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That's a shame, since that's the stuff that can help you, moving forward, which is what you claim to want to do.
OK, let's talk about that, even though it will be total speculation and mostly worthless since we here on CD do not know her AT ALL:
Never underestimate someone's capacity for blowing you off when their needs are their only focus.
She obviously has problems. Who knows what kind? But the insatiable need some people have for validation will lead them to do outrageous things. When we go along with it and enable it to happen makes the pain that much worse.
Why? It would be a good thing to bring up in a subtle way. Even just saying something casually like, "Yeah, Kellie told me about her most recent 3 month thing with Josh..." and gauge their reactions.
You have to ask yourself why you were SO gullible. She's super hot, isn't she? That's usually the only way people are given carte blanche like that.
Even so, you are SO reluctant to take on any responsibility for completely trusting someone you couldn't verify anything about. That's the part you need to "analyze" the most.
It's ok to be made a fool. It happens to all of us. But you have to recognize how it happened so you can stop it from happening again.
It is not so much hotness as it is her catering to his ego. But yeah, it is definitely important to look at where you went wrong and how you were fooled so that you can not make the same mistake. Fool me once... fool me twice...
Didn't mean to offend anyone, but what seems to be the problem? You're saying there are no women out there like this? I didn't say this applied to all women at all, but it absolutely does to some. I've known some personally, and as explained here, pretty much just dated one.
Maybe I misunderstood your post. But I do think a good rule of thumb is to stick to bashing the one who wronged you.
I'm trying to figure out if there is sarcasm above. There is absolute truth to the fact that SOME women with higher SMV tend to use it to their advantage and absolutely love the excessive attention they get from men and have gotten most of their adult lives. I've personally known women like this. They mess around, date around, break some hearts, and do it all bc they can get away with it. Then as I said earlier, at some point, usually in their 30's, they start to wake up and realize they want that good husband and that nice house and that baby and hit the panic button. I have a friend (girl) who recently told me she completely regrets blowing off an old great boyfriend she had when she was in her early 20's. She's 31 now and desperate to find someone and have kids.
It's taught to women in our society.
Always go for the bigger and better.
I just went though a situation close to yours. 3 months of an amazing time together. The only difference was, we did have supreme ups AND downs.. But you'd think we were on the verge of marriage most of the time.
Beautiful women have a lot of options. The "monkey branch" idiom is accurate. Make no mistake that while they are with you, they are looking elsewhere evaluating OTHER options, even if all is going good.
The 'friends' they have that are men are generally a guise for either a relationship 'coach' or an option to run to.
which is exactly what this girl did. The solution, just play the girls to get laid.
Forget a meaningful relationship, but don't tell them that. Play it off until they do the expected, and then have someone waiting in the wings as well.
The thing about my story that I think is continuing to eat at me a bit and make me wonder is that it wasn't exactly a "textbook" rebound situation. Normally its... Girl latches on and moves quick/guy is down for it/big interest from the girl/super highs for the guy/interest from girl starts to fade out/guy gets blown off and never hears from girl again.
In my situation the girl came BACK to me just one day later explaining in close to tears how she thinks she may have made a bad decision, really did develop genuine feelings for me, but was just "torn" about everything, between me and her ex. Reality ended up being that she just wanted to keep me on a back burner, but when you're talking about big emotions and history with an ex bf, I can kind of understand that. That doesn't mean I was going to be strung along (which I put an end to after just 2 weeks), but I can understand how someone would need to close out a chapter. Of course what I DON'T understand is why she handled the entire thing like she did and let it go as far as it did.
That all being said, she never really did come back to me after finally ending it with the ex, and instead chose to go back to online dating, so it's just a bit of a hard one to understand. Perhaps her excuse of thinking she really did ruin everything and would feel too much pressure was somewhat true.
Last edited by LI7788; 02-19-2018 at 05:56 PM..
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