How do you define chemistry between two people? (dating, love, older)
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This word get's used a lot and I think it's one of those words we use thinking the definition of it is agreed on by most people. I wonder.
It seems to me people use it as nearly synonymous with physical attraction, attraction that may include but isn't limited to the physical, infatuation, limerence, a meeting of the minds, connection, or liking. Probably other possibilities including some combinations of the things I've listed. Some people use it kind of casually when they end a brief dating relationship because it was lacking. Some people don't use the word at all.
So if you use chemistry as part of your romantic or sexual vocabulary, what does it mean to you?
I don't personally consider sexual attraction to be chemistry. I've had plenty of flirts come and go and i just called it lust. The chemistry i had with my ex was explosive, he was quite older, less attractive, pudgy. But he spoke to my soul, we connected so deeply every conversation lasted hours, i literally wanted to burrow into him, sex was insane, i couldn't get enough. It was like a drug and we knew we were addicted to each other. We also knew we were not a good match but like true drug addicts we kept returning and pulling each other back in.
I guess in my instance chemistry isn't quite as positive as other people. But it was still chemistry for sure.
Romantic chemistry is a connection for me. It means I vibe with them, talking to them is easy, we mesh well, I want to be around them, and I want them to be around me. When I think of them, I get a feeling of pleasantness and they add to my life.
The chemistry i had with my ex was explosive, he was quite older, less attractive, pudgy. But he spoke to my soul, we connected so deeply every conversation lasted hours, i literally wanted to burrow into him, sex was insane, i couldn't get enough. It was like a drug and we knew we were addicted to each other. We also knew we were not a good match but like true drug addicts we kept returning and pulling each other back in.
I'm puzzled by this post. Based on what you described, it sounds like you were a great match.
If you don't mind sharing, I'm curious what the problem was.
I don't personally consider sexual attraction to be chemistry. I've had plenty of flirts come and go and i just called it lust. The chemistry i had with my ex was explosive, he was quite older, less attractive, pudgy. But he spoke to my soul, we connected so deeply every conversation lasted hours, i literally wanted to burrow into him, sex was insane, i couldn't get enough. It was like a drug and we knew we were addicted to each other. We also knew we were not a good match but like true drug addicts we kept returning and pulling each other back in.
I guess in my instance chemistry isn't quite as positive as other people. But it was still chemistry for sure.
Yes to everything above! An ex who was 11 years my senior had me hooked. Unfortunately, he wanted to keep the games going longer than I was interested. However, I will never forget the fun times, and the crazy times too.
Chemistry is a connection with another where you are both interested in being around each other more because you feel interest and comfort at the same time. Chemistry can also be off putting when you are not a good relationship fit but you have off-the-chart chemistry. That has happened to me more than once. That's the hardest part to combat since you like the chemistry but your mind knows this will not work. I'm still waiting for chemistry and interest in commitment. That's a rarity!
The really good kind for me is when we are each our best person because we are together. The bad kind is the infatuation kind where one of us or both are in-love with a somewhat fictionalized version of the other person. That kind is fleeting.
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