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Exactly why do you want to text her happy birthday?
Exactly what do you want her to do after reading that text?
Exactly what do you expect to happen after she reads that text?
Exactly what are your intentions regarding the entire situation?
Because there has to be a reason why you want to wish her happy birthday that you did not list in your original post.
I wished her happy birthday at lunch the day before her birthday and did not contact her on her actual birthday the following day. No regrets. I talked to her in a group mms/chat briefly on her birthday and yesterday but did not mention it being her birthday.
Exactly why do you want to text her happy birthday?
Because we're friends and have spent alot of time together lately.
Exactly what do you want her to do after reading that text?
Acknowledge it with a thanks. Recognize I made the effort and consider me a friend.
Exactly what do you expect to happen after she reads that text?
Acknowledge it with a thanks. Recognize I made the effort and consider me a friend.
Exactly what are your intentions regarding the entire situation?
This is a situation where a girl has a boyfriend she likes, he treats her well, etc. I am the guy she might be dating if something went wrong with that relationship. I guess my intention is to maintain a friendship with her and one day if something goes wrong in her relationship, I could date her. To be honest, I'm not above being the guy she cheats with either.
It seems alot of young women now days try to live with the best of the committed relationship life and the single life. A hybrid to suite their desires. Take it as far as they can without actually cheating or just pushing the envelope. This girl does this.
My inention now is to maintain a friendship with her, stay in contact, and see what happens. Like I said, her boyfriend treats her well, makes good money, etc., so Im not expecting much. She is a very quality person and I value keeping her as a normal friend anyway.
I wished her happy birthday at lunch the day before her birthday and did not contact her on her actual birthday the following day. No regrets. I talked to her in a group mms/chat briefly on her birthday and yesterday but did not mention it being her birthday.
Exactly why do you want to text her happy birthday?
Because we're friends and have spent a lot of time together lately.
Exactly what do you want her to do after reading that text?
Acknowledge it with a thanks. Recognize I made the effort and consider me a friend.
Exactly what do you expect to happen after she reads that text?
Acknowledge it with a thanks. Recognize I made the effort and consider me a friend.
Exactly what are your intentions regarding the entire situation?
This is a situation where a girl has a boyfriend she likes, he treats her well, etc. I am the guy she might be dating if something went wrong with that relationship. I guess my intention is to maintain a friendship with her and one day if something goes wrong in her relationship, I could date her. To be honest, I'm not above being the guy she cheats with either.
It seems a lot of young women now days try to live with the best of the committed relationship life and the single life. A hybrid to suite their desires. Take it as far as they can without actually cheating or just pushing the envelope. This girl does this.
My intention now is to maintain a friendship with her, stay in contact, and see what happens. Like I said, her boyfriend treats her well, makes good money, etc., so I'm not expecting much. She is a very quality person and I value keeping her as a normal friend anyway.
OP:
Regarding the bolded parts in pink...
You do realize that you are contradicting yourself?
Because you are willing to cheat with her on her boyfriend yet your intention is to maintain a friendship with her.
So exactly what do you want?
A relationship or a friendship?
You also do realize that anyone who cheats with you will cheat on you?
And if she is a high quality person, why would you want to cheat with her on her boyfriend?
And if you value keeping her as a normal friend, why would you want to cheat with her on her boyfriend?
Because to me if someone is of value to me, I would act in a respectful manner towards them.
He's just a typical example of 99% of guy's that are "just friends" out there.
Lol I know this already....
Yet there's going to be lots of women saying that their "friends" are just "friends"
They aren't just "friends" --they're waiting to get their chance....
Waiting for the bf's or husband's to mess up-
So they can make the moves.
How many people are 'friends' with their significant other before they start dating? How many of these people were in a relationship when they met this 'friend'? A lot. This is a common scenario.
Also, the word 'intent' is not exactly valid here. If two people are friends and there's a mutual attraction, then things can happen. You don't 'intend' to be attracted to someone, you just are.
I've known here for a year, have caught her looking at my crotch several times, have had many sexual innuendos directed at me from her, answered more 'potential boyfriend' screening questions from her than I can count, but have never made an outright move her. She has also told me not to pass it along to our (now former) coworkers if 'anything were to happen'.
As far as I KNOW, she does not cheat. She sure does leave some doubt in my mind though. She is a flirt and likes the games and attention.
Another point worth making is that I would much prefer to meet someone with the qualities I like that is SINGLE. However, almost every quality female (attractive, educated, social, employed) is in a relationship. So, you get in line as a 'friend' with as many desirables as possible and wait for something to happen. Most of these women LIKE to have plan B's lined up in case things do go bad.
How many people are 'friends' with their significant other before they start dating? How many of these people were in a relationship when they met this 'friend'? A lot. This is a common scenario.
Also, the word 'intent' is not exactly valid here. If two people are friends and there's a mutual attraction, then things can happen. You don't 'intend' to be attracted to someone, you just are.
I've known here for a year, have caught her looking at my crotch several times, have had many sexual innuendos directed at me from her, answered more 'potential boyfriend' screening questions from her than I can count, but have never made an outright move her. She has also told me not to pass it along to our (now former) coworkers if 'anything were to happen'.
As far as I KNOW, she does not cheat. She sure does leave some doubt in my mind though. She is a flirt and likes the games and attention.
OP:
Regarding the bolded parts in pink...
We cannot help the way we are wired, but we do make choices, and each of those choices holds a consequence.
So the two of you were co-workers, and she acted this way at work.
Her behavior can be considered sexual harassment behavior.
Hmmm...
And she told you that she not want your co-worker's at that time to know if anything were to happen.
I wonder why.
So you would date a female who is a flirt and likes the games and attention.
Another point worth making is that I would much prefer to meet someone with the qualities I like that is SINGLE. However, almost every quality female (attractive, educated, social, employed) is in a relationship. So, you get in line as a 'friend' with as many desirables as possible and wait for something to happen. Most of these women LIKE to have plan B's lined up in case things do go bad.
Not me...
But...
I am married.
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