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But at the end of the day - I see nothing wrong with sending 1 text to check on her 4-6 weeks later....
what should i say? like how you been? if she responds I am thinking about inviting her to a park or something. if she rejects then thats it for me I will move on.
Try it and see. But a relationship has to have some give and take, and if she isn't giving you anything back, then I would move on. You don't want to have a one-sided relationship where you really like her but she isn't giving you anything back. If she went through a break up from someone very important to her, she might need a little more time than 4-6 weeks to recover from that and often couples will try again and again before they call it quits for good. You don't want to be in the middle seeing her and starting to really like her and her ex comes back.
Try it and see. But a relationship has to have some give and take, and if she isn't giving you anything back, then I would move on. You don't want to have a one-sided relationship where you really like her but she isn't giving you anything back. If she went through a break up from someone very important to her, she might need a little more time than 4-6 weeks to recover from that and often couples will try again and again before they call it quits for good. You don't want to be in the middle seeing her and starting to really like her and her ex comes back.
yeah I agree. I have definitely been there before. On my end it usually never works out despite how hard I would try to make it work once that big break up happens. It wouldn't be the same anymore and there would be that underlying mistrust. How about for you?
So I waited a month and decided to send a "how you been?" No response. The logical thing to do I know is just let it go and move on.
I don't know why but I like this girl a lot. I usually don't feel this way with any other girls. Part of me wants to send a one last hail mary shot.
Just stating "Hey I apologize if I was too forward first time we met. I am usually not that type of person. I just got caught up in the moment. I am planning on going on a real cool hike this week and would love for you to come. If not that is cool and I got the memo. take care." Or something more casual like "I am planning to go on a nice hike this week. If you are free I would love for you to come. Just let me know."
I am never the type of guy to put this much effort in someone that I barely met. Maybe I am a hopeless romantic. From my experience pouring your heart out usually doesn't end well. What you guys think I should do? Part of me feels like I am coming across as needy or creeper status. So I should just give it up and life doesn't always work out the way you want it.
So I waited a month and decided to send a "how you been?" No response. The logical thing to do I know is just let it go and move on.
I don't know why but I like this girl a lot. I usually don't feel this way with any other girls. Part of me wants to send a one last hail mary shot.
Just stating "Hey I apologize if I was too forward first time we met. I am usually not that type of person. I just got caught up in the moment. I am planning on going on a real cool hike this week and would love for you to come. If not that is cool and I got the memo. take care." Or something more casual like "I am planning to go on a nice hike this week. If you are free I would love for you to come. Just let me know."
I am never the type of guy to put this much effort in someone that I barely met. Maybe I am a hopeless romantic. From my experience pouring your heart out usually doesn't end well. What you guys think I should do? Part of me feels like I am coming across as needy or creeper status. So I should just give it up and life doesn't always work out the way you want it.
You already know what the answer is. You’re not actually putting in “this much effort” but rather caught up in your head with an ideal that is colliding with reality. Sounds like some self-reflection is in order.
I think you were given lousy advice to be more persistent. If a woman is interested, you wouldn’t need to be persistent in trying to get together because she would already be willing and available. You now messaged her one last time and she didn’t reply. That is your answer, and some babbling apology and last ditch attempt to get together with someone who may have already blocked you is just foolish.
I am/was kind of in this situation too (I too posted about it). I only went on two dates with this guy - not anything physical - and I had to initiate everything. The last time I sent him a text just to talk, I got no response, yet I STILL wanted to throw one last shot out there to see if he wanted to go out one more time, or to at least get a solid answer that he had no interest. Just like you said, I don't know why I like this guy a lot - but I do.
In my post here, the majority told me to not initiate any more contact and to move on. I took the advice of not initiating even though I wanted to give it one more attempt (and I still do, if I'm being honest). I've talked myself out of making contact mostly because I keep thinking of what would happen if he did agree to another date....and then went cold again - would it be a constant cycle of me wondering what to do next, of trying to figure out if he's interested and just bad at dating, etc. But I'm not gonna lie - there's still a part of me that feels like one more try would give me peace with the situation instead of this continual current state of being unsettled like I'm currently in.
I think I'm just a person that needs closure. I hate 'loose ends' - I can't leave projects unfinished around the house, I won't leave work until what I'm working on is completed, etc. Unfortunately, this doesn't work well in the dating world when you can't expect other's to satisfy your need for closure.
I am/was kind of in this situation too (I too posted about it). I only went on two dates with this guy - not anything physical - and I had to initiate everything. The last time I sent him a text just to talk, I got no response, yet I STILL wanted to throw one last shot out there to see if he wanted to go out one more time, or to at least get a solid answer that he had no interest. Just like you said, I don't know why I like this guy a lot - but I do.
In my post here, the majority told me to not initiate any more contact and to move on. I took the advice of not initiating even though I wanted to give it one more attempt (and I still do, if I'm being honest). I've talked myself out of making contact mostly because I keep thinking of what would happen if he did agree to another date....and then went cold again - would it be a constant cycle of me wondering what to do next, of trying to figure out if he's interested and just bad at dating, etc. But I'm not gonna lie - there's still a part of me that feels like one more try would give me peace with the situation instead of this continual current state of being unsettled like I'm currently in.
I think I'm just a person that needs closure. I hate 'loose ends' - I can't leave projects unfinished around the house, I won't leave work until what I'm working on is completed, etc. Unfortunately, this doesn't work well in the dating world when you can't expect other's to satisfy your need for closure.
i think i am the same way. I rather be blocked and know the answer in a sense than just be left in limbo. But in this case I already know the answer. Every relationship that I have been in came out natural and I never had to push like this. It sucks and it hurts. Should I unmatch her on the dating app?
You already know what the answer is. You’re not actually putting in “this much effort” but rather caught up in your head with an ideal that is colliding with reality. Sounds like some self-reflection is in order.
I think you were given lousy advice to be more persistent. If a woman is interested, you wouldn’t need to be persistent in trying to get together because she would already be willing and available. You now messaged her one last time and she didn’t reply. That is your answer, and some babbling apology and last ditch attempt to get together with someone who may have already blocked you is just foolish.
yeah very true. it sucks and it hurts. stuff you hear in the movies or novels in regards to romance isn't reality lol.
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