Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I suppose there is weird clingy, but when I am happy in a relationship I want to be with them 24/7. When I ask for space, I've already checked out of the relationship.
My boyfriend normally calls during the day (even though we live together). Sometimes it's one call, on Monday it was 11 calls. Mostly short calls. I had gotten upset the night before and even though we were fine, I think he just felt like he had to keep checking in. Nothing felt clingy. On the other hand, had a guy who just texted me each day and that felt weirdly clingy, probably because I wasn't feeling it with him.
Have an open door policy and if it gets abused then change the locks.
Just tell her we should end it and she can have all the space she can ever need.
As for abused I was watching a narrated reddit video last night. If she dumps me for Walter the wifebeater she can call a shelter or figure things out on her own.
Because pursuing someone whose not interested in you is a waste of your time, and it's annoying to the other person if they clearly expressed they were uninterested yet someone is still pursuing them.
It's not just about your needs; you have to respect the other person's boundaries too.
Now I know a lot of you are going to respond with "well then she didn't like you to begin with." But I guess the question that I'm trying to ask is what good is the "give her space" advice then??
If a woman says, "I need space," she's really saying, "I need to put a lot of distance between me and you." It's the nice way to say, "Yeah, this relationship isn't working any longer."
Or, more to the point, "My God, you're suffocating me."
Context is needed here, Simon. Were you calling her multiple times a day? Were you at her side every waking moment you weren't at work? Were you asking her whereabouts when she wasn't?
I don't believe in blaming guys at all junctures here, but the "I need space" line tends to be a euphemism for deep dissatisfaction. Or, to be more precise, a belief that she currently has no space of her own.
Healthy relationships begin by allowing each other space, not one partner eventually having to demand it.
Just tell her we should end it and she can have all the space she can ever need.
As for abused I was watching a narrated reddit video last night. If she dumps me for Walter the wifebeater she can call a shelter or figure things out on her own.
Oh, Jeez. What a cringe-inducing video. Hey, no doubt the wife is the villain here, but the bitter ex-husband whining for twenty minutes and then airing it on YouTube isn't exactly sympathetic, what with his weirdly obsessive and sarcastic personality.
If she doesn't want to be with you, you have to accept it and move on. If it means she's with another guy, so be it. Not giving her space is probably going to make things much worse, unless she is playing a game and testing your interest. It's never easy.
She's going to think I'm too clingy/possessive and lose interest. But if I do give her space then she ends up with another guy. So it's a lose/lose situation.
Maybe you should turn the focus inward, instead of on her, to figure out what you're doing wrong. Has this happened in more than one relationship of yours?
She's going to think I'm too clingy/possessive and lose interest. But if I do give her space then she ends up with another guy. So it's a lose/lose situation.
^ In this case, it's not that you pursuing her is making her lose interest. She already lost the interest to begin with. She's already going to look for another guy.
You already know the answer to this question. You just have a hard time accepting it.
You're looking for us to give you validation or show you some magic solution (which doesn't exist) to win someone over who isn't into you.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
