I think I've become the "default" target for divorcees.

[UrbanAdventurer]

Originally Posted by Robert5

My ego would prevent me from dating a woman that had rejected me years prior. Even if she was beautiful and had no kids.

That's kind of what I meant by letting the conscience/penis be the guide. To some guys this will be an intolerable affront to their ego to have women crawling back to them who decided they were a "loser" the first time around. Other guys will see it as a glass half full scenario. Water's warm so why not take a dip?

There's no right answer. The point is him and any guy in his position don't really need these broads back from the past to prove anything. I'm sure he's capable at this point of going out and finding some nice new playthings who don't have the baggage and that's what really matters.

[TMBGBlueCanary]

Originally Posted by Cyber Surfer

Sure, it's normal to find more divorced women than just regular single women on the dating market (varies by area) but I can't help but feel since I don't have all the baggage of an ex gf/wife, kids, alimony, or other issues I've become the easier choice for relationship options.

Not really liking it though.

Your thoughts? Discuss away.

First off, don't bother with those recently divorced women. I would stay clear of dating anyone going though a divorce or just divorced because you'd just be a rebound. But aside from that, none of the women you mentioned seem like you even like them or vice versa, so why date or think about dating them?

As for what I quoted. It could be that or it could be that you took care of yourself when single. A lot of times, married people "let themselves go." All of my married buddies gained a lot of weight over the years--maybe just being busy with families and such and having less time to work out and eating out too much with so many kids on the go.

Just remember this. Women aren't telepaths to know that you have little baggage, no kids, etc. They just know what you present to them. That's your attitude, your personality, and to a degree how you look too. And, what women are looking for in their 20s isn't the same as when they are in their 30s. A lot of people "grow up" and know better what they want (or in the case of divorced women what they don't want maybe). Maybe they are drawn to your stability or something.

Don't read too much in it and date the women you are interested in who are interested in you. Simple as that.

[Cyber Surfer]

Originally Posted by Just A Guy

Another guy who is bitter because he didn't have it going on in his 20s.

To be fair, you may of been right but I hit a positive stride in my late 20s and been pretty decent since. Bitter? That's all in the past son.

[ipdsharkey]

Eh, you're every other guy on the planet. (Welcome to the club...poker in the front, liquor in the rear.) It could be worse: you could've been the poor ******* who thought he'd won the lottery marrying this broad a decade ago who just had his life come crashing down around his ears. There's nothing fantastic about you compared to this guy I'm going to wager. She just happened to hitch her wagon to him instead of you a decade ago and now you can play around with her at fire-sale prices if you want to. Let you penis be your guide. I think the guy she just divorced would rather be in your position at this point.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cyber Surfer
Second was the one woman who did have feelings for me and me vice versa, then spurned me the moment I told her I wanted to be a graphic designer (this was early 2000s when it was a viable career). She married a closeted gay guy who despite having a family with, he did eventually came full out of the closet... but as a pedophile. Have been cheating on her for years but she stuck with the guy God knows why. Made front page of the local paper and everything. I have no qualms saying all this because quite frankly during the time they were together, they were insufferable snobs to me at work (work couple if you will). Guess you could call it a grudge but I'm finally over it now.

Come to find out, she's been on my facebook page often according to her step mom. She (the step mom) insinuated that she hopes to set up something as soon as the divorce is final.

Yeahh, she sounds like the classic gold-digging snob. We've all known folks like this and end up feeling very sorry for whoever she eventually gets her hooks into. The guys who fall for these types are generally hopeless saps anyway who have no balls and need someone to boss them around.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cyber Surfer
There's one more that recently came into contact me last year, but it's not a big deal as I knew I had no chance with her. But all three had in common was that they remember me the most by saying "You were so nice to me". But what bothers me is that they're pretending that we were on friendly terms when in actuality I was pretty heartbroken, and a bit insulted from woman #2.

If she came into contact with you you're deluding yourself; women simply don't just do stuff like that unless they have a scheme up their sleeve to dangle their shiny object in front of you in hopes you'll bite. In fact it's pretty rare for them to display any sort of "romantic return" type behavior at all. Men are generally the ones who do this sort of stuff, so she must have really been pining away for you. This must have been a "near-miss" type scenario where you two almost hooked and became an item but didn't for whatever reason.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cyber Surfer
Sure, it's normal to find more divorced women than just regular single women on the dating market (varies by area) but I can't help but feel since I don't have all the baggage of an ex gf/wife, kids, alimony, or other issues I've become the easier choice for relationship options.

Not really liking it though.

Your thoughts? Discuss away.

Of course that is the situation. You don't have the baggage and have spent the last decade working tirelessly on your career and have (hopefully) had some success in life. Now these women who wouldn't give you time of day when you first met them see you as ready to be harvested for goods and services. The tables have turned and you're the shiny object they want now. Feel free to enjoy yourself to the extent your conscience allows and for god's sake don't sign anything silly like a marriage contract.




^^^^^^^^^^^
Wise words in the above comments. Feel free to enjoy if you can until YOU find someone that YOU can be happy with. If you chose to partake of the fruits and things get a bit messy, just say goodbye and move on ...Otherwise don't get involved at all and just move on. You have much to offer the right person..

[11thHour]

Divorcees with kids suddenly having interest in you..follow your gut. It's retching for a reason. Stay away from that trap.