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I actually have a virginity related question I would love to get random opinions on... I'm not sure if I can ask it without crossing the PG-13/TMI boundary but I will try.
See I'm not sure which instance "counts" as my own first.
My first boyfriend, my Mom had threatened with physical violence if we had sex, and as he was 19 and I was 14, he was afraid she'd have him put in prison or something. So we made out a lot, but we avoided getting too close to the danger zone, or "going all the way." Lots of the kind of foolery young folks do though. We had a moment...we were going further than we typically did in terms of contact... There was a "slip." "J.T.T." I will say no more. But the act was not carried out, he leapt off of me like someone had set his arse on fire.
We never got that close to sealing the deal again. Ended up breaking up with him, and dating a boy I was in high school with, and he and I later did follow through and have normal sex. If I was still a virgin, or a quasi-virgin, or anything, I certainly was not, then.
But I've never really, really been sure...which of them to consider as "my first."
It's kind of an academic question as I don't really care at this point. They are many years and many partners ago, I no longer have any kind of special connection or care about either of them, and I don't attach any particular magic to the concept of one's "first" beyond the experience itself. I would hope neither of those men hold any sort of sense of attachment or feelings for me, that they are truly engaged with their lives now and whoever they are with. It would be pretty absurd to be carrying any kind of a torch for someone you poinked as a kid that you haven't even seen in like 25 years.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
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Well, I never gave it much thought until the last few years... But I just didn't really grasp how heteronormative my definition of virginity is, and I'm still struggling with that a bit. I would consider the second person your first, personally.
[color=red]..it implies that virginity has actual value that I don't believe it really has one way or another.
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Tell that to that college student who sold hers for several hundred thousand dollars. I forget what the final price was.
I suspect with regard to the wording that the OP might be from a different culture.
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