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ya, hearing phrases such as "Man Up, Be a Man, Grow a Pair, Grow some Balls", I hate, despise, loathe those phrases with a huge burning passion, it makes me feel like beating up a random man for questioning my masculinity like that, and I hate it when people say to get psychological help for that, because even if a guy gets psychological help for that, those gender-phrases will still exist, and the fact that a person will get into legal trouble for instigating a fight like that, it goes to show how society denies some guys the justice they seek when they are trying to vent out their anger, rage, frustration, over the unfairness, injustice of gender roles and on how life, society, expects guys to toughen it up all the damn time.
ya, hearing phrases such as "Man Up, Be a Man, Grow a Pair, Grow some Balls", I hate, despise, loathe those phrases with a huge burning passion, it makes me feel like beating up a random man for questioning my masculinity like that, and I hate it when people say to get psychological help for that, because even if a guy gets psychological help for that, those gender-phrases will still exist, and the fact that a person will get into legal trouble for instigating a fight like that, it goes to show how society denies some guys the justice they seek when they are trying to vent out their anger, rage, frustration, over the unfairness, injustice of gender roles and on how life, society, expects guys to toughen it up all the damn time.
All of this I have no problems with. When people tell me how to approach a woman that's the issue I have and I don't tell other members how to handle their marriages. I'll just do what works for me.
ya, reading this article right here I felt only added fuel to fire towards my rage and bitterness, resentment towards gender roles, because of how god damn assertive and initiative-oriented us guys are expected to be, and if us guys attempt to go for a kiss and the girl denies it, we should never say we are sorry, seriously, I ****in' hate how there is a list of a thousand things that makes a guy look weak and pathetic in a womans eyes, why does a guy saying sorry like that make him sound sorry for being a Man? why do women want a Man who enjoys and embraces being a Man, embraces being Masculine?
Why does anyone want anything? Because it's what they like.
Like how some men don't like assertive women.
Some men don't like fat women.
Some don't like women with over 10 sex partners -writing her off as promiscuous / easy
On the flip, some men don't want virgins, or conservative women
Some men don't like muscular women - thinking them manly
Some men don't like tall women
etc.
Everyone has preferences. If you aren't what someone is looking for, start a search for someone else where the interest and attraction is mutual- rather than rage and get bitter over other people's preferences just because you may not fit them.
Most long-term healthy relationships are the result of both people expressing interest and putting themselves out there. Most times, the guy is the one who explicitly expresses his interest in the beginning. Any guy who stay with a woman who doesn't also express her interest back to him is setting himself up for disappointment.
I agree with this.
I prefer not to put too much thought into who's "expected or supposed to" make the first move. Overthinking this stuff can lead to you shooting yourself in the foot. Most men and women (especially those who don't play games) WILL make moves and express interest in their own ways. Now, how that interest is expressed does often differ between men and women, but that is nowhere close to being an absolute...there's plenty of variance within each gender. Every individual is wired differently (e.g. each has their own temperament)...and was socialized differently and grew up in different environments/cultures. All of that can influence how a person expresses interest in someone and makes a move.
Traditionally and historically in most cultures, the guy usually makes the first direct and straightforward move. However, I think that most guys these days who are comfortable in their own skin would not feel emasculated if the woman initiated assertively. As long as something gets the ball rolling and both people follow up with mutual interest and mutual action, it's not really important who goes first.
I think what makes us bitter is when you put alot of effort into meeting women without getting anywhere andyou decide to let the women approach which doesn't happen at all for alot of us. When you ask why women don't approach men the entiteled harpies show up trying to belittle you for not doing something that they have every opportunity to do but make up excuses about one guy they approached years ago who wanted them to wear the pants in the relationship, so now to them all men who want women to approach are feminine. Pursuing women never worked for me and I was hoping more women would have the ability to let go of their ego's and and give me a chance but I know the only thing I can expect for this is women and men to say "we told you so loser now go kill yourself or get a sex change,".
So?
I put a lot of effort into straightening my hair but it keeps disobeying.
Why do Men expect a guarantee Life Works the way they want it to and call the women Harpies when they don't respond as required?
I really have to remember that this is just a forum sometimes and some if not majority of these posts aren't real....but my goodness....some of these responses.
About something that's not even that serious....
I agree with your sentiment regarding some of the posts, but not that these aren't serious issues. The rest of my post is aimed at a group of posters here, men and women, who I'll describe below.
I think the guys posting the past few pages are wrong is so many ways and among other things, their attitudes and approach to, well, life, is extremely self defeating.
Having said that, I understand why they get frustrated here when people suggest that whether a person is in a relationship, or dating, or having sex is of no real consequence. Really? In what universe? Many of the people saying that are currently in a relationship, some have been in several during their lifetimes, others have all that and have had brief liaisons with people they cared about and with people whose names they can't remember or never knew, and back to most have the social skills and social confidence to believe that dry spells are flukes and that should they experience one, that it will end soon enough and their day will once again, come. No pun.
And how ironic that people with these relatively rich relationship histories who invest untold hours in, drumroll..............a relationship forum, profess to people who are mostly without those experiences that they should get a hobby and if they never connect with someone romantically, oh well, at least they have those candles to burn. No romance, no sex, but their apartment smells lovely.
Not all of us expect that. We know we have to make moves or nothing will happen.
That's right. If you want something done, you got to do it yourself. And if you fail, you find a solution(s). Never expect someone to fix your problem(s).
It depends on the girl. Most of the time, guys should make the first move.
But I've had girls make the first move on me and I wasn't used to it.
I always thought guys had to make the first move until girls approached me which confused me, back in the day.
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