All of the cuddling, all of the naked but no sex...and I couldn't be more confused (married, woman)
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I have found myself in a situation I have never encountered before and would love some perspective, and appreciate anyone who takes the time to read my ramblings ! I'm a woman in my early 30s and have been "seeing" this guy (30s as well), relationship is not defined and has been pretty casual/on off until very recently (but i still don't really know whats going on). Now this isn't the typical, "hey baby it's 1am get your ass over here" thang, we have seen the light of day together and done daytime things many times. The first night we hung out we had a few too many adult beverages and I spent the night with him, but he said he didn't want to have sex that first night (not gonna lie I would have been down, but appreciated the fact that he wanted to wait. From here we spent time together for about a month, seeing each other here and there but keeping it super mellow and casual (at least that was the plan). We were still spending the night together doing basically everything but the big deed.
This went on for a couple of months, and I will admit as much as i tried I caught myself some feelings (there is only so much a girl can naked cuddle with someone before the intimacy is too much to fight lol). I suddenly started thinking about how this guy could and should be more than someone who pops in and out of my life, I had thought he did too. We really seemed to be going in a good direction, but then life got crazy hectic and suddenly days became weeks and I hadn't seen him, so I figured I had read the whole situation wrong and started to write him off as the casual relationship that i originally thought we were going to be and figured staying clear of him would be the best corse of action.
Annnnnyway, cut to this last weekend (about a month and a half since i had last seen him), and there he was, blowing up my phone. I tried to ignore and keep the distance that had been created between us, but Sunday I decided to listen to the message he had left and there he was, saying how he missed me and wanted to see me and basically everything I had wanted to hear. I cautiously returned the call and accepted his invite to go for a walk on the beach to "catch up". This walk turned into 48 hours of being together. We talked, and laughed and reconnected in a way that was different than before. We talked about how we missed each other, how things feel different than it has with other people, basically all of the things. We spent the last two nights together, but just as always...just cuddling, no sex. We lay together naked, cuddled all night, and the intimacy was fully there, but the sex still didn't come (pun intended )
So if you are still with me after all of that, here is my question...could I have actually met that elusive man who just wants to wait and take it slow or am i quickly descending into the friend zone? I want to avoid putting myself back in a situation where i am simply a warm body to cuddle with when he feels like it. I feel so jadded simply having this train of thought, so I need some opinions please!!!! Thank youuuuuu!
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Either he is physically incapable of doing the deed or he's not really that attracted to you or has an STD or he is petrified of getting an STD or getting you pregnant.
If you don't communicate (key word here), you'll torture yourself playing the guessing game. You don't go slient fore fear of losing someone, because if it was meant to be then it should work itself out.
Or he already has a gf. Happened to a friend of mine. Exactly as you have described. Except she spent the holidays with him and family, too.
He recommitted to gf and my friend was history.
Either ask him or dump him. Because both will probably led to same result. If a guy wants a girl, he'll go for it. Pretty simple.
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! I'm a woman in my early 30s and have been "seeing" this guy (30s as well), relationship is not defined and has been pretty casual/on off until very recently (but i still don't really know whats going on). Now this isn't the typical, "hey baby it's 1am get your ass over here" thang, we have seen the light of day together and done daytime things many times. The first night we hung out we had a few too many adult beverages and I spent the night with him, but he said he didn't want to have sex that first night (not gonna lie I would have been down, but appreciated the fact that he wanted to wait. From here we spent time together for about a month, seeing each other here and there but keeping it super mellow and casual (at least that was the plan). We were still spending the night together doing basically everything but the big deed. 
) 
