Mismatched sex drives [M31;F32]. I want sex [F32] more than he does. Why do I now feel insecure? (girls, friend)
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I know I need to break up with him but I'm stuck, I broke up with him once before and 3 months later we were back together.
I've never been like this before, when things aren't working I'm usually able to see that and walk away for both our sake. I just don't know how to free myself from this one. It's like my brain has been taken hostage and I panic at the very thought of leaving him ...
That feeling will pass once you are able to get away from him and take a breath. Right now, you are so caught up in your feelings of insecurity and rejection that you are unable to focus on what will be healthier for you.
Sounds like the bad outweighs the good here OP. Be kind to yourself and make a good decision.
This thread has seemed more enabling than edifying since about the third page
Yes, especially since being unable/unwilling to see why you should break up with someone who is toxic and an addict is the definition of codependent.
Telling her that she is, by the way, isn't enabling. It's to alert her to the fact that there is something besides love going on here that is preventing her from moving forward to a healthier and happier place, something she needs to address.
I've decided that I'm going to end it. I just need to figure out how. I'm afraid that if I do it face-to-face he'll convince me to stay.
Put one foot in front of the other. That's how.
The saying "he who hesitates is lost"...is partly true. Stop being lost. Do the right thing...for yourself. Besides he has his "hands" full ...*cough*.
We’re supposed to meet up tomorrow when he gets back from travelling.
Don't.
Tell him you've had time to think and you've come to some conclusions, mainly that the relationship isn't going to work for you.
Tell him you know that this isn't what he wants, but that you aren't happy and he doesn't want or need to be in a relationship with someone who isn't happy.
Then say that's all you're going to say right now, and that you won't be in contact with him anymore. If he tries to call or text you again, block his number.
It seems harsh, but if you're worried you can't even talk to him in person without sticking up for yourself, you need to take serious measures to get out of this situation.
OP sounds like he either lost interest in you (yes, a guy can in fact lose interest in a woman), or he has a medical condition. Or maybe he has become Asexual.
OP sounds like he either lost interest in you (yes, a guy can in fact lose interest in a woman), or he has a medical condition. Or maybe he has become Asexual.
He's become habituated to porn, and has been lying to her about the frequency of his viewing it. It could well have been the cause of his breakups with the previous two women.
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It's to alert her to the fact that there is something besides love going on here that is preventing her from moving forward to a healthier and happier place, something she needs to address.
