How do I find a girlfriend? (date, boyfriend, how to, girl)
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Meetups are a way of making friends. Those friends have friends, relatives, coworkers who are single so might fix you up if they like you. Always better to get a personal reference.
I thought meetups were to make romantic connections.
Anyways, form friendships with women at the meetups. Someone will find you attractive. How did you meet your ex? Not everyone finds the same physical attributes attractive or unattractive. Focus on your most attractive features, look your best. Get in shape if necessary. Keep trying. Could be at the next meetup you'll succeed or 100 meetups from now. Sometimes the timing is out of your hands. Confidence is the number 1 turn on- nothing to do with looks.
I thought meetups were to do the activity in the meetup. If I were a woman and I wanted to, I don't know, paint with a twist in a group or something, I would get annoyed if I showed up to the group and kept getting hit on by desperate guys who were using Meetup as a dating app. If you want to use the internet to find people to date, use a dating site.
Men and women should make themselves as attractive to the opposite sex as possible. That's a good start. Physical attraction separates the friends from the lovers.
Everyone has different ideas on ugly. I can't imagine anyone came flat out and told you that. And being not so good looking seems to have it's advantages where I live. The not so good looking guys with hygiene issues seem to do better than guys with looks that are clean.
I have experimented, I call it playing dress up. I put on expensive clothes and hit the yuppie bars. Next night I wear my worst blue jeans, filthy t-shirt and put in some tacky earring and put on a pair of filthy steel toe boots. I have even been known to purposely rub grease on my arms or hands.
I always do better dressed like a mechanic just off work than a clean cut business person.
Everyone has different ideas on ugly. I can't imagine anyone came flat out and told you that. And being not so good looking seems to have it's advantages where I live. The not so good looking guys with hygiene issues seem to do better than guys with looks that are clean.
I have experimented, I call it playing dress up. I put on expensive clothes and hit the yuppie bars. Next night I wear my worst blue jeans, filthy t-shirt and put in some tacky earring and put on a pair of filthy steel toe boots. I have even been known to purposely rub grease on my arms or hands.
I always do better dressed like a mechanic just off work than a clean cut business person.
I can see something like that happening.
In my area, I seem to do better when I'm not as conventional in my presentation. Being the generic clean cut man in a suit and tie is not going to give you that much attention. For one thing, you don't really stand out. Another thing is there are women who like a man who is not afraid to get "down and dirty". Mechanics can fix things. Businessmen are not as known to fix things as a mechanic. They are more known to pay for the job.
At least with a mechanic, why pay for the job when you can do it yourself.
Another thing is that certain people are better suited for some styles than others. There are some men who can actually "clean up" so to speak in a business suit. Yet, they would fall flat looking like a mechanic.
I myself have never experimented per say. But I have observed. One thing I have observed is that I lost weight, women were a little more responsive to me. Later on, I grew my hair out and twisted it into dreads, women seemed a little more receptive to me. Later on, I switched up my style in clothing and bought some rather unusual men's clothes. And I wore those clothes. Women were approaching me like crazy.
I think it's pretty nice to try out different styles.
I know of several couples who've met through meetup or similar, but they do still have to follow the social contract of the group. People like the OP might show up for one event and unsuccessfully treat it like a meat market, then come on here and complain that the people (read: women) are mean.
If you go to a meetup, you should go because you're interested in the activity at hand, not just because you might hook up. You should become a regular so that people get to know you and vice versa, not just show up once and leave in a huff because you didn't get any numbers.
Great point. Do not appear too eager.
It is true that sitting at home and wishing for a girlfriend will solve nothing. Doing what you are doing is not working. You must do something different.
A common way is to get out and meet people. In clubs or activities. But, become a regular there, as stated above. Don't go and ask someone out right away. Fit in - get active in whatever that meetup is about. Then, if you click with someone for a while, maybe ask someone out. Someone that you made an effort to talk to for several sessions of whatever meetup that subject is about.
I tried going to a meetup.com meeting in pereon, but all the women scoffed at me for being ugly. Any asvice ?
honestly, stop looking for a girlfriend, and get yourself in order. start by opening your heart to everyone, and start showing love to everyone regardless of how much they might annoy you.
when you start hunting for a girlfriend, you put the pressure on everyone, especially yourself and the girl in question. when you relax, and stop looking, and start accepting, the girls will come to you.
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