Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
My friend is started to see a guy who she was in love for many years secretly. They mat in a gym and were acquaintances for a long time. Now it looks like they developing a great relationships. The guy is divorced, 50 y.o. In a great shape, looks younger, very popular and likable. My friend is separated, her is 40. Very pretty, sexy, nice and likable person as well. I do go to this gym sometimes to. To me they both worth each other, they are a match surely.
The problem is, that this guy has a fitness partner in a gym, who is a women. They do exercise for many months together. The problem is that when my friend is in gym as well, and the guy is with his fitness partner, he does not really notice my friend. Which raises a red flag. Usually, my friend and this guy chat a little and say hello to each other. But, not when his fitness body is with him. My friend is suspecting that this guy has an affair with this woman, which is not acceptable for my friend at all. She is not a multy dating person, can only get along with the same. My friend asked the guy about this situation. He told that this women is just a friend and he is not interested in her. They just exercise together, which is a norm for him. He said, he always had gym partners in the past. And the reason he acts like that , is that my friend is still married and he does not want anybody to suspect. My friend pretended she believed him, and acted like this is not a big deal for her. But, inside she is devastated. She called me several times already.
This man means a lot to my friend. She does not want to give up on him just because she suspects he seeing somebody else. She asked me to come to a gym recently to get my own opinion on the situation. I did.
Here is my observation:
- The guy and this women come on the same schedule.
- The women follows him all the time. She does not let him to stay a long for a moment.
- To me she acts like she is his girlfriend, a very possessive and jealous one.
- She looks tense and kinda like a guard who does not want anyone to approach her man.
- She does not look like relaxed gym body, who come just to exercise.
- She is pleasantly looking, at least 15 years younger than him.
- No one in a gym come to talk to this guy when he is with this women.( The guy has many female friends in this place)
- The guy stares at my friend a lot even he is with this woman.
What I think? Hard to say. This “exercising together” indeed looks like an affair. But, why a guy would make it that clear and open if he really wants to have relationships with my friend? A normal man would at least hid his other relationships.
My question to you, guys:
Is it possible this guy just teasing my friend? My friend is pretty and sweet, men makes rounds around her.
Is it possible the guy just testing my friend? How should she act then?
Do you think this guy is sleeping with his gym body?
Is it a norm in American culture to be involved with one women, and openly exercise with another?
I and my friend were not raised in American culture. She is really into him and wants to act like a smart and wise person. She does not want to take any decision that she might regret in the future.
This is why I am writing this post. Please advise and help.
The gym is not a singles bar. It doesn't matter who he's training with.
Why will it take your friend two years to finalize her divorce?
Thank you for your input. The State law. One year of separation. + the divorce usually takes about a year. Then, my friend's husband very emotionally abusive person. He terrorizes her for years. They do not have any close relationships for three years as I know. And, he moved to a basement a year ago. They are practically separated in all possible ways. But, still he refuses to file for legal separation. He promises, but does nothing. I know him, he is a monster. They are not rich people. He threatens to leave her with nothing. She works, but does not make enough to survive on her own.
The gym guy knows her situation well. And, I do not think that for him her marital status is a problem at this point.
Until she gets away from him, she can't expect another man to WANT to walk into that situation.
It's dangerous.
Why is that so?
If her marital status is not a problem for this guy to see her outside and willingly develop a great connection, why her current status should prevent him to at least be honest?
Her is not playing his girlfriend, does not asks for exclusivity..all she wants to know if this guy into her, or if he is playing a game.
Than, there are many cases, when married people had an affair, than divorced and stayed together. Love or deep mutual attraction has nothing to do with your marital status which is a changeable thing.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
