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Old 11-15-2017, 07:09 PM
 
3 posts, read 4,517 times
Reputation: 15

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Me and my boyfriend have been dating for about 3 months and while we're happy together, there's one thing that I can't look past: My mom treating him badly. I'm a Japanese girl with a mom who only wants her children dating other Japanese men. She has strictly said that she wants her kids "with our own kind". She claims it's about "maintaining our culture", but I don't buy that.

For some background info, here's where the rest of my siblings stand. My older brother is married to a Japanese woman, my oldest sister is dating a Japanese man, another older sister is dating a Mexican, and one more older sister is married to a white guy. I was at one point the only child left without a significant other and my mom was pressuring me to date only Japanese men. My boyfriend, however, is white and my mom is constantly insulting him, throwing him dirty looks, and telling him that he should be ashamed of what his ancestors did to our ancestors back during World War II, specifically with Hiroshima and Nagasaki. My boyfriend is one of the nicest guys you can meet. He treats me right, respects me, comes from a nice family, has a stable job, treats my nieces and nephews like they're his own, and overall makes me happy. But my mom doesn't care. She only cares that he's not Japanese.

I can't stand to see him treated like this. I'm seriously considering calling off the relationship not because of him, but because I don't want to see my mom put him through any more criticisms and insults. She's terrible to him and I hate seeing it unfold. My boyfriend claims that he doesn't care and he's willing to go through with it if it means being with me, but I'm not so sure.

I still live with my parents and while my dad wholeheartedly approves of my boyfriend and gets along really well with him, it's my mom that's the issue. What should I do? I care about my boyfriend and that's part of why I think we need to call things off. I hate seeing him treated like this, but I also hate being controlled by my mom. She's constantly trying to set me up with other Japanese men and they ALWAYS end up being *******s who don't respect me as a human being. How should I handle this?

 
Old 11-15-2017, 07:36 PM
 
Location: NW Indiana
44,359 posts, read 20,063,008 times
Reputation: 115312
Very sorry, OP, but race-based threads are no longer permitted, per the Relationships forum rules set forth in the Sticky thread.
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