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Is OP a troll? I honestly can't tell. I'm sort of new to this forum stuff.
Forum rules forbids accusing people of being a troll. There's actually no reason to think he is - his situation is not entirely uncommon. Less common is having someone bring it to a public forum but it happens.
I'm just one person and I know of at least three married men who considered an affair when their wives were giving them a hard time. I also know of women who did the same. One actually had an affair.
While I’d like to hear her side, but I say go for it if you have no kids. You have an obligation to fix the situation though and hear her side. You’re the one who proposed to her. This new girl could end up the same way.
Sorry, OP; it's not believable that her beauty faded at 32. And if you married her for her looks, well, what can we say?
Shallow is as shallow does. You made your choice, Now live with it.
I agree but I do say make the best of it. Fix it - do something positive about it.
But the OP was complaining about her other lacklustre habits and attitude and then on top of that, withholding sex as though in protest or something. Maybe he is expressing himself poorly out of frustration and disappointment or something.
One of the pieces of advice I picked up here is to never let disagreements or fights interrupt our sex life. On the one hand it is very hard to stay angry (or even get angry) with someone we a making love to and being intimate with plus it stops us from wanting to be mean. On the other hand, withholding sex makes us more angry or frustrated or whatever. I wish I had been given that advice at the beginning of my married life.
Another bit of advice that never given during counselling was to take ownership for our own faults in a relationship and work on those.
I think your freedom is worth the price of spousal support. Do you really want to be stuck in a bad relationship? My sister got divorced years ago because she knew if she didn't get out she'd be stuck in the same rut for the next 18 years if she got pregnant. So she left, found someone else, had a bunch of kids and she's happy. If you don't have minor children, I think you're getting out fairly easily.
The wife is only 32. It is pretty unlikely she’ll get spousal support, especially since the OP says she had a job and lost it. It isn’t like she’s been out of the workforce a long time. It sounds like she’s only recently left the workforce and could easily go back. The OP hasn’t told us, however, if his wife is refusing to look for a job again.
If this was a recent job loss? If so, she might still be depressed about it and of course she’s going to expect the OP to be a provider if she IS looking for a job. If he is expecting her to put stuff on credit cards when she has no job and there are no shared finances, that seems a bit ridiculous. If she is out of work, she should be focusing on finding something new, not going to the gym and keeping pretty for the OP.
The wife is only 32. It is pretty unlikely she’ll get spousal support, especially since the OP says she had a job and lost it. It isn’t like she’s been out of the workforce a long time. It sounds like she’s only recently left the workforce and could easily go back. The OP hasn’t told us, however, if his wife is refusing to look for a job again.
If this was a recent job loss? If so, she might still be depressed about it and of course she’s going to expect the OP to be a provider if she IS looking for a job. If he is expecting her to put stuff on credit cards when she has no job and there are no shared finances, that seems a bit ridiculous. If she is out of work, she should be focusing on finding something new, not going to the gym and keeping pretty for the OP.
Every guy ******* that he'll have to pay spousal support when that happens pretty rarely now and only for a short period of time for a SAHS...as if the OP has any money anyway...prenup, as if!
The wife is only 32. It is pretty unlikely she’ll get spousal support, especially since the OP says she had a job and lost it. It isn’t like she’s been out of the workforce a long time. It sounds like she’s only recently left the workforce and could easily go back. The OP hasn’t told us, however, if his wife is refusing to look for a job again.
If this was a recent job loss? If so, she might still be depressed about it and of course she’s going to expect the OP to be a provider if she IS looking for a job. If he is expecting her to put stuff on credit cards when she has no job and there are no shared finances, that seems a bit ridiculous. If she is out of work, she should be focusing on finding something new, not going to the gym and keeping pretty for the OP.
Aah! That's a good point. She lost her job - we don't know why. Maybe she is suffering from depression of some form which might explain her lack of interest in anything and maybe even her losing her job in the first place. A depressed person's personality can take a dive too as a result.
OP, might I suggest you look into that possibility before you do anything. At least rule out the possibility. If she is suffering from depression then it is usually treatable and you could get the woman you married back. Give her a chance at least. And go for counselling.
Aah! That's a good point. She lost her job - we don't know why. Maybe she is suffering from depression of some form which might explain her lack of interest in anything and maybe even her losing her job in the first place. A depressed person's personality can take a dive too as a result.
OP, might I suggest you look into that possibility before you do anything. At least rule out the possibility. If she is suffering from depression then it is usually treatable and you could get the woman you married back. Give her a chance at least. And go for counselling.
OP doesn't sound like the sensitive type - he's only looking for an excuse to screw around. You think he cares about depression? And is empathic enough for counselling to make a difference?
That's really presumptuous. The guy sounds like he's at his wits end. I would hate to be in a relationship like that for a week let alone for however long OP has been dealing with it. Maybe he came here asking for advice as a last resort. Maybe he's completely burned out on the whole thing. Bad relationships do have a way of sucking all the happiness and joy out of life.
That's really presumptuous. The guy sounds like he's at his wits end. I would hate to be in a relationship like that for a week let alone for however long OP has been dealing with it. Maybe he came here asking for advice as a last resort. Maybe he's completely burned out on the whole thing. Bad relationships do have a way of sucking all the happiness and joy out of life.
It's a completely fake troll post. With all the buzzwords s/he used, it's like s/he's playing troll post bingo.
It helps to be able to spot them so you don't waste time responding.
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