video message, said that i love him, i care about him, what i did was wrong, i missed him, missed talking to him, counting days for our next meeting (3 weeks left only), and apologizing again. And he still does not talk to me at all. I am crying since then and feeling heartbroken.
What would you do in such a thing? To be honest i did not do something sooo big, didn't steal his money or cheated. But he is overreacting so much? What should i do? What would you do? Why a guy treats his girlfriend like this?
If I don't believe you, I doubt he believes you did it "unintentionally."
He thinks you violated his trust. He handed you his laptop and probably thinks you searched the WHOLE thing while he was gone. Violation of privacy and trust.
If I don't believe you, I doubt he believes you did it "unintentionally."
He thinks you violated his trust. He handed you his laptop and probably thinks you searched the WHOLE thing while he was gone. Violation of privacy and trust.
The thing is seriously like it was my laptop, i just looked pics and documents etc. For example like entering a room and unintentionally taking books from the shelf and looking at them then putting back, or holding the souvnirs and putting back etc. I hope you got what i mean and since then i all the time trust in him, and he knows that. I trust in him more than he does himself. Even when i am alone with his phone i never look at it, when he is writing a message i would not look at the screen. I am actually also trying to be careful with that. But it just happened by mistake and unintentionally. That is why i am so sad, he does not believe me when there is a lot of facts that proves i trust him always.
I am feeling like he just tries to have control and pamper his ego, like he does his friends recently.
2 weeks ago i went to Romania for 4 days to visit my boyfriend who is working there. I was usually sitting in the room while he was working weekdays. And he left his laptop with me so i would not be bored when is at work. I usually watched videos from youtube, did my project etc. But one day i just started to check his desktop, his files, photos, documents unintentionally. When i realized i am actually scooping his privates, i was like "omg what am i doing?!" and just closed them continued my work. I did not do it to "investigate" i just did it unintentionally and i stopped when i realized. When he realized that i checked his folders after work, he got mad at me, i said i was sorry and he said ok.
When i returned home first week was ok, we were online chatting as usual. But suddenly since last saturday he stopped talking to me. When i ask sth he just gives his answers and shuts up. On wednesday i could not resist anymore and asked if is there was sth wrong. And he said yes he is still mad at me because of laptop issue. I apologized over and over again and he said he is sad and that is it. I gave him 3 days so he can just calm down a little bit. Because i also know he is having very hard times because of his work and his school, also family. His friends also say he is so touchy and acting nervous lately. On friday i sent him a sweet video message, said that i love him, i care about him, what i did was wrong, i missed him, missed talking to him, counting days for our next meeting (3 weeks left only), and apologizing again. And he still does not talk to me at all. I am crying since then and feeling heartbroken.
What would you do in such a thing? To be honest i did not do something sooo big, didn't steal his money or cheated. But he is overreacting so much? What should i do? What would you do? Why a guy treats his girlfriend like this?
Thank you ^^
Invading his privacy when he trusted you with his lap top is not "something soooo big"?
I would have talked to you already but only long enough to tell you to find someone else because I was going to look for someone who can be trusted completely.
The better question is why do alleged girlfriends snoop?
The thing is seriously like it was my laptop, i just looked pics and documents etc. For example like entering a room and unintentionally taking books from the shelf and looking at them then putting back, or holding the souvnirs and putting back etc. I hope you got what i mean and since then i all the time trust in him, and he knows that. I trust in him more than he does himself. Even when i am alone with his phone i never look at it, when he is writing a message i would not look at the screen. I am actually also trying to be careful with that. But it just happened by mistake and unintentionally. That is why i am so sad, he does not believe me when there is a lot of facts that proves i trust him always.
I am feeling like he just tries to have control and pamper his ego, like he does his friends recently.
You really need to learn the definition of the words "intentional" and "unintentional", one does not
"unintentionally" take a book from the shelf and look at it or pick up a souvenir. Those are specific actions and opening folders and looking at photos on a laptop or cell phone is an intentional action.
The lack of trust, feeling the need to snoop and insulting his intelligence sums it up. The silent treatment is to be expected. I'd be willing to bet he'd let you stew about for a bit, then he'll dump you.
The thing is seriously like it was my laptop, i just looked pics and documents etc. For example like entering a room and unintentionally taking books from the shelf and looking at them then putting back, or holding the souvnirs and putting back etc. I hope you got what i mean
Oh, yeeeeah. I totally get it. I'm always walking in to Walmart, and I'm unintentionally, and completely innocently, through no fault of my own, ever, taking things off the shelf, and putting them in my pockets. Or taking magazines of the shelf and reading the whole thing right there in the aisle, and then not paying for it.
Not my fault. It just...happens. I don't have to explain that to you though. Happens to you all the time.
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and since then i all the time trust in him, and he knows that. I trust in him more than he does himself.
Well it must be because you know him so much better now! Yay!
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Even when i am alone with his phone i never look at it,
Oh I'm sure. I have no doubt.
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when he is writing a message i would not look at the screen. I am actually also trying to be careful with that
Be careful? About something you just don't do? Hmm.
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But it just happened by mistake and unintentionally. That is why i am so sad, he does not believe me when there is a lot of facts that proves i trust him always.
I wouldn't either.
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I am feeling like he just tries to have control and pamper his ego, like he does his friends recently.
You did something wrong. Own it and like the others have suggested, ditch the "unintentional" dialogue.
With that said, there is no place in a relationship for the silent treatment. If he is unwilling to discuss it I suggest you advise him you will not continue in a relationship like this. Either discuss the issue and be done with it or don't discuss it and be done with it. Either way let him know you're sorry, but done with this issue. Invite him to get on board with you and move forward or move on without him.
While I agree you were wrong for violating his personal information. ...from my experience it brings me to think.......what was he hiding that got him so mad?
Don't worry honey give him time.He may come around.
If not bleh on him.
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and since then i all the time trust in him, and he knows that. I trust in him more than he does himself. Even when i am alone with his phone i never look at it, when he is writing a message i would not look at the screen. I am actually also trying to be careful with that. But it just happened by mistake and unintentionally. That is why i am so sad, he does not believe me when there is a lot of facts that proves i trust him always. 
