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So the guy I’ve been seeing for last 2 months said to me
He does not like to put label on things.
We were just having casual chat about our situation
And it kinda drop the question with thinking about it
So I asked “so where do you see things going between us”
Oh lord I regretted the min it came out of my mouth.
He asked with details.
Some I wasn’t expecting, ie I have a lot of good qualities, wife material.
Marriage isn’t even in my agenda any time soon.
But what stuck with me is the fact he doesn’t want to label.
To be honest with you guys I don’t even know how I feel about him or what I want from him but I feel like he already rejected me or he feels indifferent towards me.
And it kinda bothers me, because he said he has got into relationships quite quickly before but now doesn’t want to do that and he wants to take things slowly
And eventually he wouldn’t mind getting into relationship with me if that’s what I want.
But I feel that’s just excuse and he doesn’t like me much, clearly if he liked me enough he wouldn’t risk losing me and he would ask me to be his GF. And Again I don’t know even If I want that.
So Am I to think; no label/going with the flow equals indifference?
Also no exclusivity?
So the guy I’ve been seeing for last 2 months said to me
He does not like to put label on things.
We were just having casual chat about our situation
And it kinda drop the question with thinking about it
So I asked “so where do you see things going between us”
Oh lord I regretted the min it came out of my mouth.
He asked with details.
Some I wasn’t expecting, ie I gave a lot good qualities, wife material.
Marriage isn’t even in my agenda any time soon.
But what stuck with me is the fact he doesn’t want to label. To be honest with you guys I don’t even know how I feel about him or what I want from him but I feel like he already rejected me or he feels indifferent towards me.
And it kinda bothers me, because he said he has got into relationships quite quickly before but now doesn’t want to do that and he wants to take things slowly
And eventually he wouldn’t mind getting into relationship with me if that’s what I want.
But I feel that’s just excuse and he doesn’t like me much, clearly if he liked me enough he wouldn’t risk losing me and he would ask me to be his GF. And Again I don’t know even If I want that.
So Am I to think; no label/going with the flow equals indifference?
Also no exclusivity?
How can it be a rejection? You yourself just said you don't even know how you feel about him or what you want.
So it sounds like you're in the same place.
If you really want a specific answer, it means he definitely wants to keep having have sex with you, but he's not ready to make things official.
Just because he didn't pledge his love to you doesn't mean you need to start the downward spiral of overthinking. Just ... go with the flow.
For many people 2 months isn't enough to KNOW where the relationship is going and many people don't want to label things too early. I totally understand that guy. And you said you don't know how you feel about him either.
So, just give it a time. See where it leads. Try your best and be patient. DONT RUSH. No one likes to be rushed and make too early statements in relationship.
If everything goes good, and you're happy - you shouldn't need labels...
He doesn’t know that though, he probably thinks I am totally in love with him lol
I am definitely overthinking it, like why did the other women before got the label and I don’t.
We've had guys come here and ask why their girlfriends supposedly went all the way with other guys but for some reason want to "take things slow" with them. Sort of a similar thought process.
Either way, only he has the answer. If exclusivity is what you seek, then it sounds like the other night would have been the perfect time to ask specifically about that.
I honestly don't think you can go wrong with being patient and not letting your own insecurities ruin things before they get the chance to start.
So the guy I’ve been seeing for last 2 months said to me
He does not like to put label on things.
We were just having casual chat about our situation
And it kinda drop the question with thinking about it
So I asked “so where do you see things going between us”
Oh lord I regretted the min it came out of my mouth.
He asked with details.
Some I wasn’t expecting, ie I have a lot of good qualities, wife material.
Marriage isn’t even in my agenda any time soon.
But what stuck with me is the fact he doesn’t want to label.
To be honest with you guys I don’t even know how I feel about him or what I want from him but I feel like he already rejected me or he feels indifferent towards me.
And it kinda bothers me, because he said he has got into relationships quite quickly before but now doesn’t want to do that and he wants to take things slowly
And eventually he wouldn’t mind getting into relationship with me if that’s what I want.
But I feel that’s just excuse and he doesn’t like me much, clearly if he liked me enough he wouldn’t risk losing me and he would ask me to be his GF. And Again I don’t know even If I want that.
So Am I to think; no label/going with the flow equals indifference?
Also no exclusivity?
Wait. Clarification needed. You're not in relationship with this guy? IOW, you haven't had sex yet? If you've had sex, who initiated it? If he initiated, then it means HE wanted a relationship. It means you (and he) are now in a relationship. What either of you wants to call it is irrelevant. What's relevant is the nature of your dating.
You need to explain this to him. If he's not currently interested in a relationship with you, explain to him that the "relationship" (sex) needs to stop, per his stated preference. "No relationship" means--no relations.
I have a different take. My take is, why bother with guys like this? I mean, nothing is wrong with them, but there are plenty of men who know what they want and are not hesitant. I've had them and I like these guys a lot better. My time is better spent with the ones are are not so tentative and I just leave the apprehensive ones alone.
I have a different take. My take is, why bother with guys like this? I mean, nothing is wrong with them, but there are plenty of men who know what they want and are not hesitant. I've had them and I like these guys a lot better. My time is better spent with the ones are are not so tentative and I just leave the apprehensive ones alone.
This, too. OP, you said you're not even sure you like the guy, particularly. So why do you even care? Walk away. Problem solved.
Wait. Clarification needed. You're not in relationship with this guy? IOW, you haven't had sex yet? If you've had sex, who initiated it? If he initiated, then it means HE wanted a relationship. It means you (and he) are now in a relationship. What either of you wants to call it is irrelevant. What's relevant is the nature of your dating.
You need to explain this to him. If he's not currently interested in a relationship with you, explain to him that the "relationship" (sex) needs to stop, per his stated preference. "No relationship" means--no relations.
He's not very bright, is he?
We are having sex and to be honest with you, I initiate it.
I am attracted to him obviously.
I don’t think he is seeing anyone else.
I don’t want to break on sleeping with him because what he said but I would like him to clarify what he exactly means ie if still seeking others?
But I thought when someone says going with flow or no label it means they’re open seeing others.
I honestly didn’t question him I just listened and then changed the subject.
This, too. OP, you said you're not even sure you like the guy, particularly. So why do you even care? Walk away. Problem solved.
I do like him, I just don’t know what I want from him exactly, I probably wouldn’t mind being in relationship with him if he asked.
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