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I would prefer clarity, and for me clarity is pretty easy to achieve. A polite, unambiguous statement that we won't be going out or we won't be going out again is sufficient.
I don't require more information because I assume that I'm a reasonably OK guy without any universally unappealing traits unknown to me til now. A woman who doesn't want to date me is exercising her individual judgment. If I asked her why and she said I was too thin or too soft spoken, I might put on weight or add volume when I talk to another woman.......who likes thin/fit men who are soft spoken and thoughtful. I use those examples because I've had women tell me I'm too thin or soft spoken, and I've been in relationships with women who liked those very traits.
Status:
"I don't understand. But I don't care, so it works out."
(set 19 days ago)
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I don't know, homina. If a woman tells you you're not her type because you're too thin and softspoken, that's who you are and she's just not the woman for you. I wouldn't change something like that for the first couple dates, because you will revert back to your basic self later in the relationship.
Now if a date tells you she's turned off by how sloppy you dress or your table manners are gross, that's something you can (probably should) change to make the next date go well.
There are women who are looking for thin, soft spoken guys - don't change!
I don't know, homina. If a woman tells you you're not her type because you're too thin and softspoken, that's who you are and she's just not the woman for you. I wouldn't change something like that for the first couple dates, because you will revert back to your basic self later in the relationship.
Now if a date tells you she's turned off by how sloppy you dress or your table manners are gross, that's something you can (probably should) change to make the next date go well.
There are women who are looking for thin, soft spoken guys - don't change!
I agree. I can feel a bit socially awkward, and when I was younger it was frequently on display. That's something that's good to work on when dating, or with friends, at school/work, etc. So that's good feedback if i didn't already know that I could appear awkward and appearing awkward isn't always attractive. But I knew that, so someone saying that I'm awkward wouldn't have done me any good. And as with the examples above, one woman might see awkward while another woman might see unassuming or humble. Humble would be a big misread, but that could be the impression I made.
I don't know, homina. If a woman tells you you're not her type because you're too thin and softspoken, that's who you are and she's just not the woman for you. I wouldn't change something like that for the first couple dates, because you will revert back to your basic self later in the relationship.
Now if a date tells you she's turned off by how sloppy you dress or your table manners are gross, that's something you can (probably should) change to make the next date go well.
There are women who are looking for thin, soft spoken guys - don't change!
Or... you can find a woman who likes sloppy dressers with horrible table manners.
They're out there.
It's all about being who you are and being the best you can be so that you can attract someone that is into you.
I agree. I can feel a bit socially awkward, and when I was younger it was frequently on display. That's something that's good to work on when dating, or with friends, at school/work, etc. So that's good feedback if i didn't already know that I could appear awkward and appearing awkward isn't always attractive. But I knew that, so someone saying that I'm awkward wouldn't have done me any good. And as with the examples above, one woman might see awkward while another woman might see unassuming or humble. Humble would be a big misread, but that could be the impression I made.
I am someone who is very awkward, especially when anxiety hits. But some women are into me while others find me to be a turn off.
First of all, would you invite someone you just met to your house?? Common sense should tell you that you meet him at a public location! Also, leading that person on and then avoiding them, giving bull**** excuses and getting caught in your game isn't considered a play?
If such is the case, you have to wonder how many guys has she done this to?
So...she DESERVED to have her house broken into...right? I mean, gosh...PRETENDING to like the guy, and then rejecting him! The nerve! Let's all hope she learned HER lesson!
Or... you can find a woman who likes sloppy dressers with horrible table manners.
They're out there.
It's all about being who you are and being the best you can be so that you can attract someone that is into you.
I don't think there's too much demand for those with horrible table manners, truthfully. I had a first date once who chewed with his mouth WIDE open, he talked with every bite and it was so disgusting I could barely look at him, and it overshadowed any possible connection. I couldn't even concentrate on what he was saying.
So...she DESERVED to have her house broken into...right? I mean, gosh...PRETENDING to like the guy, and then rejecting him! The nerve! Let's all hope she learned HER lesson!
I wouldn't say she deserved it either. We don't even know who, what or why. But that was rather reckless of her to invite someone over to her house that she has barely even met. I hate when a woman does that to even me.
There were times when I declined an invitation telling the woman that she has just met me and that it is better to wait on that.
I don't think there's too much demand for those with horrible table manners, truthfully. I had a first date once who chewed with his mouth WIDE open, he talked with every bite and it was so disgusting I could barely look at him, and it overshadowed any possible connection. I couldn't even concentrate on what he was saying.
Lol. Did he smack REALLY Loud?
Yeah, I don't know how they manage. That had to have been VERY awkward (Understatement).
So...she DESERVED to have her house broken into...right? I mean, gosh...PRETENDING to like the guy, and then rejecting him! The nerve! Let's all hope she learned HER lesson!
I'm with you. She didn't lead him on, she liked him at that time or she wouldn't have invited him over let alone made lunch for him. It just turned out when they spent more time together, sober, it wasn't a love match, and like many of us, she wasn't sure what to say on the spot. OP is acting like this was some sort of game to her rather than she just lost attraction sometime during the date. Ideally everyone would be honest 100% at every second no matter how uncomfortable, but the world doesn't work that way.
I want to add, directly rejecting a near-stranger who is IN your home at that moment can give pause to women. I think it was an awkward situation, and perhaps she chose the wrong way, but to imply she played him and got appropriate payback is just ridiculous.
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