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Recently, my dept at work did karaoke at a local restaurant/bar as a teambuilding event. They broke us out into 4 teams that each had 2 turns to sing. We also had the option to challenge people in other teams to a solo.
Naturally, most people were afraid they'd make a fools of themselves up there. That especially included my team. Two people didn't show up, one left early, and the rest didn't even seem motivated to pick songs.
It was my first time ever doing karaoke, but I sensed I might be good at it given that I love listening to music and even memorizing the lyrics to my favorite songs. I find it fun to sing songs you know by heart because it makes you feel like you're part of the band. You can lose yourself in the process.
I took charge in not only naming our group but picking the songs while we were there. (Other teams had chosen their songs well in advance.)
The truth is that even though I'm friendly/polite with co-workers, I'm not the most talkative guy on the planet by any stretch. I'm just not one to run my mouth/get loud for no reason. I generally keep to myself and do my work, even though I strike up conversations here and there.
Let's just say I blew everyone away. People saw someone entirely different on stage. I picked fun, upbeat songs I knew well and did a good job if I do say so myself. I made gestures while singing for effect. I was challenged to a solo and nailed it.
In the end, my team made it to the finals but fell short of winning the competition. A lot of women (no men) came up to me to say how impressed they were. One of them said that it's always the people you'd least expect who end up letting loose like that at social gatherings.
That day or the next, some people at the event even sent me LinkedIn requests or immediately accepted those I issued to them.
Is it safe to say these women were taken with my confidence to get up there and belt it out?
Does this explain why so many women dig musicians and men in uniform?
Is it that the thought of a guy who puts himself out there and doesn't care what others think stirs women's emotions and ups the attraction?
I like confidence in men but I can't say it's the quality that attracts me the most. Attraction for me starts during our initial conversation. I feel more attracted when he hits on certain points that I relate to and can keep the conversation evolving and also make me laugh.
That day or the next, some people at the event even sent me LinkedIn requests or immediately accepted those I issued to them.
Is it safe to say these women were taken with my confidence to get up there and belt it out?
Does this explain why so many women dig musicians and men in uniform?
You had colleagues request connections on LinkedIn. It's networking--they weren't necessarily trying to get in your pants. It's likely that you hadn't made much of an impression before this work event, and now these people know you exist and what you're kind of like as a person.
Last edited by fleetiebelle; 10-23-2022 at 10:08 AM..
You had colleagues request connections on LinkedIn. It's networking--they weren't necessarily trying to get in your pants. It's likely that you hadn't made much of an impression before this work event, and now these people know you exist and what you're kind of like as a person.
I really agree with the bolded.
The OP may have finally revealed a bit of personality that his coworkers have never seen before. Nothing to do with the attraction of rock stars and men in uniform.
You had colleagues request connections on LinkedIn. It's networking--they weren't necessarily trying to get in your pants. It's likely that you hadn't made much of an impression before this work event, and now these people know you exist and what you're kind of like as a person.
Yup-- this.
"Confidence" involves so much more than singing karaoke. Some of these people who didn't show up for the karaoke night may have plenty of confidence of their own in different ways (or indeed may have been quite confident that dragging their tone-deaf selves up there to sing was a bad idea...).
I'm glad you had fun and made friends and work connections, OP, but it's not the only measure of confidence out there.
(As far as it being THE quality that attracts women most in men... well, all women are different so we're not all going to agree on what is most attractive in a man. Confidence, in general, attracts people, in general, because most people prefer their friends and associates not be the "cowering in the corner" type, it's true...)
It's some kind of forced socializing or something, it's creepy.
This^^^
As far as networking: If I thought there was a chance attending such an event might lead to more work or a job offer I would go otherwise... forget it.
Last edited by john3232; 10-23-2022 at 11:06 AM..
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