Being asked out, I'm curious about something (date, girlfriend, married)
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Are any of you rarely, to never asked out in person (not counting meeting someone online)? I've just always been someone who's rarely asked out in person (I think it must really come down to some vibe I throw out, as there have been plenty of people who are surprised at this, heck I'll even post a photo to show that I'm at least moderately attractive ).
Anyhow, I'm just curious to know if anyone else, male or female, has this same affliction. If so have you taken any proactive measures and have they worked? I've been told I should just strike up conversations with people and ask them out myself, but I am truly terrified of talking to guys I find really attractive, much less asking them out. I have no trouble talking to guys who I do not find physically attractive. I can also do just fine talking to the cutest guy in the world, if it's in a work setting, I can flirt, be funny, blah, blah, blah, but if I wasn't at work I'd have a hard time doing the same (I'm referring mainly to jobs I had in sales/customer service guy & girls naturally do a lot of non-romantic flirting in these jobs).
Many of the guys I'm most attracted to are not "super model types", I like weird little quirks and such, do you think it's at all possible that some of these guys might have been interested but as shy as myself?
Anyhow, mainly I'm posting this to see if any of you have had similar life experiences.
When I was younger, I was like you. I could not talk to the opposite sex to save my life. Also like you, I realized it was a problem.
Do you know what I did? I made it a point to meet one new person a day. I would just strike up random conversations with people. This helped my confidence, and I moved on to talking to women that I found attractive. By that point, I was over my shyness. I could walk into a room and have a blast and walk out at the end knowing everyone and having at least one date if I was in the mood. And my looks? I'm a short, fat ugly troll
So, in other words, put yourself out there. Learn and gain some confidence, and then go after the type you are interested in. I will add, I'm also a nerd with a few different little quirks. So, we are out there, and not all of us are the shy introverts that everyone thinks of when they think of us.
EDIT: To answer your second question: Yes, some of the guys that you are interested in are also interested in you but are too shy to express themselves. Never doubt that for a minute.
I'm 31, I would have thought this would have passed by now lol. But maybe I just wasn't thinking about doing something to change things in the past. I don't have any problems meeting/asking people out online, but that is largely because they have already expressed interest in me.
Thanks for the input. I will try to put it to use when i'm in town, I currently live in an area of 500, so I already know pretty much everyone here .
Are any of you rarely, to never asked out in person (not counting meeting someone online)? I've just always been someone who's rarely asked out in person (I think it must really come down to some vibe I throw out, as there have been plenty of people who are surprised at this, heck I'll even post a photo to show that I'm at least moderately attractive ).
Anyhow, I'm just curious to know if anyone else, male or female, has this same affliction. If so have you taken any proactive measures and have they worked? I've been told I should just strike up conversations with people and ask them out myself, but I am truly terrified of talking to guys I find really attractive, much less asking them out. I have no trouble talking to guys who I do not find physically attractive. I can also do just fine talking to the cutest guy in the world, if it's in a work setting, I can flirt, be funny, blah, blah, blah, but if I wasn't at work I'd have a hard time doing the same (I'm referring mainly to jobs I had in sales/customer service guy & girls naturally do a lot of non-romantic flirting in these jobs).
Many of the guys I'm most attracted to are not "super model types", I like weird little quirks and such, do you think it's at all possible that some of these guys might have been interested but as shy as myself?
Anyhow, mainly I'm posting this to see if any of you have had similar life experiences.
I'm married and I get asked out quite a bit still.....of course it's flattering but it does kinda seem like I'm being approached more now than before I was married.....I think a lot of it has to do with Confidence and not looking like your looking.......When you look like your content with yourself you are much more appealing......not to mention having confidence....if you have confidence you are soooooo good to go!
I'm married and I get asked out quite a bit still.....of course it's flattering but it does kinda seem like I'm being approached more now than before I was married.....I think a lot of it has to do with Confidence and not looking like your looking.......When you look like your content with yourself you are much more appealing......not to mention having confidence....if you have confidence you are soooooo good to go!
I agree everytime i'm in a relationship there is always one girl that will ask if I have a girlfriend, and to their disappointment i say yes.
Like lola stated when you are not looking you have a different demeaner and others will pick up on it and think wow this person seems real nice.
But it doesn't hurt to exchange numbers in case things go sour.
Okay okay.......I was agreein' with you there up until your last scentence.......that's so sad you can't have a back up person!
LOL, well you know i'm in my early 20's...i'm not married just having fun. After I get the number, i make it clear i have a g/f but if she ever wants to hang out in a group setting that it would be fun.
LOL, well you know i'm in my early 20's...i'm not married just having fun. After I get the number, i make it clear i have a g/f but if she ever wants to hang out in a group setting that it would be fun.
never solo rendevous.
and girls still give you thier number after you tell them that they are pretty much a back up plan??? Your either soooo full of it, smokin' hot or you just attract "educationally challenged" ppl
lol
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). 
you can't have a back up person! 
