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Where are you all hearing that this woman is a bigot?
The fact of the matter is that in most places here in the U.S., and in most circles, it is not normal or common for straight men to accept kisses of any type from gay men. Now if that man is gay or bisexual or "bi curious" himself, that's another story....
I used to live in upstate New York (Elmira). It isn't that different from Tennessee that straight men and gay men exchange kisses as a form of greeting. I have had gay friends. This is not usual, so the woman just gave a reaction to a very unusual situation. I'd say that 9.5/10 woman would have had a similar reaction; some may have returned his later calls or texts, though...
This is not an example of bigotry. For the OP, that relationship is over, so move on. It's cool if this is how you and your friends express affection, but you may want to establish boundaries for when they are around your dates, at least early in those relationships...
I find this reaction very surprising. It seems that some people consider a kiss on the cheek to be quite shocking. And that it would be a reason not to continue seeing someone. I would have the opposite reaction. I would be happy.
Given that the OP has a history of this ^^^, it is a relevant question. I also still wonder if the woman knows about his bi history.
I didn't realize OP had this in his past, but it sure does add A LOT of context to his behavior as described in his "locker room etiquette" thread in the fitness forum:
I find this reaction very surprising. It seems that some people consider a kiss on the cheek to be quite shocking. And that it would be a reason not to continue seeing someone. I would have the opposite reaction. I would be happy.
I didn't realize OP had this in his past, but it sure does add A LOT of context to his behavior as described in his "locker room etiquette" thread in the fitness forum:
Seriously, sexual preference is a legitimate question for any man who considers himself straight but accepts kisses of any form from gay men...
Why? I work in theatre. Most straight men are perfectly comfortable accepting a peck on the cheek or giving a peck on the cheek to a gay men. They are comfortable in their sexuality. They know that a hug or a peck on the cheek isn't going to make them gay.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dewdroplet76
Why? I work in theatre. Most straight men are perfectly comfortable accepting a peck on the cheek or giving a peck on the cheek to a gay men. They are comfortable in their sexuality. They know that a hug or a peck on the cheek isn't going to make them gay.
Most guys are in general, if they're secure with themselves. Its beyond odd that people would take a hug from another straight guy friend, but then reject one from a gay guy friend.
Most guys are in general, if they're secure with themselves. Its beyond odd that people would take a hug from another straight guy friend, but then reject one from a gay guy friend.
It's really homophobic.
I'd take a hug from either, a quick peck on the cheek from neither.
Not horrifying. But also not common. Outside of performing arts groups, anyway. I sing in choruses, very common in the music/performance crowd, much like theatre. Pretty much the norm.
Outside that milieu, though? Not so much.
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