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Same question for you. If you were dating someone and they stopped responding to your texts, how many unanswered texts would you send before you got the message that they weren’t interested? 5? 10? At what point would you realize that the person didn’t want to talk to you?
It would depend on a lot of variables.
You didnt directly answer the question but it looks like you just went silent on her without saying "Stop texting me."
No it doesn’t, and you know it. Under no circumstances it is ok or normal to send someone you had dated briefly, 50 unanswered texts. At this point you’re just saying things because you’re not willing to admit that this girl was unstable.
How about 50? Would you send 50 unanswered texts? Of course you wouldn’t. Only an unstable person would.
The issue is that YOU WORKED WITH HER and ignored her AT WORK for days. That is not professional. If you had something to say to her, you should have told her immediately that you didn’t want any further romantic entanglement and wanted to keep it professional from then on. Keeping it professional doesn’t mean walking away from your desk, pretending she isn’t there, etc. That is something someone who is 15 does, not something someone who is fortysomething does.
The issue is that YOU WORKED WITH HER and ignored her AT WORK for days. That is not professional. If you had something to say to her, you should have told her immediately that you didn’t want any further romantic entanglement and wanted to keep it professional from then on. Keeping it professional doesn’t mean walking away from your desk, pretending she isn’t there, etc. That is something someone who is 15 does, not something someone who is fortysomething does.
The point is, a normal person would have gotten the message right away. I didn’t want to talk, that was clear, through my actions. There’s no way around that fact. Someone ignores you, that means they don’t want to talk to you. You know it, I know it, anyone rational knows it.
Let me ask you. If you were dating someone and they stopped responding to your texts, how many unanswered texts would you send before you got the message that they weren’t interested? 5? 10? At what point would you realize that the person didn’t want to talk to you?
Your actions were not clear. She stood you up, and she could easily have interpreted your lack of responses to her texts as you just being upset with her.
Let's not forget that you started a thread where you were contemplating giving her another chance. That was when you weren't responding to her texts. So, how was she supposed to know what you were thinking when you yourself didn't even know?
You couldn't figure her out. Maybe she couldn't figure you out either.
Also, don't forget that she sent you a text asking if you were mad at her. That alone is proof that your actions were unclear to her.
Look, she did a really lousy thing by standing you up....but what you ended up doing to her is so unbelievably cold hearted and uncalled for. She didn't deserve this.
I have a feeling that you could get her job back. Do the right thing, Tommy.
I have a feeling that you could get her job back. Do the right thing, Tommy.
Even if I wanted her to come back, which I don’t and wouldn’t even consider an option, my bosses would never let her back. As I said earlier, workplace harassment isn’t taken lightly these days. Not with all the lawsuits going around. I’ve pointed out a few times; my employers have a legal obligation to prevent workplace harassment.
For pete's sake, USE YOUR WORDS. Just say that you are no longer interested in a relationship outside of work. Ghosting is ridiculous from grown-ups.
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