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There is nothing wrong with you. You are just growing up to be a man who instinctively understands how to get women. The more women you are sleeping with, the more attractive you are to all other women. Thats just how the cookie crumbles. There is only one rule, be upfront and honest about all of these other women, so you are not deceiving or lying to anyone. Dont worry, its an attractant, not a turn off. So you get to brag freely while announcing your sexual prowess, which makes you mroe attractive to women around you. Sounds like a win to me.
You are either:
1. A troll
2. Someone who knows absolutely nothing about females
3. As deep as a mud-puddle.
I believe that happiness is the highest form of wisdom, and it's hard to find happiness (of a meaningful sort, not the fleeting kind that leaves you hungrier than ever shortly after) if you aren't being genuine. If you are lying to others and using others, you are likely not being genuine with yourself, either.
Also? Men I have seen who habitually used women for sex, lied to them, and flaked off to the next as quick as they could... What happens to that man? Well, he develops negative views of women, often enough. That they are easily suckered, that they are unintelligent, not deserving of respect, or that they are grasping and he's got to dodge carefully lest they take his resources... I've known strippers who ended up hating men, and the only reason I could find for that, is that they spent a long time looking into the face of the worst that men have to offer. And I've known famous musicians who confessed after years of having groupies throw themselves at them, that they had lost hope in ever finding LOVE, which despite denying it in their youth, their souls actually craved...and that they'd lost the ability to trust or respect women.
It gets even worse, if a person reaches advanced age, riding this same manifesto of using other people to get by in one way or another, and eventually find themselves too old to pull it off, and still alone, or in an unhealthy relationship because they are too messed up to form a good one.
I have, on the other hand, known at least one man who engaged the women he had casual sex with, in conversations and debates and friendship, and seems to still have a genuine regard for these women, even if he doesn't want to partner up with one. He doesn't seem to hate women at all. Or to dehumanize us. Wanting sex without attachment in the year 2018 should not mean that you have to treat people badly.
A smidgeon of Buddhist sourced philosophy would go a long way toward explaining that when you do harm to others or disregard, hurt, disrespect them, use them or deceive them for your own fleeting gratification...you wind up ultimately harming yourself most of all. And as I mentioned in another recent thread here, unless you are a true sociopath, a sense of moral discomfort, should be telling you something about what you're doing. It is a signal you need to do some thinking about your choices, that you might be denying your authentic self.
I don't give a **** about the Buddhism, but it certainly seems as plain as day.
I don't give a **** about the Buddhism, but it certainly seems as plain as day.
I'm not a religious person, so that's not where I'm coming from with this, there's just a lot of philosophy there that is meant to get you thinking about healthier ways to handle yourself and relate to the world around you. It's why there are a bajillion self-help books that are titled things like "The Zen of..." whatever.
My boyfriend's had me reading stuff. Some of the ideas are useful.
Most of them seem "plain as day" obvious...yet most people don't really think about things that way, especially if they are in the middle of justifying doing something that their internal compass tells them isn't right, but they want the gratification the easiest way. Very human to talk yourself out of doing what we know deep down is the right thing.
I'm not a religious person, so that's not where I'm coming from with this, there's just a lot of philosophy there that is meant to get you thinking about healthier ways to handle yourself and relate to the world around you. It's why there are a bajillion self-help books that are titled things like "The Zen of..." whatever.
My boyfriend's had me reading stuff. Some of the ideas are useful.
Most of them seem "plain as day" obvious...yet most people don't really think about things that way, especially if they are in the middle of justifying doing something that their internal compass tells them isn't right, but they want the gratification the easiest way. Very human to talk yourself out of doing what we know deep down is the right thing.
And people wonder why, and get upset when, I ask them "why".
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