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But what if say your partner said not to plan any dates or activities on Wednesdays because that day is reserved for him and his friends to have game night?
It's really not a big deal. Just plan your dates for the other 6 nights of the week and have a date night with your own friends on a Wednesday night, which btw is hardly the highlight of the week. I'm sure if there was something you really needed to do on a Wednesday night he would be willing to make an exception.
It's healthy for all couples to have alone time/time with friends. Being together 24/7 can actually damage a relationship. There's nothing wrong with being a nerd. Either accept him for who he is or free him to find someone who will value him as he is.
It's really not a big deal. Just plan your dates for the other 6 nights of the week and have a date night with your own friends on a Wednesday night, which btw is hardly the highlight of the week. I'm sure if there was something you really needed to do on a Wednesday night he would be willing to make an exception.
It's healthy for all couples to have alone time/time with friends. Being together 24/7 can actually damage a relationship. There's nothing wrong with being a nerd. Either accept him for who he is or free him to find someone who will value him as he is.
Agreed.
In my experience, most women are not impressed by a guy that's free to hang out every night and has nothing going on. It's different when you get more serious, but not so much in the early dating stage.
If he had game night on Wednesday, Friday, Sunday and Monday or 4 nights a week that were limits, I would understand not being happy with it. But it's one night a week, no big deal.
Translation: we've had several posts in the last few months about women who had to break up with their guy because they realized there was more to life than worshiping their women as some goddess and being at her every beck and call.
I swear women love to deny men anything that takes attention away from them. It's incredibly hypocritical to because women would just say a guy should just deal with it if a woman were to say reserve Wednesdays just so she can go shopping and to get their nails done.
Oh brother, what a bunch of nonsense. Perhaps the girls you date are like you describe but I do not know one woman who is like that and our friends and family have been married to the same person from 10 years through 45 years. With that many years together I doubt that anyone is *denying* anyone
anything.
OP: No one can answer your question for you, you have to answer it yourself and what is right for you and your life.
Good luck whichever decision you make.
Oh brother, what a bunch of nonsense. Perhaps the girls you date are like you describe but I do not know one woman who is like that and our friends and family have been married to the same person from 10 years through 45 years. With that many years together I doubt that anyone is *denying* anyone
anything.
OP: No one can answer your question for you, you have to answer it yourself and what is right for you and your life.
Good luck whichever decision you make.
Yeah but you are older, very different when talking about 20 and 30 something women.
I am not into the gaming thing, I haven't played a video game in years. Outside of a couple rounds of NHL whatever year, with my roommate a few years back. My brother had play station (or maybe Xbox? That's how little I knew about game systems post-Super Nintendo) and I'd play it with him sometimes. That's been at least 8 years.
But I have my own hobbies and interests, so I perfectly understand it, even though it's not my thing. In my years of being an introvert, I taught myself how to play guitar. It got to a point where I was driving the neighbors crazy, back when I lived in an apartment complex.
So I would appreciate some thoughts. I have been dating a guy for 4 months now and he is really sweet and caring and helpful but he is quite a nerd/geek. He works in IT and has his own apartment but he not only is really into video games but has actually tournaments involving card games like yu gi oh and is into dungeons and dragons. He has even tried to get me to try it.
I definitely like him and he hasn't say cancelled a date for it but sometimes he has set up our dates around it, for example no dates on Wednesdays. I don't know how to feel, I know some will say it's harmless but just the thought bothers me. I was talking to a girlfriend and she laughed and told me it was a bad idea and guys like that are losers that always put their stuff before a relationship.
Of course it's fine for an adult to have hobbies (yes even gaming, D&D, etc) and alone time and time with friends/colleagues/etc all that. Captain Obvious and all that. It's healthy and helps reduce the risk of being clingy and/or overly dependent. I also don't see a problem with having a specific day/evening each week set aside for gaming or a sport or something...as long as you're not too rigid about it (be willing to cancel if something more important comes up...the others in the group will probably understand if they have a shred of empathy). But there's a line. Part of maturity is understanding what's really important in life and having your priorities straight, even if it means eliminating or cutting down on some things. Generally, things like romantic relationships, close friendships, work/career, physical health, finances and family need to be valued and taken seriously.
As a hypothetical example, what if the OP's next birthday (or even her boyfriend's next b-day) fell on Wednesday. If he still has his gaming night on that particular evening instead of having a special occasion with his GF, then that's a bad look for him...assuming both of them work during the day.
Nerdy/geeky has nothing to do with it. There are plenty of nerds, geeks, gamers, whatever that also handle their adult responsibilities well and do their parts to maintain healthy and happy romantic relationships with their significant others.
Yeah but you are older, very different when talking about 20 and 30 something women.
So those who have been married since their 20's/30s started out denying each other something yet they managed to stay married for 20, 30, 40+ years?
Doubtful however, whether you believe it or I was in that age range once and I will repeat that no one I know or in my family is/was like the *girls* you date so carry on.
So I would appreciate some thoughts. I have been dating a guy for 4 months now and he is really sweet and caring and helpful but he is quite a nerd/geek. He works in IT and has his own apartment but he not only is really into video games but has actually tournaments involving card games like yu gi oh and is into dungeons and dragons. He has even tried to get me to try it.
I definitely like him and he hasn't say cancelled a date for it but sometimes he has set up our dates around it, for example no dates on Wednesdays. I don't know how to feel, I know some will say it's harmless but just the thought bothers me. I was talking to a girlfriend and she laughed and told me it was a bad idea and guys like that are losers that always put their stuff before a relationship.
I don't see the problem. It's just a hobby. What if he was part of a, let's say badminton club, that got together every Wednesday for training - would you have opened a thread then?
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