Should I be concerned with text messages? (dating, wife, married)

[Booshy]

I randomly checked my wifes' phone and found sex text messages between her and her brother in law. Messages dating back almost three years. The messages were not all sexual but some were quite inappropriate (IMO) for married persons to be exchanging.

Messages were sexual but were not actual sexting but things like, "I know how much you want me" and "I know how much you like the c":k". Oral sex was implied in a few of the texts as well.

When I asked my wife about the messages she assured me that they were just jokes. She said that is the way they joke together. She also assured me that nothing was going on and I was over-reacting by being upset with the messages.

Am I over-reacting by asking her to stop? Am I wrong to assume, "behind every joke is a grain of truth"?

[mishigas73]

Yup, you "randomly checked" your wife's phone and happened to find this.

You obviously don't trust her, and don't believe the explanation she gave you. What advice do you want?

[fleetiebelle]

You should get in touch with this guy and form a support group: //www.city-data.com/forum/relat...nk-cheats.html Lots of brother-in-law cheating happening this week.

[BirdieBelle]

Do you joke with HIS wife this way?

It's a pretty flimsy excuse she gave you.

But this is part of the fun that comes from checking your spouse's phone.

[North Beach Person]

I'd be more concerned with a wife who isn't bright enough to erase sext messages and then gives you access to them.

[Booshy]

Randomly. I checked her phone to see when our sons doctor appointment was. Also checked her calendar. Saw she was texting her brother in law. No trust issue existed until I read the comments.

[Suburban_Guy]

Is this a serious thread?

Why is anyone checking another's phone messages?

Let me guess, the OP also 'happens to' occasionally check his wife's e-mail, voice mail, and probably invests in some spy tracker software.

[carnivalday]

Originally Posted by Booshy

I randomly checked my wifes' phone and found sex text messages between her and her brother in law. Messages dating back almost three years. The messages were not all sexual but some were quite inappropriate (IMO) for married persons to be exchanging.

Messages were sexual but were not actual sexting but things like, "I know how much you want me" and "I know how much you like the c":k". Oral sex was implied in a few of the texts as well.

When I asked my wife about the messages she assured me that they were just jokes. She said that is the way they joke together. She also assured me that nothing was going on and I was over-reacting by being upset with the messages.

Am I over-reacting by asking her to stop? Am I wrong to assume, "behind every joke is a grain of truth"?

I think the joke's on you.

[Booshy]

No I do not joke with his wife this way.

[Checkered24]

How exactly does one "randomly" check 3 year old messages on another person's phone??


You make it sound like your the victim of snooping another persons phone.


Also odd, why do you refer to texts between "her and her brother in law." Doesn't that make him YOUR brother? Who refers to their siblings as "my spouses brother/sister in law?"