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The allusion of more options , and yet here they are . On 3 and 4 date sites at once , or still single for yrs on end, posting all the same problems in forums , and having all the same problems plus many more these days - than ever, in finding that special someone.
At the end of the day it's all just a scam , an allusion . So many more options that still amount to nothing because there's no depth in any of them. That just takes people 5 or 10 yrs to figure out these days but in the meantime it just becomes a more and more throw away and next mentality because of that allusion. It's a circle now, of chasing their own tail.
Not because of using social media for dating, but because social media is a whole lot of sharing of ideas, and so many of the red flags that were glaring with my first hubs (met before social media) would have been obvious to anyone who has a Facebook account. It was not readily clear and apparent to me that many of his behaviors were abusive or signs of really bad things to come.
Women now, usually know better. We have access to that information.
Of course women do still get into bad situations, but at least one cause of it...flat out ignorance...has a better chance to not be the reason why.
And I didn't have merely an "illusion" of more options, I had more options, and far better ones. Ones that I dated, had good times with, and eventually one that I married.
Women who couldn't get a date now probably couldn't back before social media. People talk about self esteem issues and unrealistic beauty standards, but those were just as common back then, if not more so. Women who have unrealistic expectations of relationships now, that can't seem to find anyone, likely would not have had it better before the internet all else being equal.
As for men...well. Yeah, I'd bet it all boils down to which man you ask.
But the thing is, no one had to substitute the internet for living in the real world. Other than Covid throwing a hitch into certain social things for a while...if one were inclined to step forth and engage, social media provides a bonanza of leads, ideas and opportunities to seek out gatherings of people. Those who say that they just aren't good at socializing...well, OK, but would you suddenly BE good at it, if you weren't on the internet? And if so, then why not turn it off if it's working out so badly for you, and go forth into the world? There are still people getting together out there, you know. It only sucks if you insist on believing that ALL of us are sitting at home staring at a screen and never going out, and that the only way to find a partner is to "shop" for one on a dating site.
The problem is that this method feels like it should be easier, but I think a lot of people are realizing that it isn't.
A) Agree with Title
B) Disagree with Title
C) Neutral with Title
Why?
A - Agree that traditional dating was better prior to social media
It would be my opinion that traditional dating is the normal way to date. Using social media (I'm going to use actual Dating sites as my example, not necessarilly Facebook, etc.) has a lot of negative impacts.
1) Dating sites simply set you up for rejection. It is easy to feel rejected time after time and over a period of time this causes anxiety and definitely depression. Dating sites are a "backward" form of dating whereas you "meet" the person AFTER the initial conversation.
2) Traditional dating was safer. Usually you are out with your friends or doing something you enjoy and someone is already attracted to you. You may be to them as well and they jus ask for a date. If you accept it was just a fun date, no expectations, etc.
3) Social media dating has you talking, texting, even flirtatious sexting for quite a while, then you meet them in person and you are not attracted at all. Someone gets ghosted.
There are so many reasons that Social Media dating is dangerous. It is not safe in this world today, it is not the way it is supposed to happen and it's just best to keep to traditional dating.
The good thing about OLD is that you can be who you are upfront without too much worry as oppose to offline and waiting for the right time to tell him that you are a psychopathic, scizophrenic femme fatale who has killed 3, errrr, 7 men.
The bad thing is that it is so much easier for them to be uncouth jerks behind the keyboard and be terribly mean and rude.....and that's if they are honest. Now, the dishonest ones are there so much, one would think that they are all dishonest. They need money, they are on a secret deployment mission to the middle east, they are a dream come true.......and it's all a lie.
What good is instant where in the decades before it took 3 weeks to get a letter back through a service if it is not real anyhow?
Either on line or off line, though, one perhaps become so jaded that neither is easy anymore.
You have a choice on whether to use social media or to meet people in real life. You can choose to limit your time on social media. You can choose to go out and meet people in real life too.
Nobody is forcing you to use social media as a replacement to human interaction. If you're spending a lot of time on social media at expense of real life, it's not just the problem of the technology. But also a problem in the choices you make.
You have a choice on whether to use social media or to meet people in real life. You can choose to limit your time on social media. You can choose to go out and meet people in real life too.
Nobody is forcing you to use social media as a replacement to human interaction. If you're spending a lot of time on social media at expense of real life, it's not just the problem of the technology. But also a problem in the choices you make.
WHERE?
I mean, it's not like you go down to the dealership.
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