Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
So this new term "shooting your shot" - does this mean just randomly asking vast numbers of people out in the hope that a small number of them will agree? Seems like a repackaging of the old "pickup artist" BS.
"Shooting your shot" isn't some new term. But it may be new to you depending on your age/ethnicity.
If you listened to the video, she described a scenario where a woman shoots her shot at a man by DM-ing him on Instagram. If you've never heard the phrase "shoot your shot," then you've probably never heard the term "DM" either. It means sending someone a private message. So anyway, the woman in the scenario DMs a guy she finds attractive. It does not mean indiscriminately asking people out on dates.
And oftentimes, people aren't trying to get serious relationships. They're just trying to have sex. I get the sense that some of you guys must be religious because a lot of people are not seeking serious, deep relationships and just want carnal pleasure from time to time.
So this new term "shooting your shot" - does this mean just randomly asking vast numbers of people out in the hope that a small number of them will agree? Seems like a repackaging of the old "pickup artist" BS.
So if you just randomly ask out people, and 5% of them agree, what's the chance that amongst those 5% there's someone who has enough in common with you to actually generate a relationship? Maybe another 5%? So now we're talking about 5% x 5% or 0.25%, or in other words you've got to randomly accost 400 people to MAYBE get a relationship started? What a stupid way to spend your time and energy.
I'm still going to vote for getting to know people, then becoming friends, then discovering whether romantic feelings are present, then acting on those.
I think it's just street slang for asking someone out. I don't think it specifically means cold approaches. I could be wrong though. You know those kids today, with their hippin and their hoppin, their bippin and their boppin...
I think it's just street slang for asking someone out. I don't think it specifically means cold approaches. I could be wrong though. You know those kids today, with their hippin and their hoppin, their bippin and their boppin...
What would you say the median age is around these parts? The median age in the U.S. is 38. This forum seems to skew significantly older.
I am not really sure what 'shooting your shot' means in this context.
I think that there are multiple ways for a woman to successfully get into a relationship. If a woman really doesn't feel comfortable asking out a guy, I think that is fine. I do think that there are some women who probably are comfortable with asking out a guy and I don't really see any compelling reason those women should not ask guys out.
The woman in the video made the argument that guys might just use women who ask them out as an opportunity to get sex, but I think that there are probably guys looking for sex when guys ask women out too. Women seem to be able to successfully navigate that situation to various degrees of success. I don't reallly see how this situation is appreciably different.
"Shooting your shot" isn't some new term. But it may be new to you depending on your age/ethnicity.
If you listened to the video, she described a scenario where a woman shoots her shot at a man by DM-ing him on Instagram. If you've never heard the phrase "shoot your shot," then you've probably never heard the term "DM" either. It means sending someone a private message. So anyway, the woman in the scenario DMs a guy she finds attractive. It does not mean indiscriminately asking people out on dates.
And oftentimes, people aren't trying to get serious relationships. They're just trying to have sex. I get the sense that some of you guys must be religious because a lot of people are not seeking serious, deep relationships and just want carnal pleasure from time to time.
Oh, I know.
But wanting 'carnal pleasure' in the context of a committed relationship based on love and respect has nothing to do with being 'religious'. In fact, some of the most blatant hypocrites I've known - and not only when it relates to relationships - have been 'religious' types.
I mean, I'm not even opposed completely to "casual" sex (meaning no intention of a relationship, not meaning hookup with a total stranger) but I guess where my confusion about what we're talking about here had to do with the fact that I've learned the hard way that I really can't even know if I am attracted enough even for that, without a little bit of interaction in between first encounter and sexual encounter.
I'm actually remembering an instance where I DID message a guy because I thought he was hot, which is unlike me generally, but I was new to my alt community and new to the affiliated website and trying to just...figure out how it all worked, I guess. So there was this one man who had these GORGEOUS pro photos done. Like, long hair, bare chest, leather pants and costume angel wings. Whew! How exciting! But we never seemed to sync up availability to meet, and the opportunity passed by. Later I find out he's a musician and a massage therapist and works Renaissance festivals. Wowwww... I was totally kicking myself for not trying harder to connect with him when I had the chance, by the time this information landed in my lap, he had a girlfriend. Oh well, I thought. Life goes on.
Then one day I actually met him in person at an event, and chatted with him. Oh. Oh...dear. OK. Nevermind. Instant nevermind. He had an unexpectedly high voice and really came off, in subjects of our conversation as just a whole lot younger, less mature, less solid of an adult in his demeanor and life circumstances. Sometimes you meet someone in person and the vibe just is...not there. It's kind of a bummer, honestly, even if he was no longer available I wasn't really prepared to be so let down!
But I guess my revulsion for the concepts of "shooting your shot" and "spitting game" and all that... Like a lot of regular people make the mistake of feeling too invested in a possible outcome if they load all of this mental weight on an "approach" with a specific agenda. You know what you want and if it doesn't happen, that is disappointing. I'm just a little too zen for that. I want to take, experience, and enjoy each moment and each step as it's happening, without grasping at a future that may or may not be possible. Whether that is a Friday night or a lifelong marriage. And I really just like talking to people anyways. I can go to a party and meet a dozen new people every weekend, and I love it. And if I were available and open to more than friendly chatting, there are any number of possible connections that could spark a bit hotter...but if not, that's alright. But if I meet a guy who would never want to be friends with me, only is pursuing a goal and an agenda and I'm just one more shot in a numbers game...he doesn't, as far as I'm concerned, even see me as a person but as a dice roll, I'm no better or worse than the next warm body down the line. And yeah, in fact, it feels very much similar to how a con artist tries to make some sort of personal connection with people but only sees them as marks to use. And this even includes men who want wives or serious relationships, in fact it's a higher risk in those...because I don't imagine this dude being a good companion, a best friend, someone who I can rely on, someone who cares what I think or how I feel. More a "wife unit" to fulfill a set of expectations. No different from the next warm body. A man who says he loves me but really just loves getting his own needs met. Been there, done that, it ended badly, so not a kind of energy I'm willing to engage with ever again.
I am not really sure what 'shooting your shot' means in this context.
I think that there are multiple ways for a woman to successfully get into a relationship. If a woman really doesn't feel comfortable asking out a guy, I think that is fine. I do think that there are some women who probably are comfortable with asking out a guy and I don't really see any compelling reason those women should not ask guys out.
The woman in the video made the argument that guys might just use women who ask them out as an opportunity to get sex, but I think that there are probably guys looking for sex when guys ask women out too. Women seem to be able to successfully navigate that situation to various degrees of success. I don't reallly see how this situation is appreciably different.
Exactly! A woman shooting her shot isn’t avoiding a guy who only wants sex anymore than when she’s the one being asked.
She only turned him down because she was engaged. This is beside the point anyway. The point is that people spit game at random strangers all the time with varying degrees of success. The video was just a light-hearted example of that. You guys are analyzing it way too seriously.
You’re the one who posted it as a good example of people “spitting game at random strangers”, and wouldn’t we say yes to that?
Then when enough people tell you it’s not something they’d enjoy, and what were the results of your example… you change the goal posts and say that’s not the point.
Ok. Show something where it’s successful if you’re looking for confirmation bias.
]"Shooting your shot" isn't some new term. But it may be new to you depending on your age/ethnicity. [/b]
If you listened to the video, she described a scenario where a woman shoots her shot at a man by DM-ing him on Instagram. If you've never heard the phrase "shoot your shot," then you've probably never heard the term "DM" either. It means sending someone a private message. So anyway, the woman in the scenario DMs a guy she finds attractive. It does not mean indiscriminately asking people out on dates.
And oftentimes, people aren't trying to get serious relationships. They're just trying to have sex. I get the sense that some of you guys must be religious because a lot of people are not seeking serious, deep relationships and just want carnal pleasure from time to time.
I'm 65. "Shooting your shot" has been around as long as I've been an adult at least. I've always taken it to mean "Take a chance. Be assertive. Ask for what you want instead of being passive.
Shooting your shot
Take your best shot
Here's a shot in the dark
It's not a new concept.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
