Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Thanks. You've given me a lot to think about. Maybe I do need to get some therapy or counseling. I do love my girlfriend and I want to marry her. I guess I have been dragging my feet, though. She must realize this and that is why she is so anxious. I am her first love and it amazes me how much she loves me. It makes me love her that much more.
I also have to share that I met with her family today and told them I wanted to marry their daughter. They all accepted me and gave me their blessing!
I guess there is one more thing that is bothering me. We are both overweight and I want us to lose weight. This isn't a relationship deal breaker, it is a problem for both of us. I love her completely how she is. However, we have argued because I believe the best way to lose weight is to workout and be active. She doesn't want to do that. It is really the only serious argument we've ever had. I don't want this to be something that lingers into our marriage down the line. We've also both gained weight since we started dating and I feel like we might continue because we love eating out.
I think from reading your posts I just need to grow up a little. Get up and out there working out and making things happen. I've tried to do that with the purchase of the ring and meeting with her family.
So long, single life! Hello, engagement!
Wow. Thanks for the input but I do value her. Maybe I am slightly immature, but it isn't like we've dated for 5 years.
It would be different if you guys were in your 20s...but once you hit your 30s, it's different. That biological clock thing doesn't care that you've only dated 2.5 years. It's going to run out regardless.
I guess there is one more thing that is bothering me. We are both overweight and I want us to lose weight. This isn't a relationship deal breaker, it is a problem for both of us. I love her completely how she is. However, we have argued because I believe the best way to lose weight is to workout and be active. She doesn't want to do that. It is really the only serious argument we've ever had. I don't want this to be something that lingers into our marriage down the line. We've also both gained weight since we started dating and I feel like we might continue because we love eating out.
Actually, reducing the amount of calories you eat is much more effective in losing weight than exercise. You need to change your diet to one with less meat, less processed foods, more fruits, vegetables, and whole grains. You'll lose the weight fairly naturally if you do that. Of course, exercise and being active is an important part of weight loss, but it's definitely second to a healthy diet.
I guess one problem is our schedules are totally opposite, so we can't do things together during the week. I'd like us to walk every day, but it just isn't possible.
I think she does, but she doesn't make an effort to work out or diet. We decided to stop eating fried food, but I found fries in her car one day. I know it's hard. She's like me, she eats when things are tough. It is an escape for us.
Also, forgot to add that she is out of the state and that was the perfect time to speak with her family. That's why I did it today.
You can't make dietary changes in isolation. You can't just skip eating fried foods and think that will automatically fix it. What is going to replace the fried foods? You have to learn to cook healthier meals...meals that you probably don't currently know how to make. You have to learn to shop differently at the grocery store, etc.
I have a friend who went to Overeaters Anonymous. That was over 7 years ago. She got a sponsor. A sponsor can help you with those very detailed micro-habits that trip you up. She lost 60 lbs and has kept it off for over 7 years now. But that's because she abandoned what has become the Standard American Diet (SAD) of large slabs of red meat and processed foods that are loaded with sugar, salt, and saturated fat.
I just don't want this to continue during marriage.
And what if it does?
Like they say "the best predictor of future behavior is … past behavior"
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
